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Do You Think That The Courts Favor Women In Custody Battles?

Astro-Boy PHAET 2009/10/16 20:36:26
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Seen it on the People's Court right now, thought it'd be interesting to see what you all thought.
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  • medarlin~xanax goddess~ 2009/10/17 05:27:56
    Yes
    medarlin~xanax goddess~
    +4
    I have many horror stories about a certain woman who has gone so far as to attempt suicide with her kids present, yet the court gave them back unsupervised after only 10 counseling sessions because she's the bio mom. Nuts, huh?

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  • joey 2011/09/10 03:36:59
    Undecided
    joey
    +1
    well you see i have been a faithful husband 1 yearago aroundnd the ex-wife went on to have 2 adventures and then when separated i hade several encounters with the cops , saying that i hd to give them her the kids because she is the mom, well i guess i lost for being faithfuland always providing for my family.i went to the frien o the court and they asked me if she was an unfit mother, is that political ight questions tha they through at you and you dont know how to anwer, if that question was a set up or ignorant ,ofcourse she is not a murder , she is only a not responsible mother who like togo around sleeping around and here iam with the kids without me knowing about this . can this be a good reason to for an unfit mother , yes it is . i think that even my laywer say that same thing. i hope someone can help me on this , what are my option. why do people cant really see this, i mean she has asked for foodstamps and hoiusing and the rest of that stuff, and i have a hose and have always been in astable job for years, even when to school to get my bachelors degree i mean what qualities does she have as a good mother , she never finish high school and never wanted to do nothing with her live, i dont mean to say that there is a problem with public assistance , but when you get ...
    well you see i have been a faithful husband 1 yearago aroundnd the ex-wife went on to have 2 adventures and then when separated i hade several encounters with the cops , saying that i hd to give them her the kids because she is the mom, well i guess i lost for being faithfuland always providing for my family.i went to the frien o the court and they asked me if she was an unfit mother, is that political ight questions tha they through at you and you dont know how to anwer, if that question was a set up or ignorant ,ofcourse she is not a murder , she is only a not responsible mother who like togo around sleeping around and here iam with the kids without me knowing about this . can this be a good reason to for an unfit mother , yes it is . i think that even my laywer say that same thing. i hope someone can help me on this , what are my option. why do people cant really see this, i mean she has asked for foodstamps and hoiusing and the rest of that stuff, and i have a hose and have always been in astable job for years, even when to school to get my bachelors degree i mean what qualities does she have as a good mother , she never finish high school and never wanted to do nothing with her live, i dont mean to say that there is a problem with public assistance , but when you get on your feet go and get a good job and be succesful. and her im afrid of the outcome this december. i hope my kids would never live in an evioment for life, i want them to be succesful and the government is suppose yo step in to do something about this we are creating people that live like that or years to come, i have no problems again with this program but man when you get a chance to improve your life , then do that.
    (more)
  • MommaCat 2011/06/16 14:23:39
  • sydney 2010/10/21 17:15:21
    Yes
    sydney
    +1
    my mom was verbally abusive. she is a cocaine addict and alcoholic. she still technically has custody but I'm sixteen and refuse to see her. i dragged my baby brothers away too and after she tried to kill herself while sitting in a crack house, the court awarded TEMPORARY custody to my dad. how is this fair? now we have to pay to take her to court.
  • MommaCat sydney 2011/06/29 12:54:51
  • Tommy 2010/10/01 12:58:57
    Yes
    Tommy
    The reason courts favor women is very simple. Follow the money trail. 78% of all divorces are initiated and filed by women in the U.S.. Lawyers know that most men are smart enough to want to settle a divorce without hiring an attorney. They would rather go through mediation or work an agreement out with their wife ahead of time before filing the paper work for a divorce with no trial needed . Most women are pressured by other women to hire an attorney because they know the courts will favor them. This, in turn, forces the man to hire ant attorney to defend himself. What would have been about $300 in legal fees now jumps to over $10,000 in legal fees on average. Who benefits in this case? Lawyers, of course, and women are the reason for this. You can bet the lawyers are going to reward them for this in the courtroom. The judge will reward the lawyers because they are ex attorneys and will protect their profession.
  • Paul 2010/08/17 23:12:57
    Yes
    Paul
    +1
    Women have the upper hand all the time it's set up for women to prosper! 50% 50% and they still get paid for it and what ever they want they get 90% of the time. Someone really needs to start a fund up and fight this in the courts.
  • Ikitome 2010/01/14 09:03:32
    Yes
    Ikitome
    +3
    So far they claim there if there's any conflict between parents then the child suffers living with both, doesn't matter where the conflict originates from. The kids mother even kidnapped our son (moving provinces without letting me know) and yet she's still the "better" parent that is innocent and because I don't bow to her I'm "causing conflict" and thus am an unfit father.
    The courts are very biased, there has been only 1 judge that did not seem biased to me, but of course I've never seen him in court with us only with other people.
  • Fingon Celebrindal 2009/10/19 15:25:14
    Yes
    Fingon Celebrindal
    Yes. Its the same all over the world. What bothers me is that it is based on the perception and not concrete proof that children will do better in a single parent home headed by a mother and not father.
  • hatshepsut123 2009/10/18 23:29:53
    Yes
    hatshepsut123
    +1
    and they should be. usually mom's are the ones who sacrifice more for their children.
  • QueliKelly 2009/10/18 20:58:29
    Yes
    QueliKelly
    we still have this notion that women are supposed to take care of the kids and men are supposed to work. no one even stops to consider that plenty of fathers are more capable of childrearing than mothers.

