What happens when you're not happy anymore, but change would mean losing your home, your job, your love-life, everything in your life would change?

Question Living

What happens when you're not happy anymore, but change would mean losing your home, your job, your love-life, everything in your life would change?

by Lizabelle Posted July 09, 2008 01:30:24

15 answers
Read all 39 comments
+4 raves

What do you do? Do you sit around and not give a shit and try to be happy anyway? Do you say F*** it and change everything anyway?

Results
Recommend This

	Make yourself happy 47% 7 votes
	None of the above 27% 4 votes
	Undecided 13% 2 votes
	Don't change a thing 7% 1 vote
	F* it all, get high and forget about it. 7% 1 vote**
	All of the above 0% 0 votes

Question Closed

Top Comment

+2 raves Fredrick D. October 01, 2008 04:14:43

Answered: Make yourself happy
If it doesn't make you happy, then fuck it. Fuck the lifestyle that is ONLY a safe haven to you. That doesn't mean to be reckless though. DONT BE RECKLESS. If you really are wanting to move on, think on it. Virtually create the next steps of your life in some sort of compiled list. But make it elaborate, if everything in your life is about to be vehemently tossed on the window, you better make damn sure you know where it lands.. That doesn't mean dont live a happy-go-lucky life, its just that the magnitude of change seems like its going to be so much u that you have to know where your going. Hoped this has helped you in some way to be decisicive about your problem.
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+1 raves
SparkleyPie *Mojo is my hom... October 01, 2008 04:48:50

Answered: Make yourself happy
Fake it 'til you make it. If you "act" happy for long enough, you'll cheer up.
+2 raves
Fredrick D. October 01, 2008 04:14:43

Answered: Make yourself happy
If it doesn't make you happy, then fuck it. Fuck the lifestyle that is ONLY a safe haven to you. That doesn't mean to be reckless though. DONT BE RECKLESS. If you really are wanting to move on, think on it. Virtually create the next steps of your life in some sort of compiled list. But make it elaborate, if everything in your life is about to be vehemently tossed on the window, you better make damn sure you know where it lands.. That doesn't mean dont live a happy-go-lucky life, its just that the magnitude of change seems like its going to be so much u that you have to know where your going. Hoped this has helped you in some way to be decisicive about your problem.
+1 raves
sundance July 12, 2008 18:45:49

Answered: Make yourself happy
It really depends on your life situation. There are a lot of things that you can do to change a sucky situation...the main one being changing your outlook.
If you elaborate more on what exactly is causing your unhappiness, you will probably get more detailed advice.
For my own part... I plan on moving to a new state and starting my 'own' life when I graduate from school. I'm not running from my problems..but I'm justing trying out something new.
+1 raves
otter -Don't Look Down!! July 09, 2008 19:51:44

Answered: Make yourself happy
do you already have something in mind that you feel led to do regarding making a change? If you're already unhappy and are feeling a 'tap on the shoulder' to do something else - do it.

Even if it means doing it afraid.

My husband and I did it and we are sooo glad we did.
Lizabelle to otter -... July 10, 2008 04:57:07

Yeah, the guy that I'm with now we've been together for 3 years now 4 in Nov. and I've tried so hard to just really take care of him and his friends when they all come over. They are so messy, and only help sometimes, but that's usually only one day out of the week they stay. It kind of bothers me but he doesn't understand because he never cleans up, I do it all. After five or six guys drinking night and day and dealing with my hangovers with more beer. I just kind of want them to quit drinking at our place but we have no where else to go. Kind of aggravating.
+1 raves
otter -... to Lizabelle July 10, 2008 12:26:16

So, the change you are talking about is wanting him to help more around the house and not have drinking there anymore? You're worried if you express theses feelings to him he will leave you?
Lizabelle to otter -... July 11, 2008 02:27:55

No, it's not that at all. Really, I've been finding random things in places that they shouldn't have had any reason to be, and he's laughing at something someone says to him because they give him reasons and excuses to cheat on me when I'm right there. The problem is all the guys I seem to be attracted to no matter how royal they treat me in the beginning, they always turn into a Class A *sshole. I can't find the good ones anymore.
otter -... to Lizabelle July 11, 2008 11:25:27

I am so sorry for that. I have been there before and it is very hard. I hope you can find the strength to do the right thing for YOURSELF. No matter what that might be.
Lizabelle to otter -... July 12, 2008 17:39:35

That's what I don't know. I don't know what I need to do.
+1 raves
otter -... to Lizabelle July 12, 2008 23:24:58

I would bet deep down you already know what you need to do. It's just a matter of when you will do it. I know, it's hard.
+2 raves
Neo July 09, 2008 19:44:29

Answered: Make yourself happy
moderated...
+1 raves
Lizabelle to Neo July 10, 2008 05:53:51

I'm just trying to find my happy ending, ya know.
+1 raves
sd July 09, 2008 07:22:27

Answered: Don't change a thing
I try to make it through....
+1 raves
Lizabelle to sd July 10, 2008 04:46:56

That's what I know I have to do. Sucks, so I need an outlet I guess. Sounds like something my therapist would tell me. I love mosh pits. They help so much.
+1 raves
Rain July 09, 2008 03:08:14

Answered: Undecided
I dunno, good question. I would say change is good. I would think in this case, you wouldnt be able to go back though. Maybe an extended vacation to clear your head. Might work, might not.
+1 raves
Lizabelle to Rain July 10, 2008 04:35:00

