Would You Let Your Child Get Plastic Surgery In Order to Escape Bullying?

by SodaHead Living Posted 2012/07/30 00:47:24

Related Topics: Nadia Ilse, Plastic Surgery, Teens, Bullying, Bullies, LBFF, Little Baby Face Foundation, Dumbo, New York City, Georgia, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, CNN

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699 votes
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	Yes	230 votes	33%
	No	469 votes	67%

14-year-old Nadia Ilse is the latest teen to turn to plastic surgery in order to ward off bullies. Since the first grade, school bullies had taunted Nadia about the size of her ears, calling her “Dumbo” and “elephant ears.” At the age of ten, Nadia began begging her mom for otoplasty—an operation to pin her ears back—but her mother couldn’t afford the surgery.

Recently, however, the Little Baby Face Foundation stepped in to help. LBFF is a charity that provides free corrective surgery to children born with facial deformities. The foundation brought Nadia to New York City from Georgia and paid $40,000 for her to undergo otoplasty, as well as rhinoplasty (reducing the size of her nose) and mentoplasty (altering her chin.)

Nadia told CNN’s chief medical correspondent Dr. Sanjay Gupta that the bullying “hurt so much,” and caused her to become withdrawn and antisocial. After the surgery she said, "I look beautiful, this is exactly what I wanted, I love it."

We’re certainly glad that Nadia feels more confident in her appearance. But is getting plastic surgery really the answer? Is it empowering for the victim? Or does giving in just let the bullies win? It may be a bit both. Regardless, it seems like this trend is here to stay.

What do you think SodaHeads? Would you let your child get plastic surgery in order to escape bullying?

+25

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JCLadybug 2012/07/30 00:55:39

No

+15
I had/have big ears and have grown into them some. Give kids a chance to grow up first. I hope this plastic surgery for kids/teens/young adults ends soon.
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More polls by SodaHead Living

Shadow Wolf 2012/10/31 06:11:39 (edited)

No

ummmmmmmmm..why would they donate that much money for her when they could of donated that money for the homelss people who are starving and clothless...and by the way she still looks the same..just with more fakeness...she should of kept her ears cuz god makes everyone perfect..and for me alternating ur looks like that is pretty much saying that u hate the way god created u

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P. Sturm 2012/09/14 18:08:12

Yes

To have a good self image, yes.

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Invader_Ellie_Slamacow 2012/08/16 07:14:52

Yes

only if there were something awfully wrong with their face... like an eyeball on their chin.
the girl in that pic tho? she just needed a few tweezes to her eyebrows, to wear sunscreen more often, and a few good face washes. now she'll look all wack when she's through with puberty cuz her face won't know how to grow.

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You Know IT 2012/08/12 07:45:06

Yes

+1
If the situation was that bad yeah, but otherwise i'd probably just beat the crap outa the bullies to the point where they would need a foundation to provide plastic surgery for bullies who were beat up by victims parents. (course thats just talk, i wouldn't know how i would react till it happens)

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JesstonDavidson 2012/08/08 09:56:43

Yes

Absolutely - I would do just about anything to make my child's life easier, even if it means allowing them to alter their appearance. I wouldn't take it lightly, and we'd try everything else first, but if they were being tortured by other children I'd do whatever I could.

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David 2012/08/07 09:16:10 (edited)

Yes

We use artificial products and man made technology to improve various aspects of our lives. Plastic surgery is no different.

Life is unfair in so many ways, and this procedure is one way to make up for that unfairness. It's obvious that she will be treated much better by society, because most human beings judge based on appearance.

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Ruby aka Baby Tinks 2012/08/06 20:30:28

No

Flaws are damn beautiful and should be respected! Kids should not be bullied because of their looks, they should live in a comfortable and happy environment, but unfortunately, that wish will never be granted upright. This is atrocious!

P. L. B

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Sarah Alexander 2012/08/05 16:53:11

Yes

However, they need to be old enough for certain procedures. If a child isn't done growing and they get cosmetic surgery, they could end up looking really bad or having serious complications.
I'm not a doctor so I don't know and do trust that any reputable doctor would only perform the procedure if it were safe, but if just seems that her face could change a lot over the next few years and a nose job could be regrettable. However, I know plenty of young teens who have gotten nose jobs and are fine as adults, I'm just basing this on how much I changed even from 14 to 16 - I was just about begging for a nose job when I was 14 and, looking back, it wasn't bad, and now I actually get compliments on my nose which is why I will wait a couple more years before any cosmetic surgery to see if it gets better or I become happy with whatever I want to change.

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jubil8 BN-0 PON 2012/08/03 21:44:38

Yes

Wow, she wanted otoplasty and ended up with a whole new face? Not sure how that follows, but she's happy and won't be bullied anymore, so where's the harm.

