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raves +1 posted Oct 30, 2008 09:20PM GMT
Answered None of the above
He was brilliant, crazy, talented, genius, violent, passionate, emotionally unavailable, bi-polar, manic, inspiring, illogical. A person with his own demons and flaws. His mistakes shaped my life in good and bad ways. His love and talents gave me hope and inspiration. I wish he was sane enough to have a relationship with now. -
raves +1 posted Oct 29, 2008 11:44PM GMT
Answered None of the above
My father was amazing, he did some serious damage, he was just a regular old dad, he was a genius, he could do anything. He exposed us to the world, he taught us to think, he was a strict discliplinarian and he believed in spanking, but he never struck us in anger. He and my mom gave us a brilliant pattern for marriage and parenting, and I will be forever grateful. -
raves +1 posted Oct 29, 2008 08:28PM GMT (edited)
Answered My dad did some serious damage. (Abuse/left)
My dad is an alcoholic... i haven't talked to him in a year and i haven't seen him in 2 years. my brother wont talk to him and also hasn't seen him in 2 years. i can't talk to him because as soon as i hear his voice i start crying even if he just leaves me a voice mail. he is a liar and would rather go party with his friends then be with his kids. i want to tell him how much i hate him but i can't..... he changes his phone number alot and will never tell me where he is or who he is living with. i can't really ask my grandparents where he is because they would probably lie to me. he doesn't pay child support. he has thretened to fight my step dad if he ever saw him.................. when i do talk to him he acts like he didn't do anthing wrong and doesn't take responsability for himself... he needs to grow up....he still thinks he's 21 when he's 40. when i see my step dad call his kids every night just to say good night and i love you.... it makes me wish my dad was "normal" ............ i can't even trust my dad
your dad is just one of those people who should never break your heart
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raves +1 posted Oct 29, 2008 04:01PM GMT
Answered My dad did some serious damage. (Abuse/left)
My dad left when I was five and my sister was three. We rarely heard from him unless he was drunk and feeling sorry for his pathetic behavior. I learned how to be my own man without him through focusing my mind on hobbies and interests beyond drugs, booze, and criminal activities.
Thankfully, I had a wonderful old uncle and a grandmother who loved me so much that I knew what unconditional love was and this inspired me to trust people and understand that I am simply the reflection of what is in my heart. The better I am to others, the better the world is to me.
My father died several years ago in the hospital. Two days before he died, a cold-hearted relative called me to say my father needed to see me. He really didn't ask for me, it was simply his sister's feeling guilty themselves for how he and they treated my sister and I as outcasts our entire lives. They would have felt better if I came to forgive him for not being a father. I struggled with that request. The good man inside me wanted to go and forgive him, but the kid who waited for over 40 years just could not spend $2,000 to fly across country the next day; my own kids need my support.
The incident drove me to the computer to start typing my life's story and I literally typed every free minute I had for m...My dad left when I was five and my sister was three. We rarely heard from him unless he was drunk and feeling sorry for his pathetic behavior. I learned how to be my own man without him through focusing my mind on hobbies and interests beyond drugs, booze, and criminal activities.
Thankfully, I had a wonderful old uncle and a grandmother who loved me so much that I knew what unconditional love was and this inspired me to trust people and understand that I am simply the reflection of what is in my heart. The better I am to others, the better the world is to me.
My father died several years ago in the hospital. Two days before he died, a cold-hearted relative called me to say my father needed to see me. He really didn't ask for me, it was simply his sister's feeling guilty themselves for how he and they treated my sister and I as outcasts our entire lives. They would have felt better if I came to forgive him for not being a father. I struggled with that request. The good man inside me wanted to go and forgive him, but the kid who waited for over 40 years just could not spend $2,000 to fly across country the next day; my own kids need my support.
The incident drove me to the computer to start typing my life's story and I literally typed every free minute I had for many weeks just to cover my life up to my 18th year and then I stopped. Since then, I have been a writer. I don't write for money or fame; but simply to enhance thinking and I see many of you young people are learning to do this. The computer has made many things possible; but make sure you get outside in the air and do something in the real world with other real people. The world needs hands more than words, so take your ideas and build something, anything, for anyone. Just do it for the world and not yourself and watch what happens.
