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Should a husband defend his wife against his mother?

cashmere sweaters 2012/06/18 22:25:23
Related Topics: Husband, Mother
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If a MIL starts to meddle too much, should a husband stand up to his mother if it is upsetting his wife?
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  • Freedom Mom 2012/06/19 02:03:00
    Stand up to mother
    Freedom Mom
    +7
    I think a husband should stand up for his wife as long as she isn't just stirring the pot or causing the problem. I think the husband would know how to handle his mother better and it would keep from putting his wife in an uncomfortable situation. On the other hand my husband hasn't had to do that, my mother-in -law and I were friends before I married my husband. I was lucky.

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Opinions

  • Jackie ... Firefly 2012/06/19 13:58:10
    Jackie G - Poker Playing Patriot
    And if the wife is cruel and wrong??
  • Firefly Jackie ... 2012/06/19 15:48:05
    Firefly
    +3
    A respectful wife would not be cruel,

    and if she is 'wrong' they should discuss it privately...
  • Caedus01 Sith Lord of the P... 2012/06/19 00:21:11
    Stand up to mother
    Caedus01 Sith Lord of the PHAET
    +4
    Better him than her. If she says the wrong thing it could get very ugly
  • sally 2012/06/19 00:11:24
    Stand up to mother
    sally
    +4
    He's married now and should put all his affection and attention towards his wife...Not his mommy.
  • Jackie ... sally 2012/06/19 13:57:12
    Jackie G - Poker Playing Patriot
    All - no; affection - yes; attention-yes and his mother deserves some of those too just as her mother deserves those too
  • bricklyn Jackie ... 2012/06/20 00:43:27
    bricklyn
    +1
    There is nothing she 'deserves' in the marriage of her son. She need to allow them to be married and enjoy their lives. When she does that she will gain respect and be able to share instead of being demanding.
  • Jackie ... bricklyn 2012/06/20 01:42:06
    Jackie G - Poker Playing Patriot
    I disagree - hard to imagine a son or daughter so callous as to think that a parent should be treated badly but I suppose there are people who are so insecure that they are not happy being part of a families.
  • TygaLuv XO :-* 2012/06/18 23:51:02
    leave it between them
    TygaLuv XO :-*
    +1
    It really depends on who is right
  • Cat 1017 2012/06/18 23:43:58
    leave it between them
    Cat 1017
    +1
    Depends on who is right....
  • Doreen 2012/06/18 23:39:50
    Stand up to mother
    Doreen
    +3
    The husband CHOSE to be with his wife and needs to act like that.
  • Nam Era Vet #1 DNA TLC 2012/06/18 23:37:33
    Stand up to mother
    Nam Era Vet #1 DNA TLC
  • Boris Badinov 2012/06/18 23:33:19
    Stand up to mother
    Boris Badinov
    +7
    His wife is where his loyalty goes.
  • jgh57 2012/06/18 23:28:01
    Stand up to mother
    jgh57
    +2
    This is very tricky but if Mom is wrong you should always stand by your wife.
  • Dwight 2012/06/18 23:09:56
    Stand up to mother
    Dwight
    +5
    I expect my wife to be around after mom is expired.

    Besides, my wife does most of the cooking around here.

    And I taught her to shoot.
  • Azrael-... Dwight 2012/06/19 01:59:45
    Azrael-In GOD we trust
    +3
    If you taught her to shoot, you better stick up for her! Ha! Ha! Just kidding.
  • Dwight Azrael-... 2012/06/19 03:39:08
    Dwight
    +1
    Oh, man! she can shoot almost as well as I do. 9 of ten in the inner ring consistantly.
  • Azrael-... Dwight 2012/06/20 00:22:16
    Azrael-In GOD we trust
    +1
    Whoa, now that's good. My husband and I used to shoot when I was married to him.
    It's a great activity for folks.
  • bricklyn Dwight 2012/06/19 06:06:04
    bricklyn
    +1
    I just love the last line......
  • Dwight bricklyn 2012/06/19 19:21:34
    Dwight
    Just be careful how you play with that one. :{)
  • bricklyn Dwight 2012/06/20 00:45:50
    bricklyn
    +1
    I live in Canada, we do not play with guns here.
  • Dwight bricklyn 2012/06/20 14:53:44
    Dwight
    I would strongly advise anyone to never "play" with a gun. I'd rather play with a rattle snake.

