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BetaMaxevony 2012/05/06 04:35:23
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DIVORCE
AGREEMENT
--WRITTEN BY YOUNG COLLEGE
STUDENT--
30 STAR RATING:
The person that
wrote this is a college student.
Perhaps there
is hope for us after all.
DIVORCE
AGREEMENT
THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I
CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S BY A YOUNG PERSON, A
STUDENT!!!
WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR
HIM.



Dear
American liberals, leftists, social progressives,
socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al:




We have
stuck together since the late 1950's for the sake
of the kids, but the whole of this latest election
process has made me realize that I want a divorce.
I know we tolerated each other for many years for
the sake of future generations, but sadly, this
relationship has clearly run its
course.

Our two
ideological sides of America cannot and will not
ever agree on what Is right for us all, so let's
just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and
chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go
our own way.



Here is a
model separation agreement:



--Our two
groups can equitably divide up the country by
landmass each taking a similar portion. That will
be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides
can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it
should be relatively easy! Our respective
representatives can effortlessly divide other
assets since both sides have such distinct and
disparate tastes.



--We don't
like redistributive taxes so you can keep
them.



--You are
welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.--Since
you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms,
the cops, the NRA and

the
military.



--We'll
take the nasty, smelly oil industry and you can go
with wind, solar and
biodiesel.



--You can
keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. You
are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel
vehicle big enough to move all three of
them.



--We'll
keep capitalism, greedy corporations,
pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall
Street.

--You can
have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food
stamps, homeless, homeboys, hippies, druggies and
illegal aliens.



--We'll
keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and
rednecks.



--We'll
keep the Bibles and give you NBC and
Hollywood

--You can
make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain
the

right to
invade and hammer places that threaten
us.



--You can
have the peace-niks and war protesters. When our
allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll
help provide them security.

--We'll
keep our Judeo-Christian
values.



--You are
welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political
correctness and Shirley McClain. You can also have
the U.N. But we will no longer be paying the
bill.

--We'll
keep the SUV's, pickup trucks and oversized luxury
cars.

You can
take every Volt and Leaf you can
find.



--You can
give everyone healthcare if you can find any
practicing doctors.



--We'll
continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not
a right. However we will still help those in
need.



--We'll
keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" and "The
National Anthem."



--I'm sure
you'll be happy to substitute "Imagine", "I'd Like
to Teach the World to Sing", "Kum Ba Ya" or "We
Are the World".

--We'll
practice trickle down economics and you can
continue to give trickle up poverty your best
shot.

--Since it
often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our
name and our flag.

Would you
agree to this? If so, please pass it along to
other like-minded liberal and conservative
patriots and if you do not
agree,

just hit
delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll
bet you answer

which one
of us will need whose help in 15
years.

Sincerely,

John J.
Wall

Law
Student and an American

P.S. Also,
please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin &
Charlie Sheen, Barbara Streisand, & ( Hanoi )
Jane Fonda with you, and don’t forget Alec
Baldwin, Miley Cyrus, Lady
Gaga.

P.S.S. And
you won't have to press 1 for English when you
call our country.

Forward
This Every Time You Get It ! Let's Keep This
Going, Maybe Some Of It Will Start Sinking In.




IN GOD WE
TRUST
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