That would work, but when you live where I do, everything is tourism, the locals can't do shit for free and there are NO skate parks that I know of anywhere close with gas. I'm a college student so money is so tight. Still need to come up with $3,000 tuition money in 3 weeks. I just think maybe it's stress but then again, I don't know.
+1 raves
Magzilla ~is having a littl... July 09, 2008 02:04:59

Answered: Make yourself happy
Why keep those things if you are not happen
+1 raves
maegan July 09, 2008 01:41:24

Answered: None of the above
i waould find a happy medium cuz u shouldnt live ur life unhappy
+1 raves
Dave Sawyer ♥ Child of God ♥ July 09, 2008 01:39:27

Answered: None of the above
My point of view is that I want to do what God wants. He will see that I get what I truly want and need in its proper time and place. I know we are here in part to learn how to be happy, so if I am unhappy, I ask Him to show me what I am doing or not doing that is keeping me from being happy. My home is just where I happen to live. My love-life, if I had one, would be an eternal relationship, it would not be disposable. I would talk the situation over with her and we would work it out together with God. My job, again, would be a temporary thing that if I could leave if that is what is needed. Change is neither good nor bad in itself. In fact, we need to change once in a while to progress, to prepare us for our future.
Lizabelle to Dave Sa... July 10, 2008 04:37:14

That would be lovely if I had your faith. I want to make things happen for myself instead of wait for someone to help me. It's awesome you have that kind of faith though, good things must happen to you a lot.
+1 raves
Dave Sa... to Lizabelle July 10, 2008 04:39:25

I have been knocked down a few times but I keep getting up, even when I don't think I can.
Lizabelle to Dave Sa... July 10, 2008 05:03:10

Yeah, it does get pretty rough sometimes though. I just hate being completely dependent on someone. It makes me feel vulnerable. I don't like that, and I'm there and so not wanting to change even though I have to. I don't want to give myself up just yet.
+1 raves
RubyTuesday July 09, 2008 01:36:52

Answered: None of the above
moderated...
+1 raves
Lizabelle to RubyTue... July 10, 2008 04:41:52

That's exactly what's going on. I don't like where I am, where I see myself going. I can learn to like it, but I guess I just feel like bi*^*in! a little bit just because. I don't want to have to learn to like something, it just feels like you give a little bit of yourself away.
+1 raves
RubyTue... to Lizabelle July 10, 2008 11:11:45

moderated...
+1 raves
Lizabelle to RubyTue... July 11, 2008 02:35:17

Ever been with someone where it feels like you're talking to a brick wall? I've been with this guy for the past three years, four in Nov., and it was the best relationship I'd been in until two years ago, after that it just really started going. It sucks though because he is the only one I've found to treat me right. Read my conversation with otter. It's really suspicious but everyone says they would never think he'd do it. I'm just really paranoid. It's happened to me before and really broke me.
+1 raves
RubyTue... to Lizabelle July 11, 2008 11:12:36

moderated...
+1 raves
Lizabelle to RubyTue... July 12, 2008 17:51:26

Wow, words fail. I couldn't imagine, that really sucks. Did you ever feel like those years were completely wasted?
+1 raves
RubyTue... to Lizabelle July 12, 2008 18:41:13

moderated...
+1 raves
Lizabelle to RubyTue... July 14, 2008 12:17:35

I know what you mean. Even though I'm not happy with this guy and I've been with him for years, I wouldn't go back and change it for anything.
freewill~STS~freespirit July 09, 2008 01:35:16

Answered: None of the above
moderated...
+1 raves
Boss Hogg~NOBama July 09, 2008 01:34:30

Answered: Make yourself happy
In my experience life is not nearly so dramatic if you don't let it be. Do you really have to change your whole life to find happiness? You may think that's the case, but perhaps there are little ways that you can change to eventually steer your life to a more positive course. Address problems in your life head on, systematically and one by one, and soon you'll find that there's not that many things to be so miserable about.

Do what you will though. Running away should be a last resort!
Lizabelle July 09, 2008 01:34:20

Answered: Undecided
I don't know if I should do what I want and loose my tuition money for college, my apartment, my car, my connection to the world, or just sit back and suck it up and not give a fuck anymore.
Dave Sa... to Lizabelle July 09, 2008 01:40:38

What is it you want to do?
Lizabelle to Dave Sa... July 10, 2008 04:43:00

Change something, anything...Not really sure yet.
+1 raves
Dave Sa... to Lizabelle July 10, 2008 04:47:41

Have you read the Book of Mormon? If not, I challenge you to read ten pages (not including the preface, etc.), and see if you don't feel better.
Lizabelle to Dave Sa... July 10, 2008 05:07:32

Yeah, I hate to tell you this but the step-brother that I had was raised in a Mormon family his Aunt and Uncle actually and he raped me from the time I was three when I met him along with our niece who was only 8 months older than me and was also going to be charged last time I heard for the rape of 2 other girls. I don't think that book could help me. I'm glad it works for you though. Thank you for the offer.
Dave Sa... to Lizabelle July 10, 2008 05:15:34

Well, I know there are bad apples everywhere, even in my own Church, but this is independent of people. I'm not asking you to believe anything, just read it as a novel, if you like. I really think you will feel better. Other than scripture, I prefer reading fiction because with non-fiction, oddly enough, you have to sort out the lies.
Lizabelle to Dave Sa... July 10, 2008 05:18:37

Yup.

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