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OH NO!!! BARACK OBAMA IS STARTING HIS SECOND TERM!!!

Ozymandias 2013/01/21 21:52:57
OH NO!!! EVERYBODY RUN FOR THE HILLS!!! OUR FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT JUST BEGAN HIS SECOND TERM TODAY!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAAH!! WATCH OUT BEFORE HE TAKES ALL OUR GUNS AND GIVES THEM TO THE MEXICANS AND MUSLIMS BEFORE THEY INVADE AMERICA!!! HE PASSED THE DREAM ACT SO MIGRANT CHILDREN CAN GO TO COLLEGE AND CORRUPT OUR EDUCATION!!! BEWARE OF THOSE MEXICAN IMMIGRANTS COMING TO TAKE OUR JOBS AND PUT US ON RESERVATIONS WITH BLANKETS INFECTED WITH SMALL POX!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!

ALL I WANTED AFTER GRADUATING COLLEGE WAS TO DIG DITCHES, CLEAN WINDOWS, PICK LETTUCE, SWEEP STREETS, AND WASH DISHES!!! NOW I CAN’T, AND I’M SO SAD!!! BOO-HOO-HOO!! WATCH OUT FOR PORKCHOP PABLO, T-BONE TOMAS, AND POULTRY PEDRO BEFORE THEY STRIP THE HIDES OFF YOUR COWS AND PIGS, DESTROY THE FOOD SUPPLY AND BUILD RAILROADS THROUGH YOUR FARMS FOR MORE MEXICANS!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!

BARACK OBAMA WANTS TO ENFORCE SHARIA LAW SO THE CAMEL JOCKEYS CAN CONQUER THE UNITED STATES!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! HE KILLED OSAMA BIN LADEN SO HE’D HAVE NO COMPETITION!!! ALL THE EXPERTS KNOW BARACK OBAMA IS KENYAN AND NOT AMERICAN!!! HAWAII IS REALLY THE NAME OF A SMALL VILLAGE IN KENYA!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! HE’S REALLY A COMMIE SOVIET SPY NAMED BARACKSKY OBAMOVICH WANTING TO TAKE AWAY TRADITIONAL AMERICA LIKE BILL O’REILLY, ANN COULTER, AND FOX NEWS SAY!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!

WATCH OUT WHITE PEOPLE BEFORE WE FACE RETRIBUTION FOR SLAVERY!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! OBAMA WANTS US ALL TO MUSTER UP IN COTTON FIELDS EVERY MORNING AND SEND BLACK FOLKS TO LYNCH US IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT IF WE DON’T CONVERT TO ISLAM!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! WE’LL BE FORCED TO LIVE IN SEPARATE BUT EQUAL HOUSES!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!

EVERYBODY BUY AS MANY ASSAULT WEAPONS AS YOU CAN BECAUSE NOW THE DEER MIGHT SHOOT BACK AT US!!! WE CAN’T GIVE CRIMINALS ANYMORE AUTOMATIC WEAPONS, MAKE THE NRA RICHER, AND LET ALL THE GUNMAN MAKE THEIR VICTIMS GO AND FIND JESUS!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!

OUR MILITARY CAN NO LONGER PERFORM ITS DUTY BECAUSE GAYS CAN SERVE OPENLY IN THE ARMED FORCES!!!! BEWARE OF THOSE GAY AND LESBIAN SOLDIERS VICTIMIZING THE STRAIGHT ONES WHO RUN AROUND GRASPING THEIR ASSES TO AVOID BEING RAPED!!! THE STRAIGHT ONES CAN’T FOLLOW ORDERS OR OPERATE ARTILLERY ANYMORE BECAUSE THEY'VE ALL BEEN CURSED BY GAY VOODOO MICROWAVES!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! HOMOSEXUALITY IS MAKING THEM CONSORT WITH AL-QAIDA NOW!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!

