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Why are some women attracted to abusive men?

Alexander0001 2011/06/19 18:34:31
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  • Lynn 2011/06/19 19:13:33 (edited)
    Lynn
    +3
    Most abusers are in fact, control freaks. They control through manipulation. They seek out women that are emotionally weak and easily fall prey to their sweet talk and manipulation.

    Most of the women that fall into these relationship are women that lack internal worth and seek external validation... something that the controlling manipulator type readily gives.

    The relationship sours when the woman expresses any disagreement, at which time the abusive nature of the control freak comes out when he doesnt get his way..

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  • Renegade 2011/06/30 18:14:58
    Renegade
    I wonder if there are cases where the man is abused and why don't we see them as much. Just a question.
  • Alexand... Renegade 2011/07/01 17:07:14
    Alexander0001
    Cos it's more common to hear that women are abused so that's why we don't see man as much
  • sczen8 2011/06/22 01:20:26
    sczen8
    'cause alot of women stay with and dig..trash! thats what those men are...
  • Alexander0001 2011/06/20 23:40:07 (edited)
    Alexander0001
    Abusive relationships are never abusive in the beginning.
    Many women in their hearts and heads thought it would never happen again.
    They thouhgt"I understand that things happen and get out of control once in a while, and people make mistakes"
    Some others believed that when it started to happen more they thought it was their fault and they were causing it.
    So instead of getting away, it's like they wanted to see if they could be with him without causing him to be mad and do and say the things he did. Many women don't want to admit it's happening, so it's hard to get help out of it.

    What about women who were no abused. They were never mistreated or neglected as a child, and never hit.
    A lot of people say that these women are weak, low self esteem or stupid, but they're not, and They never have been.It is a time in their lives where they don't have good judgment.Because they used to say "I'd never stay with a guy who hit me" or "I'd hit him back and get rid of him" "nobody will ever talk down to me" trust me, unless you are in someone Else's shoes don't judge

    Every case is different but one thing is for sure all of them just wanted one thing: to love and being loved.
  • Kuchi_Main 2011/06/20 03:55:07
    Kuchi_Main
    they like the pain
  • Fannie 2011/06/19 23:57:14
    Fannie
    snydrome
  • METALheadMom 2011/06/19 23:22:23
    METALheadMom
    They have very strong "Mother" instincts and think they can change the guy.
  • Bob 2011/06/19 21:40:51
    Bob
    Amazingly, many women appear to desire "the bad boys" however when they get them they end up being abused by source of their desires, then are surprized that they can't change those traits to which they perceived they were drawn to! Just an observation!
  • Sister Hoover of the Immacu... 2011/06/19 19:54:04
    Sister Hoover of the Immaculate Conception
    Why is it that men with tiny penis's hit women?
  • AnnS (Anti-RP2012] 2011/06/19 19:31:40
    AnnS (Anti-RP2012]
    ditto on Lynn's post

    Generations ago "battered women's syndrome" was just unknown sickness. It is really good news in our days to bring this into the public limelight. Woman that suffer from this almost always attrack males like a magnet who are just looking for someone to control and abuse.

    There are signs to look for before getting too involved, but they are not always set in stone and some signs are just as a result of male pride. And to be the sole bread winners etc...which is not a bad thing. And is even commendable. (OT: Another extremist is the modern day feminist movement; male bashing, and condescending to the honorable stay at home moms.)
  • Viper Two Six 2011/06/19 19:24:57
  • Lynn 2011/06/19 19:13:33 (edited)
    Lynn
    +3
    Most abusers are in fact, control freaks. They control through manipulation. They seek out women that are emotionally weak and easily fall prey to their sweet talk and manipulation.

    Most of the women that fall into these relationship are women that lack internal worth and seek external validation... something that the controlling manipulator type readily gives.

    The relationship sours when the woman expresses any disagreement, at which time the abusive nature of the control freak comes out when he doesnt get his way..
  • Simmering Frog - PHART 2011/06/19 19:05:22
    Simmering Frog - PHART
    Because they lead boring lives and need drama to spice it up. Stay away from these poisonous people whatever you do.
  • Cantus_bird 2011/06/19 19:00:45
    Cantus_bird
    +2
    i've yet to hear a story of a man coming right out to a woman and telling her specifically, "i am an abuser". It usually comes out sooner or later that he is prone to abusive behavior .......
  • ruthannhausman 2011/06/19 18:57:31
    ruthannhausman
    +1
    That's a good question, and I suppose a lot of head hunters out there will have plenty of good responses to it. I, however, have never been able to empathize with a woman who would allow a man to slap or punch her and let him get away with it. As for being attracted to those types of men, I suppose there's some roguish charm about them when you first meet them that doesn't betray the underlying dangers. Don't know, really, because, fortunately, I've never had the misfortune to hook up with an abusive man. Hey, neat, something good in my life history. Yay.
  • Gooky 2011/06/19 18:50:35
    Gooky
    +1
    I have a younger sister that i don't talk to anymore,because of this.No,i didn't push her out of my life,she pushed me & her children from a previous marriage,out of her life.
    We weren't raised that way,so i don't get it.Maybe he can lick his eyebrows,i don't know.But she's very intelligent & beautiful,and her SO is an ugly fat piece of crap.
    I tried to help her...but "SHE LOVES HIM"..ugh,disgusting.He's been there for 15 years and me & her kids & grandkids are out!
  • Alexand... Gooky 2011/06/19 19:03:09
    Alexander0001
    +3
    Thanks for your comment.
    It is said that The relationships between abusers and victims are usually complex. Similar in someways to prisoners creating a relationship to their captors. If people are abused, those of us who have not been abused often think the first reaction will be to say stop.
  • AnnS (A... Alexand... 2011/06/19 19:34:19
    AnnS (Anti-RP2012]
    Sort of like the Stockholm syndrome??
  • Lily Blooms Eternal 2011/06/19 18:43:29
    Lily Blooms Eternal
    +2
    I think often they have come to believe that is all they deserve. I have seen women like this be in relationships with good, non-abusive guys and they inevitably find ways to screw it up. I think they do that subconsciously because they don't believe they deserve a good guy and can't handle being in a relationship with a normal, healthy person. Often they were abused when they were younger. If they were secretly abused it is harder for people to understand their behavior later in lifebecause they don't know what happened to the woman.
  • Jareth Majere 2011/06/19 18:37:05
    Jareth Majere
    +1
    for some it is a pattern of abuse they learned as children

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