    but i think we are better of here than in a number of other countries where women get custody automatically. at least here men have a bit of chance.
  • zack 2009/10/18 03:28:16
    Yes
    zack
    +1
    My boyfriend works for CPS and he is always complaining that it happens quite a bit.
  • PrettyJude 2009/10/17 21:35:10
    Yes
    PrettyJude
    okay. so my friend caleb's stupid girlfriend cheated on him and got pregnant but didnt know who the dad was! Wait-- she still doesnt know who it is! And they are going to DNA test the baby because they think its Caleb's. So caleb has been taking care of the baby and buying it all the stuff it needs and even gave him his name and last name, and if the baby is his he wants to keep it because they broke up and she doesn't want to let him see the baby anymore.
    Come on. He has the money and house and people who can take care of baby and love him, and aparently hes the mature one!! So they went to a lawyer but he told Caleb and his dad that they don't have a big chance of wining custody becuase the chic is the mother-- even if she lives with a single mom and three siblings and doesnt work.
    And now Caleb is depressed because he misses the kid. :(
  • slim8961 2009/10/17 12:32:19
    No
    slim8961
    They used to not so much anymore.
  • debadow 2009/10/17 07:44:44
    Yes
    debadow
    +1
    Most of the time even when they are unfit.
  • Duke 2009/10/17 05:28:39
    Undecided
    Duke
    I couldn't say how things are now, but 22 years ago, when I (the father) fought for and won custody of the kids, it was pretty much a surprise to most people.
  • medarlin~xanax goddess~ 2009/10/17 05:27:56
    Yes
    medarlin~xanax goddess~
    +4
    I have many horror stories about a certain woman who has gone so far as to attempt suicide with her kids present, yet the court gave them back unsupervised after only 10 counseling sessions because she's the bio mom. Nuts, huh?
  • Israelite 2009/10/17 05:05:58
    Yes
    Israelite
    +1
    women file three to one over men for divorce and the courts favor them not only in custody but alimony / monetarily / assets / etc .
  • Nabael 2009/10/17 03:33:18
    No
    Nabael
    +2
    I do not think so. Because I have had my parents fight over me, and my father won.
    My mom walked out on me and my dad, and disappeared when I was just a little lad (maybe 2 or 3 at most). She did not decide to come back and try to reconnect with me until I was 9, and by then I had a hatred for her, for what she did to us. She destroyed my father, and the only reason he got up was to see my childly smile every morning when he ushered me off to school.
    I began to get a decent relationship with her by the time I was 11, in which out of the blue she decided she wanted to rip me away from my father. They fought for me, and over a very short time, my father won. I have no seen her since, she seems to have disappeared again.
    I really do wish I had a close relationship with my mother, but she has proven to me she is no longer worth the title of being my mother.
  • S 2009/10/17 02:59:24
    No
    S
    +2
    it used to be that way but it's starting to slowly change
  • Fallen affect 2009/10/17 02:47:55
    Yes
    Fallen affect
    Cause they can show of their body parts more than guys can which can swede the judge more
  • Kari 2009/10/17 02:47:46
    Yes
    Kari
    Sure, without a doubt, usually. Unless the Mother is obviously unfit to take care of her children. But, under normal circumstances, the Mother is definitely favored. But, to be perfectly honest, I think that most children favor their Mother atleast a little bit. Kids tend to spend more time around their Moms and are nurtured more by their Mom. Naturally, they feel a bit more attached to her.
  • Death Faerie 2009/10/17 02:36:08
    Yes
    Death Faerie
    +1
    In many cases kids belong with their mom, but not in all cases. Unfortunately though, they tend to favor even abusive or bad moms
  • concerned 2009/10/17 01:14:46
    Yes
    concerned
    +1
    and all mothers are not mothers at all