WHITE PEOPLE, REDNECKS, AND HILLBILLIES WE’RE ALL SCREWED NOW THAT BARACK OBAMA SUPPORTS GAY MARRIAGES AND ABORTIONS!!!! HE WANTS WHITE WOMEN TO ABORT ALL THEIR CHILDREN WHILE THE MEN CUT THEIR NUTS OFF AND ALL GROW OVARIES!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! HE ENDED THE BUSH TAX CUTS AND STOPPED GIVING TAX BREAKS TO THE MILLIONAIRES AND BILLIONAIRES!!! DON’T YOU KNOW IT’S OUR NATIONAL DUTY TO THROW THEM GOLDEN PARACHUTES AND SUPPORT THEIR LAVISH LIFESTYLES? AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!

HE’S USING OUR TAX DOLLARS TO SUPPORT OBAMACARE TO KEEP EVERYONE HEALTHY!!! THE INSURANCE AND PHARMACEUTICAL COMPANIES HAVE TO DO THEIR JOBS NOW AND NOT DENY ANYONE COVERAGE!!! BARACK OBAMA IS SO CRUEL AND MEAN BECAUSE HE’S MAKING THEM AND CONGRESS DO THEIR JOBS!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! IT’S ALL A CONSPIRACY BECAUSE ALEX JONES SAYS SO!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!! YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS FOLKS!!! AAAAH!!! AAAAAH!!! AAAAH!!!
You!
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  • andrew.micheals.353 2013/04/07 13:41:28
    andrew.micheals.353
    +1
    So funny.
  • Ozymandias andrew.... 2013/04/07 15:38:07
  • BritPunk 2013/04/07 12:37:32
    BritPunk
    +1
    Oh noes!!
  • Ozymandias BritPunk 2013/04/07 15:39:01
  • BlunderWoman ~ FTGOP~ BN 0 2013/02/01 03:43:44 (edited)
    BlunderWoman ~ FTGOP~ BN 0
    +1
    AAAAAAAAAAAaaamen! In trying times such as these, I like to comfort myself by listening to the Tea Party Theme Album on my American-made, iPod-compatible listening walkman - uh, device...contraption...thingy... you know what I mean!



  • Ozymandias Blunder... 2013/02/01 03:50:19 (edited)
  • Blunder... Ozymandias 2013/02/01 03:55:47
    BlunderWoman ~ FTGOP~ BN 0
    +2
    Totally! I dream of the day when my ova are stamped with a big 'ol "Property of the US of A" label. If you have to be a second-class citizen, you should be thankful you're a second-class citizen in AMERICA. And don't you forget it!
  • Ozymandias Blunder... 2013/02/01 03:59:16
  • Blunder... Ozymandias 2013/02/01 04:31:46 (edited)
    BlunderWoman ~ FTGOP~ BN 0
    +1
    *Lolz.*

    No, because you would only "own" my vagina if I'm on welfare. Or if I'm covered by the same health insurance group coverage plan as you, and I take birth control pills.

    Of course, since those situations apparently give you the "right" to own my vagina, it's not "legitimate" rape. Being on birth control means I am a "slut" because you're technically paying for me to have sex, so then that would make me a hooker and you would be a "john"...or at least I should have to post videos online so you could be watch them. (Ew!!!)

