Rowdy Cluckers: The Chick-fil-A Rebellion

By Doug Giles / 6 August 2012 / 8 Comments

Well,
the anti-Chick-fil-A thing sort of backfired, now didn’t it? Yep, the
rabid gay crowd thought they were going to shut CFA down, but instead
their fascist demands that Chick-fil-A’s Presidente Dan Cathy repent of
his free speech actually catapulted the fast food chain into record
profits. Cha-ching!

I have one word for that homo faux pas of trying to stifle a private
company’s free speech, it’s: Ahahaha. Boy, you guys really read the
pulse of the American people … Not.

Now, I will give the onerous gay activists this: Aside from the huge
boom in ammo sales since Obama was elected, their boycott of Chick-fil-A
actually spurred the first definitive economic stimulus of the Obama
era. Muchas gracias.

Look, I knew this anti-free speech/chicken sandwich protest was going
to go south when frickin’ Rahm Emanuel and Edwin Mah Lee got out in
front of it. They represent America about as much as I represent PETA. I
kept waiting for Mugatu from Zoolander to pop out and join them by
slaughtering live chickens in a Foghorn Leghorn outfit while dancing to
“Do You Really Want to Hurt Me” in front of some Chippendale boys. But,
alas! It didn’t happen. Who can I sue?

If there’s one thing I know about Americans it’s that they love
Chick-fil-A and free speech. I guess that would be two things. And
Americans peacefully showing up in the hundreds of thousands last
Wednesday to Chick-fil-A restaurants from sea to shining sea showed
anyone with a lick of sense that Americans are not quite ready to bow
and kiss the ring of a special interest group that wants to mitigate
other people’s rights to freedom of expression just because they don’t
kowtow to theirs.

Which brings me to this query: What’s up with this BS that we’ve got
to agree with someone’s view of gay sex before we can buy or sell
chicken sandwiches? When did that edict get passed? We’re damn close to
making Seinfeld’s Soup Nazi look like the most rosy, easygoing consommé
ladler around.

And finally, how come the gay activists got their national dander up
over Chick-fil-A’s exec not being down with Brad and Chad getting
engaged, yet I haven’t heard them say diddly squat about their
intentions to stage a national “Kiss In” at any American mosque or give
the hundreds of black pastors who vehemently oppose gay marriage the
same crap they’ve been giving Chick-fil-A. What’s the matter? You’re not
scared to take them on, are you? You’re not chicken, are you?

I think this past August 1st is a foretaste of what’s coming this
November 6th. It’s all about freedom for all, baby, and you dudes don’t
get it. But Americans do. And they showed up in droves and waited in hot
lines for hours to demonstrate they will not be bullied.