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Are people too quick to blame their parents for their problems?

Chole 2009/03/06 00:38:41
Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
No, bad parents can ruin your life
When people blame their parents for their problems...
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Although certain human traits can be traced back to your parents, holding them responsible for all your problems is merely making an excuse for not getting help. Being passive aggressive or possessing less than ideal characteristics may have been influenced by your parents but to willingly let them negatively affect your life is an even bigger tragedy. Do you think people are being too hasty when they blame their parents for all their problems?
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  • pizza nif 2010/05/13 21:32:50
    No, bad parents can ruin your life
    pizza nif
    +3
    Most of the people wo said yes have abviously had peachy childhoods. Bad parenting does shape how people will be for the rest of thier lives. But it's up to you to ubtrain yourself from whatever bullshiit you went through as a child. Its a hard thing to do but you'll need to do it so that you can grow into a happy and productive adult. Counselling helps.

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  • pizza nif 2010/05/13 21:32:50
    No, bad parents can ruin your life
    pizza nif
    +3
    Most of the people wo said yes have abviously had peachy childhoods. Bad parenting does shape how people will be for the rest of thier lives. But it's up to you to ubtrain yourself from whatever bullshiit you went through as a child. Its a hard thing to do but you'll need to do it so that you can grow into a happy and productive adult. Counselling helps.
  • chris 2010/04/03 21:33:36
    No, bad parents can ruin your life
    chris
    +1
    some parents shouldnt be allowed to have kids, especially jehovah witness parents
  • Illinois 2009/07/25 23:45:26
    No, bad parents can ruin your life
    Illinois
  • idlewild 2009/05/25 02:53:48
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    idlewild
    It seems we are way to quick to blame some one else parent or not no matter what the problem. It appears to be the American way.
  • Peanut Santiago 2009/05/19 10:19:20
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    Peanut Santiago
    Parents can and do cause many of their children's problems...but that does not mean it has to happen. *****Children from bad homes can turn out fine...and children from good homes can go bad. There is more going on than the suitability of the parent. There are also the personality and life choices of the children. ***** Children are a combination of nature and nurture...and the same set of parents can have children that turn out vastly different in behavior.
  • KarelAn... Peanut ... 2010/07/16 21:01:56
    KarelAndersenBalderas
    +3
    So true !!!! I believe just as you do and also thier are traits that run in families such as depressive disorders and anxiety disorders and sometimes these traits get passed down by no fault of the parent but by nature and the child who grows up with this traits should get the apporpriate help like most of the parents do ,they should'nt turn and tell the parent of all the things that affected them,and made them emotional, I took my child to counceling many times because she had the same emotional problems I did ,I did the best I could and now at 28 yrs of age she is basically blameing me ! I will always love her ,but I hope she wakes up and sees the whole picture and I hope she seeks help from a good psychologist and a book and tape by roy masters in which she is studying !
  • Michelle 2009/05/17 15:18:38
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    Michelle
    +1
    The United States has become a "blame" society! It is sooo easy for people NOT to take responsibility for their own actions. That is why are prisons/jails are overflowing because we want everything now, our way and the hell with anybody who stands in their way. Why work hard if you can just walk into your neighbor's home and take what you want? Our judiciary systems has become a "protection" for all criminals and shamed our victims. A prime example is the New Hate Crime Bill---this is the most inhumane, cold slap to people with God-Fearing Morals!
  • BillySteve Michelle 2009/05/17 16:01:35
    BillySteve
    +1
    Part of the "blame game" is to promote cultural marxism. If you can blame a member of an "oppressor class" it gets you off of the hook for taking as much initiative as you can to change your lot in life. Cultural Marxism leads to thinking of the world in terms of classes, and eventually you think of things in terms of class analysis, a habit of mind that makes Marxism seem natural and empowering (even if in reality Marxism is better at criticism than actually making things work).

    As someone who has taken the initiative, for example by cracking a book and learning a new skill that helped me get promoted at work, I can assure you that it's not THAT hard to change your life. It's something that takes time and isn't Instant Gratification.

    One martial arts instructor used to call some of his students "Instant On Americans". He was being ironic and being a good teacher. Humor can sometimes puncture the illusion of knowing that you know what is really going on.
  • Michelle BillySteve 2009/05/17 18:17:11
    Michelle
    I could not agree with you any more! Unfortunately for my children and theirs--society will be a horrible place to live if we continue down this morally corupt road!
  • BillySteve 2009/05/16 22:44:45
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    BillySteve
    +1
    Means that they haven't quite gotten hold of the idea that P&M; aren't around to ruin their lives any further.

    On the other hand, sorry, when a "parent" does thing sexual abuse, frequent verbal abuse, neglects their kids for drink and drugs, or teaches their kids stupid disruptive non-sense that makes it hard for them to achieve you can't just tell the adult "Get over it!". Changing one's life takes time.