  • Death F... concerned 2009/10/17 02:37:32
    Death Faerie
    What do you mean by "and all mothers are not mothers at all" Do you mean not all mothers are mom material or do you mean all mothers aren't mom material?
  • concerned Death F... 2009/10/17 22:41:38
    concerned
    some women give brith and some give brith and love and rise their childern ..
  • Death F... concerned 2009/10/18 00:12:58
    Death Faerie
    Just because a mom doesn't raise her child doesn't necessarily mean she doesn't love her child. Sometimes she gives her child up or lets the father RAISE (raise, not rise) her child because she knows she can't provide for the child.
  • concerned Death F... 2009/10/18 17:34:53
    concerned
    that maybe true in some small cases .. but it also gives sorry ass moms a reason to give up their childern ..
  • Linda 2009/10/16 23:40:20
    No
    Linda
    +2
    No I dont think so, I think the parent ...mother or father has to prove that they are a good parent when they are in a custody battle.
  • FencerCat 2009/10/16 23:27:34
    Yes
    FencerCat
    +3
    The burden of proof usually falls to the other party. And birth mothers get favor above adoptive parents, even when the birth mother clearly can't provide for the child.
  • NatAlex23 FencerCat 2009/10/17 00:33:30
    NatAlex23
    +2
    So do birth fathers, just to be fair.
  • FencerCat NatAlex23 2009/10/17 01:57:55
    FencerCat
    True. I've heard of cases where people adopted and then a while later the birth father decides he never consented to have the baby adopted. Personally, I think they should get that all straightened out before adoptive parents get the child so that once the adoption happens, that's it. Part of the reason I never adopted was that I didn't want to go to all of the expense and then have some 14 year old change her mind... I only wanted a baby that was free and clear.
  • Death F... FencerCat 2009/10/17 02:42:15
    Death Faerie
    not all birth moms are 14, I was 30. Also not all mom's will change their mind. I didn't, even while I bawled my eyes out over leaving the hospital with no babe in arms, I stuck with my decision. Many of us just want pictures and letters. Perhaps if birth moms got that, they wouldn't try to take their child back. Imagine what its like for a birth mom to never know how her child is doing. We are treated like crap, like nothing more than dogs giving birth to puppies. This is why I advocate abortion over adoption, many birth moms aren't given any thought at all, unless they decide to take their child back. I know I wouldn't. That little boy doesn't know me, it would be just as cruel of me take him away from his adoptive father as it would for someone to take away the children I am raising, both to the child and the parents.
  • FencerCat Death F... 2009/10/17 16:20:50
    FencerCat
    I know not all are 14 or that all of them change their minds. What I was presented with when I looked into adoption was the idea that the birth mother gets to choose whether or not I would be a good parent for her child (and I don't consider teens who have babies to be especially good decision makers, which many of the people presented in the discussion I was involved in were. On top of that, I've never won a popularity contest in my life, so I don't imagine anyone would pick me). And most, if not all of the birth mothers they were talking about were teens. Then, if "chosen" I would be expected to pay out up to $20,000 to the birth mother for her expenses (which I consider buying babies, which I thought was illegal in this country) over and above about the same amount for the legal and "administrative" costs involved. I was told I'd spend that much to have a baby of my own, to which I countered, I would not, since I have health insurance. (we're not talking cribs and diapers, which are not part of that expense) And then after all that, it is possible that the girl changes her mind (I had a cousin who did exactly that, which I think is a terrible thing to do to someone) and there's nothing you can do about it. That's far too much money for me to risk throwing away.

