Would You Agree to a Relationship Contract?

Living 2012/05/29 19:45:32
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Last week, we gave you the scoop on Mark Zuckerberg's new bride, Priscilla Chan. But we neglected to mention that she supposedly agreed to a "relationship contract."

According to the book "The Facebook Effect," Zuckerberg, 28, agreed to spend at least 100 minutes of private time with Chan, 27, each week, as well as take her on at least one date. They also agreed to vacation for two weeks yearly overseas.

So, is making such a "deal" a good idea? A blogger for dating site howaboutwe.com thinks so, writing: "Dating an eccentric billionaire seems like it’s probably no cake-walk, but Priscilla has obviously done a good job of making sure their relationship remains a priority for the Facebook founder. 100 minutes is less than two hours, but even that can seem like a godsend when you’re dating someone who is just really, really busy."

It's unclear whether the couple agreed to this deal verbally or whether they actually signed papers. But the howaboutwe writer thinks we could all take a page out of the Facebook founder's book:

"Personally, I’m pretty pro agreements or pacts within a relationship. It could be about anything, from the frequency of sex, to the divying up of household chores, to where you spend holidays together as a couple. It may seem unromantic to mandate rules, but having a clear set of expectations for both partners makes it easy to ensure that needs are being met." Do you agree?

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  • endthefed.soundmoney 2012/05/29 23:01:00
    Hell NO!!
  • Vitalani 2012/05/29 22:48:47
    Anyone who said no and is married is a huge hypocrite. -_- Just sayin'.
  • AmericanVirus 2012/05/29 22:43:29
    Well I couldn't find the video I wanted, but this one will suffice.
  • Samantha 2012/05/29 22:38:34
    If both sides are happy and they believe its the right thing to do then why not. however signing actual papers is way over the top
  • ctwal 2012/05/29 22:36:04
    When there is love,faith and understanding then there is no need for this kind of contracts. Solders that serve out and faraway from there countries definitely have faith in there wives that they have to put up with the situation and take the burden of the family responsibilities.for sure the must be very understanding,faithful and loving wife who knows that her husband is risking his life to feed the family.

    Money should not control our lives,it is us that we should control our money and lives,
  • Leona Hill 2012/05/29 22:35:02
    Leona Hill
    I would under the right circumstances but it would depend entirely on what was in the contract. I would not agree to anything the took away too much of my freedom or required me to be the answer to all of some guy's problems.
  • rknothead 2012/05/29 22:33:16
    Love is one thing, but having to split all your stuff in half considering half of marriages end in divorce just doesn't sound like there's much love involved anymore.
  • strawberry rknothead 2012/05/30 00:59:36
    Get what you want from the start. There might be nothing left to divide by the time you divorce.
  • rknothead strawberry 2012/05/30 03:14:54
    LOL, guess I should have done that with the first 3, instead of buying all my stuff twice.
  • N-RagedOwner 2012/05/29 22:29:04
    She agrees to give me sex when I want it and I agree to be horny often. Sounds like a good deal to me.
  • Rachel 2012/05/29 22:25:53
    .... R.I.P Romance.
  • Gloria Rachel 2012/05/30 15:49:59
  • prosperhappily 2012/05/29 22:09:08
    At first, I didn't like the idea of something so scripted.

