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British Schools Ban Best Friends: Are Best Friends Healthy?

News 2012/04/27 13:00:00
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A handful of primary (elementary) schools in south London are reportedly discouraging kids from having best friends and attempting to get them to interact in larger groups. Though The Sun, a major British tabloid, is calling the policy a "ban," it's unclear to what extent schools are taking it. Educational psychologist Gaynor Sbuttoni says the schools are enforcing the policy to "save the child the pain of splitting up from their best friend."

Obviously, the policy has been met with severe criticism. Campaign for Real Education spokesman Chris McGovern explained, "Children take things very seriously and if you tell them they can’t have a best friend it can be seriously damaging to them. They need to learn about relationships." A member of the National Association of Head Teachers added, "I don’t think it is widespread but it is clearly happening. It seems bizarre." Do you think having a best friend is a healthy part of growing up?


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Top Opinion

  • Beat Magnum True Hero 2012/04/27 14:46:02 (edited)
    Yes
    Beat Magnum True Hero
    +37
    Has it ever occurred to anyone that there are some people who do not want to be friends with large groups? Being an introvert or not wanting to have a huge group of acquaintances is not a bad thing. Neither is being outgoing and overly social. Quit treating the people who don't want to be parts of big groups as freaks. Some of us feel the life getting sucked out of us if more than 10 people are in a room. I have good friends, I get along with everyone, but under the pain of being expelled, I would have told a teacher or school administrator to go to hell before giving up my best friend.

    All of the rules change the minute high school ends anyway. All of those "acquaintances" that they want these kids to have? They'll be gone from their lives 2 months after graduation. I'm still in touch with my best friends from high school and most of the time, they're closer than my actual family.

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Opinions

  • john doe Grammar... 2012/04/30 09:29:42
    john doe
    +1
    A little quote from dune...." fear is the mind killer "
  • ZERO 2012/04/28 02:28:05
  • Smuwf, ... ZERO 2012/04/28 10:10:03
    Smuwf, Twin
    +1
    Well said :) I drifted from my best friend,a few years ago. He moved to the phillipines,he moved back recently ans we're bestfriends as if those years never happened. Your totally right,friendship is vital to growing up,without friends,who would pick you up in the schoolyard when you fell? Who would laugh with you,share there lunch with you? Nobody...the ban they want is almost dictatorship in nature
  • abubincrazy 2012/04/28 02:23:44
    Yes
    abubincrazy
    +1
    I ban British schools.
    Wanking sods, that lot!
  • Wolf97 2012/04/28 02:13:08
    Yes
    Wolf97
    +1
    While they will most likely split from their elementary best friend as they grow up, once they get to Highschool they can sometimes last a lifetime. Discouraging it when they are young may cheat them out of someone who has their back no matter what.
  • Wizard 2012/04/28 01:47:00
    Yes
    Wizard
    +2
    That is so oppressive and harsh. If my kids were there, I would switch schools immediately.
  • Aaron's Girl 2012/04/28 01:42:47
    Yes
    Aaron's Girl
    +2
    I couldn't live without them!
  • The Mosher 2012/04/28 01:40:40
    Yes
    The Mosher
    +2
    How do you ban best friends? lol
  • Smuwf, ... The Mosher 2012/04/28 10:12:08
    Smuwf, Twin
    By being an arsehole with a doctorate and important friends :)
  • Eliot Loney 2012/04/28 01:26:29
    Yes
    Eliot Loney
    +2
    Best friend are an assential part of a childs psychological growth, I only had one true friend or best friend growing up, the others where merely acquaintances that I had to interact with on occasion while at school.
  • Fashionable60s 2012/04/28 01:25:53
    Yes
    Fashionable60s
    +2
    Being an individualist since a very young child, I gravitated towards the same type of person, one at a time, never part of a large group, ever. To this day, I am kind of a square peg in a round hole world. No regrets.
  • Andrea 2012/04/28 01:23:26
    Yes
    Andrea
    +2
    So is breaking up with a friend and getting your heart broken. You can not expect kids to live their lives having everything perfect. They HAVE to learn disappointments.
  • dennisg40 2012/04/27 23:51:27
    No
    dennisg40
    +2
    You cannot ban someone having a "best friend" just through a ban because people will have them anyway. The British government has been so stupid as to allow Muslims come into their country and now they have been conned into allowing Sharia law in the UK. How much more stupid can you get?
  • Smuwf, ... dennisg40 2012/04/28 10:14:35
    Smuwf, Twin
    +1
    What does Islam have do with childhood friends? One of my best friends is muslim, no problems so far :/
  • Jan Haskell 2012/04/27 23:47:13
    Yes
    Jan Haskell
    +3
    Of course they are! Being sad if one should move away is also a part of life. We should let these things develop naturally and quit micromanaging every aspect of life.
  • denny 2012/04/27 23:38:52
    Yes
    denny
    +3
    odummer wishes he had one
  • angel face 2012/04/27 23:27:48
    Yes
    angel face
    +3
    I dont see why it wouldnt be healthy. And you can always have more than one best friend but that special one makes all the difference. Its stupid
  • Diane Davie 2012/04/27 22:51:59
    Yes
    Diane Davie
    +1
    Beware of moves like this to ban best friends. It is possibly a strategy of 'the powerful' behind the government to block alliances at an early age. Conspiracy theory? Maybe, but good to keep a look out for their incursions into our lives.
  • nightcrawler2005 2012/04/27 22:31:54
    Yes
    nightcrawler2005
    +4
    Having a best friend is extremely healthy and normal.