    I understa...



    I know not all are 14 or that all of them change their minds. What I was presented with when I looked into adoption was the idea that the birth mother gets to choose whether or not I would be a good parent for her child (and I don't consider teens who have babies to be especially good decision makers, which many of the people presented in the discussion I was involved in were. On top of that, I've never won a popularity contest in my life, so I don't imagine anyone would pick me). And most, if not all of the birth mothers they were talking about were teens. Then, if "chosen" I would be expected to pay out up to $20,000 to the birth mother for her expenses (which I consider buying babies, which I thought was illegal in this country) over and above about the same amount for the legal and "administrative" costs involved. I was told I'd spend that much to have a baby of my own, to which I countered, I would not, since I have health insurance. (we're not talking cribs and diapers, which are not part of that expense) And then after all that, it is possible that the girl changes her mind (I had a cousin who did exactly that, which I think is a terrible thing to do to someone) and there's nothing you can do about it. That's far too much money for me to risk throwing away.

    I understand that not everyone is like that, and probably most people aren't. But I've seen it happen, and I know what sort of luck I usually have. Under those circumstances I can't afford to take that kind of chance. I think the girl/woman should make the decision before she gives up the child. They had nine months to make that decision. I know it's not an easy decision. But changing your mind after a child is adopted is playing with a lot of people's lives. And it's heartless, in my opinion.

    I'm sure the cases you hear about are few and far between. But all of the ones I've heard about have been judged in favor of the birth mom or dad.

    That's why we rescued a dog. The previous owners aren't going to come back and say they've changed their minds.
    (more)
  • Death F... FencerCat 2009/10/17 16:50:19
    Death Faerie
    When it comes to expenses, like the doctor, childbirth and counseling, yea, you should pay that, especially the childbirth, there is much risk in that, the girl is giving you her child for crying out loud. If you don't want to pay for expenses, you shouldn't adopt.

    As for birth moms, even teens getting to choose the parents, its their right, they are going through pregnancy and a painful delivery to give up their child..they should have the right to pick who their child goes to. Perhaps you are better off with a dog since you have such contempt for birth moms.
  • FencerCat Death F... 2009/10/17 17:44:36
    FencerCat
    I don't have contempt for birth moms. I have contempt for the way adoptions are done in this country. And why is someone getting pregnant who doesn't have insurance?
  • Death F... FencerCat 2009/10/17 17:49:59
    Death Faerie
    accidents happen, but if you can't afford the hospital bills, you shouldn't adopt, so let me see, you expect a birth mom to go through pregnancy and delivery, and not pay the hospital bills? You expect birth moms to not have a say where there child goes? Adoptive parents are screened, therefore, the birth mom's choices shouldn't put the child in danger. If they don 't choose you, they must have good reason...
  • Death F... FencerCat 2009/10/17 18:00:25 (edited)
    Death Faerie
    I've thought about it, its obvious from your response here that you think birth moms have no rights at all, our decisions are hard enough without having to deal with people like you. I wish there were a law that required adoptive parents to send pictures to birth moms, and letters...they risked their life to bring the child into the world, we deserve more rights, as of now the only right we have is to change our minds, therefore if we stick to our decision, we spend the rest of our lives wondering how our children are.

    Then to have people like you expect us to give our child up, have no contact..and pay the hospital bills?!!! Then you begrudgingly pay for necessities for the child...so you want birth moms to pay for those too...while never getting to see the child?

    You mam, are getting blocked. YOU have brought up painful memories. I miss my child more than ever.

    Oh..and you probably want abortion banned..therefore not giving WHOLE women any choices whatsoever. That's right, I said WHOLE. You want to be a bitch, well I will be too...you can't have kids of your own...mother nature is right here..you don't deserve to have children, you aren't even a completely woman since you can't even have empathy for birth moms. Someone should remove that poor dog from your home.

    There I'm being a bitch, a melodramatic bitch..but hey, if someone rubs a sore spot, I will react.

    Goodbye half woman
  • kitkat42 2009/10/16 22:33:18
    No
    kitkat42
    +3
    Not like they used to. Women have to prove just as much, in this day, that they are fit. My son got his two girls in custody fight.
  • *Storm* 2009/10/16 22:22:02
    No
    *Storm*
    +2
    it used to be true where all judges favored men but it's actually turning now. I know because I am a court officer and hear many of these cases.
  • mk, Smartass Oracle 2009/10/16 21:44:45

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