    But, as I've thought about it, every relationship has expectations, such as "no cheating on me" etc. I don't see a problem with clarifying those terms, as long as the contract is subject to revision when necessary.
  • VictorianBabe 2012/05/29 21:57:28
    No!!! Lol!!! No relationship should be that Scheduled!!! It'll define boring.
  • Ewaen 2012/05/29 21:45:52 (edited)
    You're adults and both very mature so y not. I've dated a very busy guy and it wasn't funny. Finally, our relationship went 'missing in transit' bcs he couldn't balance his work life with his relationship. That kind of contract puts a demand on the busy party. Besides, if you don't love that person, you wouldn't insist or going as far as drawing a contract up just to spend time with them. If a guy doesn't want to lose you, he'll honour it. I totally love what she did bcs she showed that though he's a billioniare, she's worth something too!
  • Emelya 2012/05/29 21:45:29
    Sounds ok relationship contract
  • émilie✿ 2012/05/29 21:44:08
    No way..
    That's just.. stupid, for lack of a better word.
  • kurt.drueke 2012/05/29 21:36:53
    Yes, a relationship is a commitment.
  • Wanderer 2012/05/29 21:34:47
    Love is love,I don't need any sort of contract to endear myself to another and I wouldn't expect it from them.
  • Loser lollipop 2012/05/29 21:33:15
    Loser lollipop
    I wouldn't call it a contract more like common sense, because when in a relationship it's important to schedule time together when life gets busy
  • Sarah Alexander 2012/05/29 21:24:24
    Sarah Alexander
    I love the idea, it may help prevent arguments.
  • Vennie 2012/05/29 21:22:08
    Maybe if I had Zuckerberg's $ I would, but otherwise, no, I think it's kind of an insult to your partner.
  • Bob P. Clarkson 2012/05/29 21:19:37
    Bob P. Clarkson
    My first reaction to this question was a loud and resounding, "NO".
    The I realized that we are no longer living in the 60's and had to pause and think about it.
    Today's young married people are not like the married couples of "my" time. Rarely do they know their husband or bride for more than a year, and with both parties working and trying to climb the ladder, people who mean the most to you can get lost in the clutter of life.
    On-line meetings followed by casual dates that escalate into "love" can be deceiving. What it often means is that neither party has the accumulated time to know important details of their soon-to-be spouse.
    Writing out expectations can solve a lot of problems, one way or the other. It can smooth the bumpy road that marriage is in any situation, or it can shine a light on something that is non-negotiable by one spouse or another.
    My DW and I have been married almost 41 years. From first date to marriage was only five months. I don't know how it happened nor how I got so lucky.
    Today, even without a "relationship contract", I would seriously consider sitting down and reviewing needs and expectations. It would have saved us one huge bump, and a handful of little ones.
  • Wanderer Bob P. ... 2012/05/29 21:39:38
    Darn.!! I wish I'd sought your advice or read your answer first before I answered this...that really does make a lot of sense. There's no teacher like experience huh.!!
  • Jan 2012/05/29 21:16:51
    I prefer to base a relationship on trust and friendship.
  • TasselLady 2012/05/29 21:15:58
    It's not employment. It's marriage.
  • scbluesman13 2012/05/29 21:08:33
    So it sounds like they married for economic/lifestyle advantages and not for love. This isn't new for marriage/relationship contracts, but it's definitely not for me.
  • Inquisitve Kat 2012/05/29 21:02:06
    Inquisitve Kat
    It's bafflingly foolish.
  • geneticmistake 2012/05/29 21:00:13
    Absolutely not. Relationships should be guided by love and respect not a contract. If someone isn't willing to consider their partner a priority the other person should leave. Chan is virtually admitting she will be secondary to business with Zuckerberg and marries him anyway. Maybe all the money will make up for lack of attention.

    In general contracts and licenses belong in business not relationships. At least a marriage contract can be easy to get out of if the divorce is amicable. After all no one can say how long love will last. Emotions are fickle. When love rules a relationship things like dividing up chores and spending time together will come naturally. If they don't a contract won't help.
  • Maci 2012/05/29 20:59:19
  • bienvenu.Mole 2012/05/29 20:56:29
    Yes I need the relationship.
  • Osk 2012/05/29 20:56:17
    I wouldn't sign it... though... However, in Mexico there already are Marriage Contracts... that way if the married couple divorces, both parties get 50% each and no battles
  • renee.m.lewis 2012/05/29 20:56:06
    It would be a great test before marriage.
  • Zeus2713 2012/05/29 20:42:59
    Hell no, I didn't put no ring on ur left finger B!+[#
  • Bibliophilic 2012/05/29 20:39:45 (edited)
    Yes, but not based on something as inconsequential as x many dates a week. I'd create a pre-nup, cheating is grounds for divorce as is substance abuse.

    I think that a few ground rules would be ideal- such as no yelling in the middle of an argument- we should take a break and discuss things when we're clear-headed. I can keep my half of the bargain.
  • katovic 2012/05/29 20:35:47
    I would say no because no one really understands options contracts. I do but I only make up 1% of the total retail trading public. While having say that I gave up trading. I never traded facebook but see the same patterns forming caused by day trading computers. I know this has nothing to do with relationship contracts but if banks don't honor their trades you might have to rework the 2 weeks overseas if times get tough and that 40-70 billion dollar spread I talked about before continues to gap down. Its funny to me but at the same time alot of foolish people invested in facebook so far just for the statue of owning something trendy and fashionable. I guess if you sold you don't care but unlike Zynga I hope you dont dilute the shareholder base to the ridiculous extend Mark pincus has effectively owning nothing and incapable of covering his day to day costs because of this offset. What do I know though I only been unemployed for 3 years mark and had the likes of more banks take my life savings away again.
  • Inquisi... katovic 2012/05/29 21:05:02
    Inquisitve Kat
  • Bethany Jansen 2012/05/29 20:34:22
    Bethany Jansen
    Before I read the article, I thought it was ridiculous. But now I think its a good idea. It's a good way to resolve issues of time spent together, chores, etc.
  • rosesvengeance BN-0 2012/05/29 20:29:11
    rosesvengeance BN-0
    In the case of marring a person like this who is extremely busy I think the contract was a good idea. It will help to make sure he remembers to make time for her. Most relationships however wouldn't need this.
  • Susan 2012/05/29 20:26:41
    This question isn't saying anything about a marriage contract. It's a relationship contract. Just saying. I think it is a way to keep there relationship going and healthy.

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2016/02/08 23:26:10

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