  • Ozymandias Blunder... 2013/02/01 04:59:19
  • Blunder... Ozymandias 2013/02/01 06:29:03 (edited)
    BlunderWoman ~ FTGOP~ BN 0
    +1
    In all seriousness, how can people even THINK those are reasonable things to say? What is wrong with them?!
  • Ozymandias Blunder... 2013/02/01 16:02:32
  • Blunder... Ozymandias 2013/02/01 16:42:00
    BlunderWoman ~ FTGOP~ BN 0
    +1
    That's even more terrifying. I just don't know!
  • Jay Theyme 2013/01/23 09:08:56
    Jay Theyme
    You don't have to worry about most of those things because Republicans have enough power to negate (some or many) of those things,
    however,
    the problem is actually something a lot more dangerous.
    Something far more frightening to those who know,
    Your REAL problem is actually more nefarious, more evil and its this:
    ...The USA becoming, slowly, incrementally, irrelevant.
    Simply becoming an irrelevant has-been.
    You probably had your last chance to reverse that. But in 4 meandering, pointless, Obama-ish years you are (almost certainly) just far enough along the slope that you won't ever come back.
    And I tell you this 'slow decline into irrelevance' is the most dangerous because it happens slowly and with whimper. Nobody is too alarmed. Nobody really notices.
    Rome did something like that. The USA will become 4 years closer.
  • Ozymandias Jay Theyme 2013/01/23 10:12:18
  • Jay Theyme Ozymandias 2013/01/23 10:25:32
    Jay Theyme
    The USA isn't building and empire in the Middle-East. It's desperately trying to stop a worldwide Jihad and Islamic Terrorism,
    however,
    None of that has anything to do with what I'm warning you about. Irrelevance. A President who has done little or nothing in 4 years but take on petty progressive issues, Inspire nobody, Malaise, not so much a 'lack of respect' from the growing nations like China but almost an amused pity.
    An economy where 8% unemployment is your 'new normal' and Canada is the 'hot commodity' in North America.
    Increasing irrelevance. 4 more years and there is a kind of 'tipping point' you will barely feel at all. But it will have happened.
  • Ozymandias Jay Theyme 2013/01/23 11:34:03
  • Jay Theyme Ozymandias 2013/01/23 11:41:16
    Jay Theyme
    Oh was it this 7.9 kind of unemployment rate your happy about?
    Listen, those are not good numbers but they will be your numbers from now and decades to come.

    Yes, its true that congress won't be able to get much done with Obama blocking everything.

    Why would I live in Canada if I'm so damn conservative? Well we are conservative here and we grew a conservative movement a few years ago. It was successful and now Canada has a Conservative Majority.
    *this is a New Conservative party which sort of took over the old moderate/liberal conservatives.
    Anyways, big news is our conservative PM made some massive deals with China and still more going on about a pipeline that won't need to go through the USA (since Obama paid off environmentalists by killing a pipeline),
    so,
    Yeah.. China. Canada. Very very big international business with those two hotshots.
    Oh well.. remember the USA used to be the 'big deal' eh? Oh well.. they had their glory years.
  • Ozymandias Jay Theyme 2013/01/23 11:47:59
  • Jay Theyme Ozymandias 2013/01/23 12:13:26
  • Ozymandias Jay Theyme 2013/01/23 12:20:06
  • Jay Theyme Ozymandias 2013/01/23 20:16:31
    Jay Theyme
    'Gay marriage' is actually a proposition that is asking me 'for something' which is to 'approve' and give out a kind of special license. It actually is my business.
    A new pipeline is 'less danger to the water supply' but can make enough of that $$$$$$$$$$ to build a helluva lot of hospitals, city water plants and hire emergency personal.

    But all of this is beside our point here. We could go on for days having fights over every left-wing liberal policy you love,
    but,
    The real conversation here isn't about the USA collapsing or an Obama 'apocalypse'.
    It's just about a weakened USA that is becoming increasingly irrelevant in the world.
    You might like that. 51% of the USA seemed to like this enough to vote this do-nothing in again.
  • Ozymandias Jay Theyme 2013/01/23 22:52:59
  • Jay Theyme Ozymandias 2013/01/24 01:37:43
    Jay Theyme
    More hurtful suggestions from you and a misunderstanding of what is going on but just to touch on this:
    - Green energy is now too expensive. (in the future it may come down) but for now - gas and oil are definitely our CHEAPEST source of energy.
    Or put it this way: We CAN use wind turbines. Yes. But now your kid's hospital visit is $400 more. So is the cost of keep his medicine in your fridge and your home warm etc etc.
    Got that?
    Gay marriage is my business because it is actually 'Adam and Steve' ASKING ME to 'do something'.
    They are ASKING ME for an 'acknowledgment' and to spend some taxes broadening marriage privileges to them.
    Its 'my business' because Adam and Steve are actually saying 'Hey.. make this YOUR business?'.

