A rabbi, a priest and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks, "What? Is this a joke?"

jitko 2009/10/20 22:38:49
No! Don't tell me what to!
Here goes. Get ready to stich your side.
Add Photos & Videos
Tell us your best corny (and clean) joke!
Add a comment above

Sort By
  • Most Raves
  • Least Raves
  • Oldest
  • Newest

  • Brian S 2010/06/07 05:03:47
    Here goes. Get ready to stich your side.
    Brian S
    Young Dave, moved to Texas and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.

    The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry son,but I have some bad news, the donkey died.'

    Dave, replied,'Well, then just give me my money back.'

    The farmer said,'Can't do that. I went and spent it already.'

    Dave said,'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'

    The farmer asked,'What ya gonna do with him?

    Dave said,'I'm going to raffle him off.'

    The farmer said,'You can't raffle off a dead donkey!'

    Dave said,'Sure I can Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'

    A month later, the farmer met up with Dave and asked, 'What happened with that dead donkey?'

    Dave said,'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a piece and made a profit of $898.00.'

    The farmer said,'Didn't anyone complain?'

    Dave said,'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.'

    Dave now works for the government.
  • jitko Brian S 2010/06/08 18:12:55
    Would be funny, if not so close to the truth! :-)

    Here's one my cousin wrote a few days ago:

    Q: How many politicians does it take to fix a problem?

    A: None of them!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing a joke, Brian S!
  • neville 2009/10/21 20:40:58
    Here goes. Get ready to stich your side.
    So there was an Italian, an American and a Pollock and they were getting ready to go out into the desert. Each one was alowd 1 item. The Italian said "I'm bringing sausage, so if we get hungry we'll have something to eat"
    The American says"I'm bringing water, so if we get thirsty we'll have something to drink" And then the Pollock says "I'm bringing a cardoor, so if we get hot we can roll down the window"
  • jitko neville 2009/10/21 22:29:18
    :-) Pretty good! Thanks! :-)
  • neville jitko 2009/10/22 02:18:16
    My dad always tells me that one. It was kind of funny the first time.
  • NieNie 2009/10/20 23:02:20
    No! Don't tell me what to!
    *glomps the bartender* PUPPY!!!!! XD
  • jitko NieNie 2009/10/21 00:48:46 (edited)
    As your mother I DEMAND you tell a joke! "NO!" is not an option for you, little Missy!
  • NieNie jitko 2009/10/25 03:55:56
    ok.... whats brown and sticky?
  • jitko NieNie 2009/10/25 14:43:40
    a stick. try again.
  • NieNie jitko 2009/10/25 19:05:51
    .............. um....... what do you get when you cross a bird, a car, and a dog?
  • jitko NieNie 2009/10/26 00:05:35
    i dunno. what?
  • NieNie jitko 2009/10/26 01:09:17 (edited)
    a flying car-pet! that better?
  • jitko NieNie 2009/10/26 13:03:08
    yes, thank you.
  • NieNie jitko 2009/10/29 01:45:28
    pretty lame, huh?
  • No! Don't tell me what to!
    ☺☻The Ultimate Happy Pill☻☺
    I just wanted to say this. PEEENGUIIINNN!!!! -glomps the penguin-

See Votes by State

The map above displays the winning answer by region.

News & Politics

2016/02/10 10:54:30

Hot Questions on SodaHead
More Hot Questions

More Community More Originals