Thanks dad for not being there, you would have killed my hopes and dreams with your greed and selfishness.
If you want a different musical experience, check out a dead man named Jim Capaldi. his wife left him a beautiful tribute site http://www.jimcapaldi.com/. There is a message in his music, I hope you find it.(less) -
raves +1 posted Oct 27, 2008 02:47PM GMT
Answered My dad did some serious damage. (Abuse/left)
I guess you could say my father was the kind of parent you hope your child DOESN'T have. He abused my mother and I. Gambled all of our money away until we lost evertything, even our house. He even flew to Texas to meet a woman from the internet, while my mother was home with my younger sister and I, with no heat or food, in the middle of winter. My sister lives with him, in New Jersey, with his new wife and son. Within the last 5 years, I can count on less then both hands the amount of times that I have spoken with him. And that is even including text messages. He never calls, texts or even e-mails me. When my mother called him this past Christmas week, to yell at him for not calling me on my birthday, he told her he simply "forgot." I never heard him say it, but I heard my mother yelling at him on the phone. She was like "How the f*ck do you forget your first borns 21st birthday?" And then she went on to tell him how much of a piece of sh*t he is, and so on. Needless to say, the rest of my night was awful, and I thoroughly enjoyed the fact that my mother was letting me get drunk at home that night. I will be 22 years old the day after Christmas. My parents divorced when I was 15, seperated when I was 11 and started fighting and having major problems before I was even 5. My childhood was horrible. The sad thing is, my stepfather is as bad as my dad, but in different ways. Kind of makes me not like men so much. :/ -
raves +1 Oct 27, 2008 11:12PM GMTI have numerous reasons not to trust men. Between my father, stepfather, strangers, boyfriends... For a while there, everyone thought I was going to "go les." Then I had to explain to my mom that I can't just flip a switch that makes me full on lesbian, instead of just bisexual. She's funny sometimes.
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raves +1 Oct 28, 2008 04:20PM GMTdon't feel that way.. all men are individuals. I found a wonderful man in my mid 20s who is the complete opposite of my father. When my parents divorced I didn't realize how much I needed attention and how little I expected from guys. I became promiscuous and anorexic and was a mess.
When I met my husband he was hurt that I wouldn't recognize who he was b/c i was comparing him to my dad and my fears were projected. I realized that it wasn't fair to him and that I would be alone if I didn't learn to trust. I know it is hard though, but if you find someone right, you will know it and you will have to fight to leave the past behind. -
raves +2 Oct 29, 2008 01:37PM GMTI agree. I am just having issues finding that right guy or girl. I have a really hard time trusting people and letting them get close to me. So instead of getting the more steady, long-term relationship I want, I always end up with Mr. or Ms. Right Now. And because of my past problems and problems that I am having now, I'm not always the easiest chick to get along with. Or so I've heard. I try to be so nice and stuff all the time though. I have issues with expressing my feelings at the wrong place and at the wrong time. Like lately I have been taking a lot of my anger out on my boyfriend. And I feel awful for it. I mean, we have been having a lot of issues too, so we've been fighting. But it is just putting me in a horrible mood 24/7 and I am just bitching at him left and right. :(
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raves Oct 29, 2008 06:21PM GMTyeah, you don't want to misdirect your anger.. anger has its place, but it doesn't feel very good to be on the recieving end of it esp. when you aren't the root of it. I think in the beginning of my relationship w/my husband I made him ashamed of being male. I learned to appreciate him and his particular type of maleness that now is not a threat to me. Everyone deserves to be treated as an individual and it was really my desire not to hurt him anymore that made me overcome my insecurities.. I learned to compartmentalize my anger and fear.. and I stopped talking to my father which helped tremendously.
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raves +1 Oct 31, 2008 11:36PM GMTWell that is good. I am glad you learned to cope. :)
I haven't spoken to my father in almost 5 years now, I believe.
Other then whether my little sister shoves her cell in his face and he spews out a few obligatory sentences. I'd rather him not speak to me at all.
As for my boyfriend...
I try not to be angry with him. Lately though, he has been pushing my buttons and a lot of my feelings towards him are deserved.
Like the other day we got into this huge argument and he actually wouldn't let me leave my room. So I panicked and started freaking out, because my father did that to me when I was younger. And I have told my boyfriend time and time again that he can't do things like that because they are like triggers for me. And he shouldn't be cornering me anyway. What kind of man corners his girlfriend?
