I Steal Pills!

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About Me

Just your average heiress with a great figure, hundreds of millions in the bank, and not a lot to say.

I have already met all the important people! Next question!

Shopping, flying around in our private plane, campaigning to restrict a woman's right to choose, stealing recipes and then claiming that I came up with them myself, dissing Michelle Obama, getting whistleblowers like Tom Gosinski fired.

Spending $750,000 a month on clothes and jewelry, plastic surgery, Botox, Restalyne, silicone, chin augmentation, cheek augmentation, otoplasty, chemical peels, blepharoplasty (the best!!)

I love it when John sings, "Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran" (to the tune of Barbara Ann). Also, I'm a huge fan of Nickelback!

John doesn't like me to watch TV.

Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed was great! And that Ben Stein is so cute!

John doesn't like me to read.

Once I playfully twirled John's hair and said, "You're getting a little thin up there." His face reddened, and he responded, "At least I don't plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you c*nt."

John McCain

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  • Will you Vote for Obama after your read this?

    +19 raves As you know, John has taken some mighty unpopular positions (reducing veterans' benefits, red... As you know, John has taken some mighty unpopular positions (reducing veterans' benefits, reducing soldiers' pay, cancelling education for GIs' etc) and there's no way he can win on the issues...so it's people like you spreading vicious lies who will really make a difference! We have to take focus away from John's flip-flops, his testy outbursts, and his going back on his word time and time again. Remember our slogan...torture secret muslim overturning Roe v Wade = President McCain! (more)

  • What Obama REALLY did in Afghanistan.

    +13 raves Your help with "low information voters" will be invaluable in the coming months. After... Your help with "low information voters" will be invaluable in the coming months. After all, since John has taken some unpopular positions like cutting veterans' pay, cancelling their health benefits, and making sure they don't get rest between combat deployments, his poll numbers have sunk. I'm so happy that you have chosen to post something that's an Urban Legend and has been debunked by snopes.com! Thanks again! (more)

  • Why is it that Obama gave a speech to 1000's of Germ... Why is it that Obama gave a speech to 1000's of Germans but can't be bothered to visit the troops that are stationed there? Guess he doesn't care about the troops after all. (more)

    +22 raves You can be sure when John visits Europe, they won't be cheering him on! They will be booing h... You can be sure when John visits Europe, they won't be cheering him on! They will be booing him! There's no better measure of an American leader than being hated by the whole world! You can rest assured that John will continue the Bush legacy...It will be a seamless transition as he will continue the Bush policies 100%. The only difference--and a big one it is--is the First Lady will be much prettier! As for the soldiers, it's like John said when he cut their benefites, WHO CARES!!! (more)
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