I don't think it lets bullies win -- her mother didn't leap up and take out a 2nd mortage to pay for this. A foundation that exists precisely for this purpose stepped up. Now the bullies have to find another target. Hard on the new target, but that's a different issue. It seems kind of weird to me to say "Let her suffer so the bullies don't win."

I don't see much difference between this and braces (and "invisible" ones are nothing but a way to accomplish the goal without subjecting the child to bullying about being a "metal mouth"). This isn't "Buy me a car or everyone will laugh at me."

It breaks a parent's heart to watch a child suffer for something unavoidable.

She sure doesn't look 14 anymore! :)

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SpongeBob 2012/08/03 11:51:25

No

But i depends on what your child is getting bullyed about at school or at work.

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Blondie 2012/08/01 22:35:46

Yes

Whats the problem (in this particular case) of her getting plastic surgery? The matter of fact is: she looks better, and i doubt that someone will make fun of her again. I also highly doubt that she will regret it because she looks so much better now.

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Peter John 2012/08/01 18:18:01

No

Then they would still bully him or her for getting the plastic surgery. Better to instill self-confidence and an attitude that exceeds the mockery.

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CryptoKnight 2012/08/01 16:29:30

Yes

+1
I spent thousands of dollars on 2 of my three kids' teeth, I see many other cosmetic surgeries as equally beneficial.

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Platinum Fangs 2012/08/01 12:48:14

No

I think this is more descriptive of how spineless teenagers are becoming. Kids getting plastic surgery to avoid name calling and killing themselves over internet insults. Grow a thicker skin and stand up for yourselves!

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Peter O'Reilly 2012/08/01 10:49:09

No

Because if you have the surgery you are giving into the bullies.

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ValorNET 2012/07/31 23:07:40

No

+2
This is just another way to be LAZY.
This is NOT confronting a problem, this is clear side-stepping!
And obviously caving to pressure. What a great life lesson, NOT.

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POWERSHAKER 2012/07/31 21:15:36

Yes

In that case, I might let my child have plastic surgery. If the bullying was extremely bad, I don't see why not. However, plastic surgery should always be the very last resort. Plastic surgery is rarely if ever an answer. People can go overboard with it.

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Metaldane 2012/07/31 20:42:50

Yes

I wouldn't encourage it and I'd have a very long discussion about it, the effects of the surgery, the permanence of it, and so on. But if after we've talked and they've taken time to think it over for at least a year or two, and still want it I'd let them because it's their body and it's a change they're sure they want.

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J 2012/07/31 20:29:40

No

You've got to be kidding? When the IN-thing has got to be big ears (in support of Obama), why would anyone want to change theirs?

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Cierra 2012/07/31 18:42:47

No

I don't think that plastic surgery is appropriate for kids. The way to get through to a bully is to stand up for yourself. But that's just how I feel.

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CryptoK... to Cierra 2012/08/01 16:32:10

+2
IMHO, it takes self-confidence to stand up to the bully, so this becomes a vicious circle. Nevertheless, for one of my children we took two steps: braces and martial arts. Two very good choices.

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Cierra to CryptoK... 2012/08/09 20:10:44

True. When I was getting picked on in fourth grade, I asked my mom to sign me up for Tae Kwon Do classes.

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joan.sloane 2012/07/31 18:18:54

Yes

+2
Bullies never change. When they grow up they just use different techniques. Having a strong positive self image is the first step toward the achievement of goals. The only message this girl has had reinforced in her mind is that she is not enough. So yes, have the surgery and shut those shut those bullies up.

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Ramón to joan.sl... 2012/07/31 18:38:52

Bullies HAVE a strong self image, postitive self image. They value themselves over and above anyone else!

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jennifer to Ramón 2012/08/01 01:22:21

+3
No, quite the opposite, thats why they are bullies, to make themselves feel better about who they are. Bullies are weak!

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Diddley Squat 2012/07/31 18:16:00

No

Plastic surgery for kids is fine if it's to correct something abnormal or a disfiguring injury.

The way to end bullying is to stand up to them.

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tatilee(: 2012/07/31 18:06:16

No

+2
You're basically giving the bully satisfaction. We all have things about us that we sometimes wish we could change, but dealing with them, and embracing them seriously makes you 10x's more beautiful.

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Israel to tatilee(: 2012/07/31 18:22:14

+1
Children are not the only bullies.

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Earl Hickey 2012/07/31 17:09:42

No

+1
Not a good way to escape bullying.
And the repercussions of a botched face job are dire at best.

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harley oldman 2012/07/31 17:01:35

No

NOPE.....Get her a good ceramic knife.

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ellomotto 2012/07/31 16:32:46

No

+1
This is utter crap having large ears is not a deformity!

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PDenoli 2012/07/31 16:16:01

No

Honestly, I wouldn't be thrilled about a child of mine getting plastic surgery for any reason, but I could accept it in certain cases.

