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When Should You 'Friend' a New Love Interest on Facebook?

Living 2012/05/17 21:00:00
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Our friends over at How About We raise an interesting question: When is it OK to "friend" a new love interest on Facebook? According to the site, it usually comes down to a couple of factors ("I don’t want my ex to see," "I'm not ready for him to see pictures of me in a Civil War-era dress from my reenactment days," "I’m seeing someone else.") But there's gotta be a protocol for how long to wait (one date, two dates, three dates), right?



And what about the other way around? The dating site also has a few rules for what to do when someone you like friend-requests you on Facebook:

1. DO NOT HIT "ACCEPT" YET. Meaning, not until you clean up your page.

2. Start With The Important Thing: Your Top 5 Pictures. "Cast a critical eye on the 5 pictures on the top of your profile. Are these the best possible 5 pictures of you in existence?" How About We advises.

3. Scroll A Little Further. "Look through, let’s say, the next 20 of your tagged photos. Here, you’re just scrolling to quickly detag anything potentially unflattering," the site recommends.

4. Move On To The Wall. "Make sure you haven’t “'liked' any embarrassing articles lately," they say.

5. What Do You Write on Your Friends' Walls? "If your own wall has '‘hahahahahhaha!’ on So & So's Wall 500 times, delete at least 80 percent of them," they suggest (solid advice).

6. Click On "More Info." "Check it out on the off-chance that your crush does, and finds something embarrassing," they say. Meaning, if you were a huge fan of "The Smurfs" movie, it might be time for an edit!

Read More: http://www.howaboutwe.com/date-report/friend-love-...

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  • brittany 2012/05/21 01:41:16
    After the first date
    brittany
    if you're a girl, it's probably better to wait for him to friend you unless you've been dating consistantly
  • Be Original 2012/05/21 00:21:34
    Before the first date
    Be Original
    honestly you should be their friend, not love interest, first. that way if you guys get along as friends the relationship should be worth it
  • justnotsaying (: 2012/05/21 00:09:22
    Never
    justnotsaying (:
    I don't use Facebook.
  • ♥PrettyLittleLiarsLover♥ 2012/05/20 23:24:17
    Before the first date
    ♥PrettyLittleLiarsLover♥
    Well if you like them be friends with them first and if you liked it ask them on a date =1st date and after u become friends friend them lol if ur friends in reality be friends in ur cyberspace or whatever lol :D
  • diaphramable 2012/05/20 20:30:46
    After the second date
    diaphramable
    that's what i would do,
    anything too early screams out creeper psycho bitch,
    and if you wait until the third date then that makes them feel as though you're not that into them
    then after the fourth date is when you change your relationship status,
    i should write a book
  • Liliana 2012/05/20 19:12:38
    Before the first date
    Liliana
    if u dont know them ur never gonna date them
  • Sonny 2012/05/20 02:32:51
    Before the first date
    Sonny
    If your looking for real love, it can't hurt for you to be more resourceful, walking around looking for people ain't gonna help you. what if that person could be found on Facebook? ... I don't think it's a bad idea. the live chat will help alot and more fun. considering that you'll learn a lot more about this person before you actually meet them in real life. That's how distant lovers felt when you could only write letters, It good that you can keep up to date with your love interest. by the time your on your 2nd date, you won't bore each other cause you have learnt a lot over facebook and live chat. go for it.
  • ♥Lyss♥ 2012/05/19 23:22:25
    After the second date
    ♥Lyss♥
    Before the first date I meant..
  • Radical Ed 2012/05/19 22:21:14
    Never
    Radical Ed
    +2
    she has a mac, i have a PC - it just wouldn't work....
  • diaphra... Radical Ed 2012/05/20 20:31:52
    diaphramable
    amen
  • Rob Williams 2012/05/19 21:06:07
    Before the first date
    Rob Williams
    I've nothing that I'm ashamed of on my FB page... hell you can see my profile picture here! (I think that photo should be titled "Moron with startled kitten"!)

