Quantcast

What would you do with a 23 yr old who refuses to find a job?

jt 2010/01/13 07:36:05
Still lives with parents, irresponsible, eat/sleep all day and stay all night alone etc...
You!
Add Photos & Videos

Top Opinion

Sort By
  • Most Raves
  • Least Raves
  • Oldest
  • Newest
Opinions

  • christine marino 2011/08/02 14:33:38
    christine marino
    +1
    I am 39 years old and I remarried, My husband has three children, one of which we just kicked out of the home... he is 23 and he totally took advantage of his living space. Never had a full time job, slept all day, partied all night. Did'nt pay a thing and never lifted a finger around the house. Now one of his sister's is writing things on FB and actually blocked me on FB... should I care about this? Some feedback would be great.
  • Zozo 2010/02/10 01:22:55
  • NObamaGirl ~ Viva Cristo Rey!~ 2010/01/17 07:03:02
    NObamaGirl ~ Viva Cristo Rey!~
    23 is PLENTY old to take responsibility for yourself. I know people that age who are married with kids and hold careers. Sounds like it's time to give this "kid" some tough love.
  • Common Sense 2010/01/15 19:10:24
    Common Sense
    My parents sent me off to college at 18, and told me not to come back (except for visits of course). I'm proud that I was able to be independent. The oarents just have to put their foot down and give him/her a deadline.
  • Night 2010/01/15 18:58:31
    Night
    I'm not even that old yet but I know if I had a room mate like that I would give them an ultimatium of finding a job or getting kicked out.
  • Judi 2010/01/15 16:59:56
    Judi
    Too late to fix a 23 year old. You get what you created. So, either you kick them out and make them sink or swim or suck it up and acknowledge this is a mess you created and perhaps you have made them dependent and this is a bad time to push this kid out with the unemployment rate IF they are not working. Could, however, begin to set schedules for duties, set bedtimes since it is your house and should be your rules if you are paying all the bills, set chores, set other limits.
  • santa6642 2010/01/15 15:52:47
    santa6642
    kick him out.
  • moethegrass 2010/01/15 15:43:38
    moethegrass
    +1
    I'd let him join the reserves to avoid the war in Viet Nam. Then put him in charge of a failing company so he can deal with countries who want to destroy us. After that let him be a partner in a losing Major league baseball team. Let him be an incompetent Governor of a State and then when he's really lazy and brain fried let him be President and ruin the country with his acquired ineptitude.
  • tamoles moetheg... 2014/01/08 03:52:24
    tamoles
    +3
    Ahahaha!!!!! Funniest thing i have read lately!!!! Thanks!!!!! And then maybe he could be
    Pope and screw up all eternity.
  • chey&chris 2010/01/15 14:54:44
    chey&chris
    well my ex didnt refuse, but he wasnt looking for one.. lame right? even tho there was a military check it wasnt enough in life ya know??
  • Promises 2010/01/15 14:21:35
    Promises
    Get professional help and then charge for room and board and do not laundry for them. If you make him comfortable, he will stay, if not comfortable he will leave.

    The Mormons used to give their son's a room that was about 10 x 8 feet, and make them work. They always wanted to get out of there.
  • snkypete Promises 2010/01/15 15:36:27
    snkypete
    They have to ,all the old guys are married to the young chicks sounds like the best reason to leave to me.
  • DaHawk 2010/01/15 13:41:40
    DaHawk
    Do people let this happen? WOW.

    Another great example of lousy parenting!
  • tamoles DaHawk 2014/01/08 03:57:28
    tamoles
    +3
    Dude, haha, it sorta creeps up on you slowly. Invisibly. And you suddenly realize maybe you love the kid too much. Besides
    Kids know their parents and are experts at maniplation. Try having some of your own and see. Its great fun. Cheers.
  • Alex 2010/01/15 06:24:04
    Alex
    Tell them they have to pay board each week or get out.
  • wiszard 2010/01/15 05:52:37
    wiszard
    Go to the Sheriffs office and have a 72 hour notice to vacate served on him.

    sheriffs office 72 notice vacate served
  • CapnJub 2010/01/15 05:43:46
    CapnJub
    Ah i'm in that boat minus refusing of finding work. Still can't.
    If being on the Care Giver role and having enough of it i'll force work onto them.
  • &Alicia& 2010/01/15 04:41:35
    &Alicia&
    Lock the fridge, change the locks on the door and make them take care of your every need like you did for them...
  • Azrael-In GOD we trust 2010/01/15 04:34:29
    Azrael-In GOD we trust
    Stays out all nite? Change the locks and the 23 year old can stay out all day-maybe then that 23 year old will take the hint.
  • Peon of the Masses 2010/01/15 04:19:06
    Peon of the Masses
    +1
    Get them to get certified on as having mental illness disability so they can get money to pay for their room and board. Heh.
  • Azrael-... Peon of... 2010/01/15 04:35:31
    Azrael-In GOD we trust
    Good idea!
  • Alistair 2010/01/15 03:34:00
    Alistair
    hmm.... idk maybe trial by fire is necessary
  • Barry S 2010/01/15 03:33:58
    Barry S
    +1
    Set them free.....

    free
  • Donnie 2010/01/15 03:09:05
  • Alex Donnie 2010/01/15 06:25:22
    Alex
    Its not too smart though. Staying at home longer gives you the chance to save lots of rent money and possibly be able to buy your own place, avoiding the rent trap which gets you no where.