However, doing this in order to please people who are harassing and abusing you? Ugh!!! No! I can't think of a worse reason and I'd feel like an abysmal parent if I allowed or supported it.

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joan.sl... to PDenoli 2012/07/31 18:39:27

+2
Hi, What you say makes sense and I do not mean to be critical but what is this daily torment doing to the girl psychologically? It wouldn't be acceptable for an adult going to work to be verbally abused by a gang of coworkers. In my opinion it's even worse for a youngster without the experience or resources to deal with it. For me it would be a difficult decision. No argument intended just another point of view.

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PDenoli to joan.sl... 2012/08/06 16:54:34

I appreciate your response and it's a good discussion. Between the two of us, I think there's a difference in perspective. We both agree that the daily torment isn't fun or good or healthy for the girl. Yes, definitely.

However, it sounds as though you support resolving the situation through surgery. And perhaps it sounds as though I feel this situation can ONLY be rectified with thicker skin.

To be clearer, I would say that there are a range of things that can be done, including repercussions for her tormentors as well as getting her to talk to someone about building up her self-respect. And sure, maybe some "style points" might be useful. For instance, if I were doing a makeover, I might suggest it's a bad idea to pull the hair back tight behind her ears if she wants them to blend in. However... even a change in hairstyle shouldn't be done to appease her tormenters. My opinion - it concedes her power as an individual to all tormentors when you do that.

That's really my point in a nutshell - The lesson she seems to be getting from this is that her tormentors are right, she IS a hideous thing, and she SHOULD be expected to mutilate herself to appease them. And my reaction to that message, in a word, is YUCK!

This isn't a corrective surgery. She wasn't savaged by an ape, ...

I appreciate your response and it's a good discussion. Between the two of us, I think there's a difference in perspective. We both agree that the daily torment isn't fun or good or healthy for the girl. Yes, definitely.

However, it sounds as though you support resolving the situation through surgery. And perhaps it sounds as though I feel this situation can ONLY be rectified with thicker skin.

To be clearer, I would say that there are a range of things that can be done, including repercussions for her tormentors as well as getting her to talk to someone about building up her self-respect. And sure, maybe some "style points" might be useful. For instance, if I were doing a makeover, I might suggest it's a bad idea to pull the hair back tight behind her ears if she wants them to blend in. However... even a change in hairstyle shouldn't be done to appease her tormenters. My opinion - it concedes her power as an individual to all tormentors when you do that.

That's really my point in a nutshell - The lesson she seems to be getting from this is that her tormentors are right, she IS a hideous thing, and she SHOULD be expected to mutilate herself to appease them. And my reaction to that message, in a word, is YUCK!

This isn't a corrective surgery. She wasn't savaged by an ape, she's not a burn victim. She isn't growing tumors and she's not "elephant man". She doesn't even have a cleft lip. There's absolutely nothing "wrong" with her in any way. I can't see this as anything other than a situation where someone is mutilating herself to please people who are harassing her. To me, that is the opposite of a healthy response.

Let me contrast that with something to show the difference. Let's say that after counseling and after meaningful behavior modification of her tormentors.... and after a new hairstyle if that is something recommended in the course of counseling... After ALL of that, and she's recovered. Then, in some far distant future when she isn't being harassed about her appearance and if she WANTS to make a change for HERSELF... then okay, a discussion could be had.

Okay - I confess I still wouldn't be thrilled that she felt the desire to change her appearance, but under those circumstances I wouldn't find it repugnant, either. As a parent, and if I felt it was something she was doing for herself - I'd support her decision.

No argument perceived or intended.
(more)

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Willow 2012/07/31 16:07:09

Yes

+1
If my child, which is never going to be born, had ears like dumbo, I'd help her out.

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Earl Hi... to Willow 2012/07/31 17:10:41

+1
just goes to show how shallow you are

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Willow to Earl Hi... 2012/08/01 04:48:23

Thanks

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addie 2012/07/31 15:56:50 (edited)

No

+2
Corrective plastic surgery to repair deformities is one thing, doing anything at all because of low self esteem combined with peer pressure is quite another.

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xcide13 2012/07/31 15:40:32

No

I would teach them how to fight...surgery? What happens when one of these kids doesn't wake up or contracts a deadly infection because their damn ears were too big...what a joke...

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ssanneh442 2012/07/31 15:37:08

No

Back in the day, there was none of this plastic surgery crap. You just sucked it up and dealt with it. Kids these days are too caught up in appearances to realize that it doesn't matter what others think, only you can put yourself down. She looked fine before, if she backed that look up with confidence and laughter, she would have found she had friends that would always be there for her and support her. I've never been bullied about my looks, and I know I'm no model; but I believe I'm beautiful all the same. She just needed to have more faith in herself.

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