    Anyway... this is all moot... I'm too old for dating and crushes. Besides... my wife would kill me!
  • stevegtexas@aol.com 2012/05/19 18:57:55 (edited)
  • Crimson 2012/05/19 14:33:25
    Never
    Crimson
    +1
    That's a big NO! Facebook is not a match maker or a relationship counselor. It's a social media. What are you going to do, stalk his/her profile? With Facebook that is more likely to happen. If you have a crush become his/her friend in real life and get to know him/her. Don't hide behind a computer! He'll/She'll never get to know you. He/She can judge your personality by your words, but in reality he/she will never know you on a personal level.
  • .: LiVi :. 2012/05/19 12:23:38
    Never
    .: LiVi :.
    +1
    Facebook cheapens social relationships. I'd rather not know what my love interest was doing 24-7, and I'd rather get to know them face to face than over the computer. Facebook to me is just a website that enables me to keep in contact with those I otherwise wouldn't stay in contact with. People use it too much. I think it's unhealthy and changes people's perceptions of reality and relationships in real life. Why do people have to add someone as a friend on a stupid website for their real life friendship to be considered 'official'. I don't need to see ugly pictures of the guy I'm dating at some drunken party 5 years ago, or get a notification that status says he is doing a sh!t at that present moment, or seeing that he is flirting with some girl through comments. I don't want to know. I don't want to know every single boring detail about someone's life through a computer screen, it's too much too soon, that's why it ruins the spark and the authenticity of a relationship. I think I've said enough about this, I could rant on about it for years... The reason why it frustrates me really is that it seems everyone is and will eventually be totally brainwashed by facebook, and I wonder if I'll ever meet a guy my own age who is real, unique and interesting and not brainwashed like the rest of them. So many people are sheep.
  • Paulina .: LiVi :. 2012/11/23 00:46:17
    Paulina
    +7
    I totally agree with you. It's more like they label each other by what others think of them or see them as. It's more about feeling like you have a lot of friends and feeling important then having none at all. Relationship wise, you shouldn't worry about even putting your relationship status up. People shouldn't have to know up locally who your dating or what you guys do. A real relationship shouldn't interfere with others you communicate with because more people that barely go on fb have had more successful relationships then people who are constantly on fb and have their relationship status up or write on their bf/ gfs wall
  • .: LiVi :. Paulina 2012/11/25 10:56:58
    .: LiVi :.
    Exactly! God I could rant on about that stupid site for hours... People need to keep the real world seperate from the cyber world
  • Dave 007 2012/05/19 11:46:13
    Before the first date
    Dave 007
    There is too much crap to do and watch out for on FB. Glad I never signed up.
  • Aksana 2012/05/19 07:46:32
    Never
    Aksana
    Never
  • Happy_Evil_Dude 2012/05/19 06:35:07
    Before the first date
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    how's about a minute after you meet them huh?
  • Your Favorite Nerd 2012/05/19 05:36:48
    Never
    Your Favorite Nerd
    Relationship statuses on fb piss me off
  • Cat 2012/05/19 05:30:48
    Never
    Cat
    Yeah!!!!
  • selenafan224 2012/05/19 01:40:02
    After the first date
    selenafan224
    +1
    You never know how the date is going go.
  • overseanancy 2012/05/19 01:18:03
    After the first date
    overseanancy
    +1
    I think it's just safer to add someone as a friend after you have met and known some basic facts about each other.
  • Kyle 2012/05/19 00:47:15
    Before the first date
    Kyle
    +1
    All this talk about "Do this, do that, delete that, make sure you don't click that" to me it just sounds like you're putting on a mask for whoever you're dating. Personally I'd keep everything I have one there and I'd expect the person I'm dating to do the same. Facebook is a good way to learn about someone and I'd personally prefer to know who I'm dating right off the bat rather than have me or her hide it only to have it exposed later and break-up.
  • Kai-Neko 2012/05/19 00:28:17
    After the third date
    Kai-Neko
    Facebook's facebook. You control what people see on facebook. Even your potential honey. In the end. Don't post any deep dark secrets on facebook. I honestly picked a random one because for me it doesn't matter. She wants to facebook stalk me, that's cool. Doesn't mean anything interesting is on there.
  • HiddenDVS1027 2012/05/19 00:26:44
    Never
    HiddenDVS1027
    He should be the one to add you. Some women jump to conclusions, and put to much emotion into everything.
    What if he didn't like you how you thought? You will look like a complete idiot, when he posts something about his interest (not you)
    Plus I think it is way better to be friends offline first anyways. You get to know the real person.
    But yet again, it is up to you.
  • Jericho 2012/05/18 21:27:54
    Never
    Jericho
    Not interested in having my love life scrutinized by people I have never officially met. Maybe once you are married, since you kind of announce that, lol
  • bunny.elgato 2012/05/18 21:27:17
    Never
    bunny.elgato
    Facebook sucks
  • Anca 2012/05/18 21:20:56
    Before the first date
    Anca
    +3
    i don't really care,i've got nothing to hide so i'm never worried about these things.i post what i like,i write what i feel and the embarrassing pictures are part of who i am (i never like how i look in the photos so it would be a problem to choose one over another)
  • AtlBo 2012/05/18 20:51:42 (edited)
    Never
    AtlBo
    Just don't offer, because you don't care about internet friends, duh! Then if they offer, pay no attention to it, like you even look at them for 20 years before you just trash them all...

    You don't know how you have any friends. Well, what it was was that you felt sorry for someone sometimes. Definitely you didn't care...

    facebook friends
  • ChristabelLartey 2012/05/18 20:30:23
    After the first date
    ChristabelLartey
    Even though it does not work out, you may be able to use this date as a future contact for networking.
  • krisroxas 2012/05/18 20:10:16
    Before the first date
    krisroxas
    Why would it matter?
  • ocean tamer 2012/05/18 20:05:30
    After the first date
    ocean tamer
    just so they know you are very interested...
  • H-Dizzle 2012/05/18 19:56:41
    Never
    H-Dizzle
    +2
    Facebook doesn't nurture relationships....it destroys them. Just sayin'....
  • ☂cinderella.dress.in.yellow☂ 2012/05/18 19:11:11
    Never
    ☂cinderella.dress.in.yellow☂
    +1
    come on now i just met you no need for that
    i dont even have a facebook anymore
  • fallen angel 2012/05/18 18:55:17
    After the third date
    fallen angel
    u dont really knw till u get 2 knw 'em
  • Margaret Jacobson 2012/05/18 17:36:29
    Never
    Margaret Jacobson
    don't mix the 2.......it would be weird to unfriend.......who knows you might meet a better prospect elsewhere.......
  • pamsingh 2012/05/18 16:44:43
  • zach 2012/05/18 16:37:39
    Before the first date
    zach
    Uhhh I dunno, I guess it depends on the situation? But yeah, when I meet a cool girl, I dn't have much of a choice but to add her on facebook so I can talk to her. I can't get to a first date if I have no way of communicating.
  • LukeC 2012/05/18 16:28:57
    Before the first date
    LukeC
    What? My approach is usually to talk to any girl I fancy without hesitation, so why would I hesitate to add her as a friend on Facebook?
    My ex's can see look all they want
    Im not in any civil war outfits? But if I was i would do it unashamedly.
    Now if I was seeing someone else, well then she can see when I decide to break it off.

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2014/07/23 04:21:39

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