    Sometimes the best parents can raise up horrors and sometimes the most evil parents can leave kids with a lot of inner resources. Depends.
  • Icarus326 2009/05/16 15:03:01
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    Icarus326
    +1
    Parents can be mostosities and certain problems can be rooted from overly strict parents, but too often I think people blame their parents to extract responsibility from themselves
  • Colbert 2009/05/13 20:55:22
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    Colbert
    +1
    Genetically or environmentally? I've met good and bad kids from good homes and bad homes. I've met good kids from foster homes. It's truly about both genetics and environment.
  • IndyLinda 2009/03/16 22:04:05
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    IndyLinda
    +1
    They just delay the day they outgrow it. Blame is just wanting an excuse and to escape responsibility.
  • kmay 2009/03/09 17:06:00 (edited)
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    kmay
    Parents for the most part [not talking about the abusive ones here] do not Create their kids problems, can not Control their kids problems, nor can they Cure their kids problems.

    Kids need to grow up and ask themselves - do they want their kids to treat them the way they treat their parents?

    If parents are responsible for all that is wrong in your life than they are also responsible for all that is right in your life!

    Love them while you have them, warts and all, just like they loved you - warts and all!!
  • KarelAn... kmay 2010/07/16 21:02:53
    KarelAndersenBalderas
    +2
    amen to that !!!
  • SkyBluePink 2009/03/06 17:46:36
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    SkyBluePink
    Your parents can only do so much. Then there are certain traits you may inherit from them. You do need to take responsibility at some point in your life. You are your own master.
  • CC 2009/03/06 16:56:00
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    CC
    +1
    Society accepts and even sometimes encourages kids to blame their parents for everything. I know girls that are 26-30 that continue to put blame on the parer all their short-comings. But, when do you say "ok thats enough, its time to grow up and take on your own responsibilties and end the bitterness. Its unhealthy for everyone involved.
  • DeePizzaGuy 2009/03/06 07:11:49
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    DeePizzaGuy
    See the movie Rocky Balboa when Rocky tells his son Rocky Junior that blaming Rocky senior for Junior not getting ahead in his life is bunk. That Rocky Junior will succeed from getting away from his father's shadow is to be willing to take the hits of life and keep moving forward.
  • Lexie 2009/03/06 03:21:22
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    Lexie
    People don't like to take responsibility for their actions. And it seems society helps them avoid the necessity too. If someone's a screwed up adult; it's the parents fault. If someone get's fat; it's McDonald's fault. It's the blame game, and we all play it.

    The reason I picked this option is because both of the others are true. Bad parents can ruin a kids life. But people are also quick to blame a parent for everything and need to get over punishments/whatever. Parents can unjustly punish kids, but they also justly punish them. In fact, most parents do a bit of both and you have to just get over it.
  • Michelle Lexie 2009/05/17 15:22:52
    Michelle
    Well...last time I checked....not a single Woman or Man ever had to take a test or apply for a license in regards to their moral issues, intelligence level, their work ethics, etc., in order to produce children! Some gene pools are producing some excellent young folks and others...well---how in the world can you blame a parent if there is no screening method for the blind leading the blind!
  • shadi 2009/03/06 03:07:13 (edited)
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    shadi
    Sure why not? It's easier to point a finger at someone and put the blame on them...
  • JadedTLC 2009/03/06 02:20:02
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    JadedTLC
    +1
    They are lame. Once you become an adult you have the FREE CHOICE to be whomever you want to be. Sure it might be tougher, but it's still choice.
  • Royal Warrior 2009/03/06 02:03:22
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    Royal Warrior
    +2
    The great thing about being human, is that we are more than our past or our genetics. I finally grew up and started to become the person I wanted to be, when I quit blaming anyone else for what and/or who I was.
    Now I only blame my parents for genetics, and then only in a joking way. It is their fault I am only 4'11. If my dad had been taller than HE is, he could have passed tall genes on to me, same with my mom. And don't tell me about their taller parents and siblings, I'm the one stuck being short. (and forget all the times I've used shortness to my advantage)
    But truly, even tho I had great parents and not much to get over, as such, I saw friends who got beyond a parents mental illness, a parent who let it be known that s/he would never have had this child had s/he known what s/he would turn out to be, one young man who made it to adult hood drug free, even tho both parents were users, etc. You can get beyond bad parenting, if you choose to and seek help, mentors and counseling.
    Oh, and the one kid above, whose parent said s/he wouldn't have birthed her/him, had s/he known ahead of time? S/he was in the top 10% of our graduating class, had scholarships dripping off the table, earned a healthy wage even before graduating, etc. The simple fact was that this teen wasn't a jock, didn't participate in winning teams, which participation the parents idolized to the point they couldn't see the good in the kid. Go figure.
  • 凸凹 2009/03/06 01:56:44
    When people blame their parents for their problems...
    凸凹
    +2
    ... it's valid, but it's still up to you if you choose to let it dictate your life.
  • Pop Patrol 2009/03/06 01:32:49
    No, bad parents can ruin your life
    Pop Patrol
    +2
    craziness runs in the fam. its not an excuse, its true.
  • Michelle Pop Patrol 2009/05/17 15:25:56
    Michelle
    aahh I didn't know this....so all of these idiots in jail/prisons, mental hospitals, special needs classes---Can we now sterilize them to prevent their offspring to inflict the rest of us??? Hmmmmm?
  • kevracer 2009/03/06 01:00:09
    Yes, parents can be tough but you can get over it
    kevracer

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