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What do you think should be the federal LGBT legislative priority in the next Congress?

DMCrawford 2008/08/05 11:21:45
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  • kmay 2008/08/05 13:51:36
    None of the above
    kmay
    All listed are un-necessary.
  • Friday 2008/08/05 12:29:31
    None of the above
    Friday
    The best agenda for the next Congress would be to devise a schedule that puts the congress in recess for 364 days a year, agenda congress devise schedule congress recess 364 days year for the next four years! Nothing good will happen in four years and nothing bad will happen! Sorta like what is happening now! What a huge financial savings however!
  • TBP 2008/08/05 11:52:29
    None of the above
    TBP
    +1
    Banning gay marriage.
  • kmay TBP 2008/08/05 13:51:53 (edited)
    kmay
    A scene at City Hall in San Francisco

    'Next.'

    'Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license.'

    'Names?'

    'Tim and Jim Jones.'

    'Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance.'

    'Yes, we're brothers.'

    'Brothers? You can't get married.'

    'Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?'

    'Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!'

    'Incest?' No, we are not gay.'

    'Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?'

    'For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other. Besides, we don't have any other prospects.'

    'But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've been denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you can get married to a woman.'

    'Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry a woman. I want to marry Jim.'

    'And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us just because we are not gay?'

    'All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next.'

    'Hi. We are here to get married.'

    'Names?'

    'John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson.'

    'Who wants to marry whom?'

    'We all want to marry each other.'

    'But there are four of you!'

    'That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert...'

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    A scene at City Hall in San Francisco

    'Next.'

    'Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license.'

    'Names?'

    'Tim and Jim Jones.'

    'Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance.'

    'Yes, we're brothers.'

    'Brothers? You can't get married.'

    'Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?'

    'Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!'

    'Incest?' No, we are not gay.'

    'Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?'

    'For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other. Besides, we don't have any other prospects.'

    'But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've been denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you can get married to a woman.'

    'Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry a woman. I want to marry Jim.'

    'And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us just because we are not gay?'

    'All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next.'

    'Hi. We are here to get married.'

    'Names?'

    'John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson.'

    'Who wants to marry whom?'

    'We all want to marry each other.'

    'But there are four of you!'

    'That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert, Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert loves June and me. All of us getting married together is the only way that we can express our sexual preferences in a marital relationship.'

    'But we've only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples.'

    'So you're discriminating against bisexuals!'

    'No, it's just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that it's
    just for couples.'

    'Since when are you standing on tradition?'

    'Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere.'

    'Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage to couples. The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor says the constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give us a marriage license!'

    'All right, all right. Next.'

    'Hello, I'd like a marriage license.'

    'In what names?'

    'David Deets.'

    'And the other man?'

    'That's all. I want to marry myself.'

    'Marry yourself? What do you mean?'

    'Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to marry the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return.'

    'That does it! I quit!! You people are making a mockery of marriage!!'
    (more)

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