We're pretty close to breaking up anyway.
The only reason he is even still living with me is because he has nowhere else to go. And I would feel awful throwing him out on the street. -
raves +2 posted Oct 27, 2008 04:36AM GMT (edited)
Answered None of the above
He's a great guy, he just was rarely around because of business. However, he and I are a lot alike, so that was usually best. We are like cats...we don't want/need to be around the person all the time, we just like to know where the other is. And he always manages to take care of "his little girl." I'm 24 and he still calls me that, esp. when he's had a few. I love my dad so much, I wonder if he knows...like, really knows. -
raves +1 posted Oct 27, 2008 02:33AM GMT (edited)
Answered My father was amazing.
His parents migrated in the early 1900's to Maui, where he was born. At the age of 16 he joined the Navy....Soon after that....Pearl Harbor happened...at the age of 16, he found himself pulling bodies from the shores of Pearl Harbor.....Soon after that, he let his superiors know his real age and was relieved from the military....(Honorably) He later joined the merchant marines.....I was the only little girl in my school who received gifts and post cards from far off lands, like Spain, China, Singapore...He loved this country...read the quote from him in the paper when he retired...........I was the youngest of his 5 daughters and the only one born in Hawaii......My dad is no longer with me, but I will forever be his "Little Pineapple", his "Lil Kanakarican"
I made this video....it was very healing for me after he passed away
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raves +2 posted Oct 26, 2008 11:30PM GMT
Answered Just a regular old dad I guess.
My dad was a quiet man. He was hardworking, honest, and proud. If he told you something, you could believe it, for he felt lying was as bad as stealing something that did not belong to you.
My personal relationship with him was one of mutual respect. Whenever I attempted to accomplish anything, though he said little, his body language always let me know that I was great and special. Want to know something unique about it? He and my mom were divorced. So, you see, children who are victims of divorce can and do have healthy relationships with their parents. -
raves +1 posted Oct 26, 2008 11:05PM GMT (edited)
Answered My father was amazing.
My Dad is Great! He would help anyone in need.He would give you the shirt off his back.He was very loving and we did alot of things together when i was growing up hunting, fishing ,snowmobling .He taught me alot about life and how to fix things myself from a toilet to a roof. I get strength from him everyday just knowing He 's there. He's the Best Dad you could ever ask for. He is always there for me.I love you Dad! -
raves +1 posted Oct 26, 2008 10:49PM GMT (edited)
Answered My dad did some serious damage. (Abuse/left)
he doesnt even know how to spell my name, he thinks that guys should have control over evrything and looks at us in a wrong perverted wrong but yet were still forced to visit him every other weekend
Answered My father was amazing.
He was very strict with me when I was young, and I'm glad he was strict, and still is! Because of him, I became a disciplined, responsible and independent individual. He motivates me to do well in my studies, and also in everything else I do. He's very supportive. He believes in having self-respect, self-confidence, and also having values. He always puts his family first before everything else. He had a very difficult life when he was a young child, and he worked hard to change his lifestyle; from the son of a poor fisherman into an architect, chartered surveyor and a C.E.O. He didn't want his children to lead the same life he lead when he was young. He wanted to change his future, for his benefit and his future family (us).
He admits to his own mistakes and he is a very good listener and advicer. He will go all out to help a ...
He was very strict with me when I was young, and I'm glad he was strict, and still is! Because of him, I became a disciplined, responsible and independent individual. He motivates me to do well in my studies, and also in everything else I do. He's very supportive. He believes in having self-respect, self-confidence, and also having values. He always puts his family first before everything else. He had a very difficult life when he was a young child, and he worked hard to change his lifestyle; from the son of a poor fisherman into an architect, chartered surveyor and a C.E.O. He didn't want his children to lead the same life he lead when he was young. He wanted to change his future, for his benefit and his future family (us).
He admits to his own mistakes and he is a very good listener and advicer. He will go all out to help a relative or a close friend of his. He's very protective of the ones he cares about...
My father isn't a very affectionate person. He is the type who gets awkward when it comes to hugs and emotional moments. But I know, deep down inside, that he really does love me and the family very much. I couldn't have asked for a better father.