"Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it."

~ Ellen Goodman

It is so rare for me to find someone I feel understood by and who I can really connect with. And it never lasts, I know. But it's what I live for.

playing acoustic guitar, but only when I feel like it. I love reading, but not just books. I haven't been reading books lately because I get too busy reading magazines like national geographic, mental floss, time, psychology today. I love traveling but can't afford it, so I'll just get out of town any chance I get, even if it's just for the weekend. I've lived in east texas my entire life, and I hate it so much. I hate it. I want to move to california, central coast area. New Mexico would be my second choice.

Live shows! Seeing one of my favorite bands is probably the most rewarding experience I know of. If buying the tickets means I can't pay the bills that month, I don't care. it is worth it. It's divine.

>>>> <a href="http:www.profilepl... src="http:www.profileplaylist.net/mc/i... title="hrefhttp www profileplaylist net" height="34" width="138" orig_size="138x34" alt="Get a playlist!" border="0"/>

Requiem for a Dream
Fight Club
American Beauty
City of God
Pink Floyd the Wall
Office Space
Natural Born Killers
Waking Life
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
STAR WARS!
V for Vendetta

The Catcher in the Rye
A Clockwork Orange
Requiem for a Dream
Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo
AZTEC by Gary Jennings
The Scarlet Letter
The Iliad
A People's History of the United States by Howard Zinn
tao te ching
Prozac Nation by Elizabeth Wurtzel
Drop City by T.C. Boyle
and many more...

"You only lose what you cling to."

"No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." -- Friedrich Nietzsche

"A guilty conscience needs to confess. A work of art is a confession." -- Albert Camus

"They killed the flirt whom folks called Life for leading them on. Making them think the next sunrise would be worth it; that another stroke of time would do it at last. Only when she was dead would they be safe. The successful ones — the ones who had been there enough years to have maimed, mutilated, maybe even buried her — kept watch over the others who were still in her cock-teasing hug, caring and looking forward, remembering and looking back." -Toni Morrison, Beloved

"Let us be grateful to the mirror for revealing to us our appearance only. -- Samuel Butler, Erewhon"

"The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently." ~Friedrich Nietzsche, The Dawn, 1881

"Never do anything against conscience even if the state demands it." ~Albert Einstein

"Nothing further then he uttered - not a feather then he fluttered -
Till I scarcely more than muttered `Other friends have flown before -
On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before.'
Then the bird said, `Nevermore.'"

"Have you even been in love? Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...

You give them a piece of you. They don't ask for it. They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like "maybe we should just be friends" or "how very perceptive" turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-... pain. I hate love."

in Sandman: The Kindly Ones by Neil Gaiman

the sandman.
Dough Martsch, of Built to Spill, is a role model of mine.
there are many more and I'm too drunk to think of them at the moment.