    A psychologist is pushing this so don't forget two thirds of all psychologists went into the profession to figure out their own problems so maybe this is one of her deep rooted problems. Maybe she had no friends and nobody liked her at school.
  • Sayer Stewart 2012/04/27 22:31:35 (edited)
    Yes
    Sayer Stewart
    +2
    These schools should ban themselves.
    schools ban
  • El Prez 2012/04/27 22:29:15
  • Smuwf, ... El Prez 2012/04/28 10:19:35
    Smuwf, Twin
    Hey teacher...LEAVE THOSE KIDS ALONE! All in all your just a-notha brick in the wall "queue epic guitar" pink floyd rocks
  • El Prez Smuwf, ... 2012/04/28 19:35:26
    El Prez
    +1
    You're right about that!!!!
  • Splashstorm 2012/04/27 22:15:19
    Yes
    Splashstorm
    +2
    to discourage best friends is to discourage getting close to anyone. you can have more than 1 best friend y'know..
  • You Know IT 2012/04/27 22:14:56 (edited)
    Yes
    You Know IT
    +2
    having a best friend teaches you thing, even if it ends in a bloody mess you learn things, going through life without someone to talk to who is close to you who isn't family definitely helps. Even if your stabbed in the back by your "best friend" you learn to recover from it, you learn that stuff like that doesn't mean your whole world ends.

    i'm someone who likes to have a small group of close friends opposed to a large groups of no bodies , plus having many friends opposed to a small group of friends really leads to many dramatic things and then it's time to pick a side, lower chances of that happening with a group of close friends, though i have a few groups of friends they all get along so it's fine
  • ~Adrien~ 2012/04/27 22:10:16
    Yes
    ~Adrien~
    +2
    I had a different best friend in every grade growing up. . .
  • uninfor... ~Adrien~ 2012/04/28 00:12:29
    uninformedluddite
    +1
    You need to be marched to a re-education camp right now.
  • Tree To... ~Adrien~ 2012/04/28 00:30:58
    Tree Top TT
    +2
    Can I be your 2nd best friend?
  • jubil8 BN-0 PON 2012/04/27 22:04:28
    Yes
    jubil8 BN-0 PON
    +2
    My BF and I have been so over 60 years. I consider myself very lucky.
  • Tree To... jubil8 ... 2012/04/28 00:32:54
    Tree Top TT
    +1
    Let me guess... You married your BF?
  • jubil8 ... Tree To... 2012/04/28 05:13:45
    jubil8 BN-0 PON
    +1
    I didn't even think of that. Nope, My BF is a woman. But I like your idea a lot. :)
  • Hannah 2012/04/27 22:01:01
    No
    Hannah
    I wouldn't say so incase that friend moves u would be devistated so no but don't take my word for it I don't really no
  • Smuwf, ... Hannah 2012/04/28 10:22:51
    Smuwf, Twin
    My greatest friend( I met him in playschool at 4 years of age) moved to a seperate continent for almost ten years,he moved back about 2 years ago we are still as close as ever
  • Hannah Smuwf, ... 2012/04/28 17:50:11
    Hannah
    Well I told y'all I don't really know so why comment about it?
  • Josh St... Hannah 2012/04/28 11:04:03
    Josh Stephens
    That's just over protecting children from life. People have lived for many years without someone telling them they shouldn't form close bonds with one another in case one of you has to move. Under your statement, people should never get married... What if your spouse gets cancer and dies? You'd be devastated...
  • Hannah Josh St... 2012/04/28 17:51:58
    Hannah
    well you're right but a best friend is the one that you mainly hang out with all the time id rather have the same friend every month than for the rest of my life
  • Smuwf, ... Hannah 2012/05/03 07:52:48
    Smuwf, Twin
    I commented because I could :)
  • Hannah Smuwf, ... 2012/05/05 03:33:27
    Hannah
    That's rude. I didn't know. I have thing to do in life than read that description either way I'm right!
  • Smuwf, ... Hannah 2012/05/09 21:22:35
    Smuwf, Twin
    My apologys if you took offence,it was not intended.
  • raeven msbehavin 2012/04/27 21:35:21
    Yes
    raeven msbehavin
    +1
    The reason for the "ban" is actually to stimulate both parents and teachers to take a closer look at children's relationships to others. Too many children are cliquey, stand-offish about accepting the different or too influenced by those with questionable intentions. This discussion is designed to address those issues as well as the larger issue of bullying itself.

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