    The USA most definitely DID have a financial collapse. It was a 'mortgage bubble' and while Clinton and most Democrats are to blame - actually yes Republicans can share blame too,
    however,
    That is not the problem here now.
    The actual problem is that you voted in a President who inherits the recovery and does..... what?
    Ensures it was the SLOWEST recovery (so far rivaling the Great Depression) and maybe THE slowest ever.

    As for the Tea Party. They won. At least a minor victory of sorts. They replaced a lot of Republicans with 'Tea party Faves...


    More hurtful suggestions from you and a misunderstanding of what is going on but just to touch on this:
    - Green energy is now too expensive. (in the future it may come down) but for now - gas and oil are definitely our CHEAPEST source of energy.
    Or put it this way: We CAN use wind turbines. Yes. But now your kid's hospital visit is $400 more. So is the cost of keep his medicine in your fridge and your home warm etc etc.
    Got that?
    Gay marriage is my business because it is actually 'Adam and Steve' ASKING ME to 'do something'.
    They are ASKING ME for an 'acknowledgment' and to spend some taxes broadening marriage privileges to them.
    Its 'my business' because Adam and Steve are actually saying 'Hey.. make this YOUR business?'.

    The USA most definitely DID have a financial collapse. It was a 'mortgage bubble' and while Clinton and most Democrats are to blame - actually yes Republicans can share blame too,
    however,
    That is not the problem here now.
    The actual problem is that you voted in a President who inherits the recovery and does..... what?
    Ensures it was the SLOWEST recovery (so far rivaling the Great Depression) and maybe THE slowest ever.

    As for the Tea Party. They won. At least a minor victory of sorts. They replaced a lot of Republicans with 'Tea party Faves' and then 'Tea Partified' Romney.
    The results were they gained a few % overall vote and Obama lost a little.
    Oh sure.. not enough to win the Presidency but actually considering a 'step to the right' and 'Tea Partying' Romney and they GAINED a few %.
    Not bad all things considered.
    (more)
  • Ozymandias Jay Theyme 2013/01/24 02:52:59
  • illinoyed Jay Theyme 2013/01/25 15:06:41
    illinoyed
    +3
    "Gay marriage' is actually a proposition that is asking me 'for something' which is to 'approve' and give out a kind of special license. It actually is my business."

    No it's not. Rights are not yours to give, one group of citizens doesn't have the power to grant or withhold rights from other citizens. Civil rights proved that.
  • Augure3VI Jay Theyme 2013/02/01 04:33:14
  • Augure3VI Jay Theyme 2013/02/01 04:18:48
  • Lunacat 2013/01/23 01:54:55
    Lunacat
    +3
    LMAO!!!

    zomg run
  • Ozymandias Lunacat 2013/01/23 05:32:32
  • Crank_It_Up 2013/01/23 01:23:03
    Crank_It_Up
    +2
    LOL, too funny, and I really liked the all caps, but you forgot to add that obama wants to nuke all the white countries

    Sadly, too many sodaheads will miss the sarcasm.
  • Ozymandias Crank_I... 2013/01/23 05:32:52
  • melly~thwarting Satan since... 2013/01/23 01:15:33
  • Che Gue... melly~t... 2013/01/23 01:35:43
    Che Guevara - Hero
    +3
    I love the graphics. lol
  • melly~t... Che Gue... 2013/01/23 02:02:43 (edited)
    melly~thwarting Satan since 1971
    +5
    My faves, lol. thanks obama guy with hose gif thanks obama guy with hose gif
  • Ozymandias melly~t... 2013/01/23 05:33:49
  • Ozymandias Che Gue... 2013/01/23 05:33:18
  • Ozymandias melly~t... 2013/01/23 05:33:08
  • melly~t... Ozymandias 2013/01/23 06:29:19
    melly~thwarting Satan since 1971
    +3
    It's hilarious, love. Perfection.

    Thanks for letting me know.
  • Ozymandias melly~t... 2013/01/23 10:12:56
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