    Parents willing
  • Donnie Alex 2010/01/15 17:54:27
  • Alex Donnie 2010/01/16 08:14:27
    Alex
    Well, yeah a 23 year old should have a job so you are right there. A real slacker shouldn't be living with his parents but that parents would surely be doormats if they let the situation get that bad.
  • Dave Th... Donnie 2010/01/15 11:09:53
    Dave The Rave
    Why "he"? My neighbor has a 21-year-old daughter who moved back from another state and is lounging at her mother's place. Job? What job? She isn't even TRYING to get one, is on "socail sites" all day and hardly does anything to earn her keep.

    As long as they can 'sponge', they will! It took me until my early 20's to find work and I went to college beforehand - tuition was less than $400 per semester and I worked to pay my bills while I went. I'm in my 40's now and have had a permanent job for 20-plus years.

    "The economy" is a cop-out, since there are PLENTY of jobs out there and some are just too lazy not to apply!
  • Donnie Dave Th... 2010/01/15 18:16:07
  • DaHawk Donnie 2010/01/15 13:43:09
    DaHawk
    But our government surely would take care of him after Mommy and Daddy kicked him out....so sad so sad...there has to be SOME kind of government program to take care of the lazy. Maybe he can call ACORN they might have a program just right for him too.
  • Donnie DaHawk 2010/01/15 18:19:17
  • DaHawk Donnie 2010/01/15 21:57:43
    DaHawk
    +1
    The key to this topic was the REFUSES TO GET A JOB...if you let a 23 year old freeload he or she will never understand the value of a buck!

    That is why I described that as bad parenting and made the sarcastic comment about the Government taking care of him or her. When we try to ease everyone's pain we never teach anyone a lesson on personal responsibility.
  • Donnie DaHawk 2010/01/15 22:47:12
  • Dee 2010/01/15 03:07:07
    Dee
    Throw the bum out
  • WhoaIt'sSarah. 2010/01/15 01:23:53
    WhoaIt'sSarah.
    +1
    Two words: Good Bye.
  • chaoskitty123 2010/01/15 00:17:33
    chaoskitty123
    +1
    Whore them out since they seem so good at screwing you... make it pay off ;P

    Seriously though and sorry for the bad joke. We have for decades been making life softer and softer for our children to the point we have millions of them still living with, and living off, of their parents even into their 40's now. We wanted to make things easier for our children and we never considered that life is supposed to have it's difficulties to overcome which is what made us what we are. So when you make things easier and easier for your children, the process inevitably requires that you do more and more for them until it reaches a point where they get lazier and lazier because you're there to "make things easier" to a point they can't do anything on their own nor do they want to.

    in a sad way of looking at things, they have become more like family pets who expect to be fed, watered and cared for and because this is how we treat our pets, maybe we just didn't realize we at some point began to raise our children the same way we raise a puppy.

    if you toss them out, they'll become lost like a stray which is why so many of our children wind up homeless, dependent on government or psychologically damaged. If you try to push them off on someone else, they resent you. If you try to lead them int...







    Whore them out since they seem so good at screwing you... make it pay off ;P

    Seriously though and sorry for the bad joke. We have for decades been making life softer and softer for our children to the point we have millions of them still living with, and living off, of their parents even into their 40's now. We wanted to make things easier for our children and we never considered that life is supposed to have it's difficulties to overcome which is what made us what we are. So when you make things easier and easier for your children, the process inevitably requires that you do more and more for them until it reaches a point where they get lazier and lazier because you're there to "make things easier" to a point they can't do anything on their own nor do they want to.

    in a sad way of looking at things, they have become more like family pets who expect to be fed, watered and cared for and because this is how we treat our pets, maybe we just didn't realize we at some point began to raise our children the same way we raise a puppy.

    if you toss them out, they'll become lost like a stray which is why so many of our children wind up homeless, dependent on government or psychologically damaged. If you try to push them off on someone else, they resent you. If you try to lead them into getting work or moving out on their own, they will bite the hand that feeds them.

    In a sense, you are to blame because this is how you raised them to turn out.

    The only thing you can do is toss them out and be there for them to help pick up the pieces while finding the strength to look away when they fall on their faces because you cannot always be there to pick them up. The hardest thing a parent can ever do is abandon their children no matter what their age, but if they love them... sometimes a sacrifice must be made.

    You are in no different a situation than a parent who must give up their child to a spouse, family member or adoption to a stranger because they can better raise and care for your child than you can.

    It's time for you to abandon your child to society because it can better raise your child from this point on. Whatever you may have done right or wrong, the fact they will not leave or even look for work means that in some way you have failed them. Now, it's time for society to take over and your role is to keep them from becoming totally lost... but your role is not to care for them any longer as they are adults and it's time they respect that fact while you respect them as adults instead of the child you once had to provide for because they could not provide for themselves... that's no longer the case and if they fail, they fail. That's life and unless you plan on marrying them... it's time for your kid to move out and create a life of their own.
    (more)
  • christi... chaoski... 2011/08/02 14:25:03
    christine marino
    +1
    Wow!! Very well said...
  • wolf sloan 2010/01/14 23:16:22
    wolf sloan
    My parents would've kicked my @$$ out after high school.
  • brandi 2010/01/14 22:59:00
    brandi
    Well my " 21 yr old brother" was living with me and my husband but unfortunately we finally had to kick him out because he kept skipping work and blowing what little money he did make. Now hes back living with my mom.
  • swim2bgood 2010/01/14 22:12:22
    swim2bgood
    +1
    He should at least be looking for a job, or thinking about going to school or joining the military.

See Votes by State

The map above displays the winning answer by region.

Living

2014/12/20 21:38:16

Hot Questions on SodaHead
More Hot Questions

More Community More Originals