    A gun is a tool, a weapon, not a toy.
  • Gracie - Proud Conservative 2012/06/18 23:06:54
    Stand up to mother
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    +7
    LOL, if you only knew my mother-in-law! She's mean like a rattlesnake. My husband doesn't have to stand up for me, I do a fine job of it myself! She'd love for me to go off and die somewhere but I am determined to outlive her! She referred to me as "she" the other day!
  • Freedom... Gracie ... 2012/06/19 01:41:46 (edited)
    Freedom Mom
    +3
    Sorry to hear about that sweetheart. All your mother-in-law is doing is digging her own grave, because when she gets out of hand, your husband will lose respect for her in the long run.
  • Gracie ... Freedom... 2012/06/19 03:17:26
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    +2
    She's been like that her whole life. His parents were married exactly 65 years and he died on their anniversary...he couldn't take one more day with her. They fought like animals their whole marriage, every day. I can't tell you the damage they've done to their children. My husband is the dutiful son that does what he can for her knowing she'll never change, she'll never be respectful and she'll never be thankful for anything. She said that she's never said anything that she ever had to be sorry for, you must have just taken it wrong. She still tells them every day what a sorry SOB their father was. She's an angry, angry woman. I've never seen anything like it. When she says something really mean to me I just laugh it off. You can't really take that kind of venom seriously. My husband and I never fight and I've shown him that you can have a good marriage and respect each other. Funny thing is, her sister is a wonderful warm woman who never says anything bad to anyone.
  • Freedom... Gracie ... 2012/06/19 03:46:32 (edited)
    Freedom Mom
    +2
    Well it sound like she has a big problem and you are showing her its not going to be your problem that she is beside the point.
  • Azrael-... Gracie ... 2012/06/19 02:00:47
    Azrael-In GOD we trust
    +2
    I know exactly where you're coming from. I know someone just like that.
  • Gracie ... Azrael-... 2012/06/19 03:17:49
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    +3
    Oh my, there's more than one? LOL!
  • Azrael-... Gracie ... 2012/06/20 00:25:00
    Azrael-In GOD we trust
    +1
    Sad to tell ya, Gracie, yep, there is. I stay away from that thing as much as I can.
  • Jackie ... Gracie ... 2012/06/19 14:00:45
    Jackie G - Poker Playing Patriot
    +1
    How awful - my mother-in-law is the sweetest lady on earth and all her sons (3) treat all women with respect and they adore her. My hubby is so kind and thoughtful and I credit her kindness as the training ground for his treatment of others
  • Gracie ... Jackie ... 2012/06/19 16:34:17
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    +1
    I told my husband that he's proof that two negatives can create a positive. He is nothing like either one of his parents or he wouldn't be my husband! I can't imagine what it's like to have a nice mother-in-law.
  • Jackie ... Gracie ... 2012/06/19 20:05:35
    Jackie G - Poker Playing Patriot
    +1
    It is wonderful - I swear I could give her the cat box and she would say how nice I was to think of her needing something to keep her from slipping on the steps. She will be 108 next month and it is hard for me to think of her going at some point - lovely lady
  • Gracie ... Jackie ... 2012/06/20 00:33:33
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    +1
    Wow, 108! I guess your husband has some longevity!
  • Jackie ... Gracie ... 2012/06/20 01:43:42
    Jackie G - Poker Playing Patriot
    +1
    Yes, they live to great ages. My family - we can have a family reunion in a small closet and get drunk on a 6 pack. LOL I have told him that if he marries some young hussy that I will haunt him. Snort.

    ghost
  • Gracie ... Jackie ... 2012/06/20 01:55:40
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    +1
    I told my husband if he marries someone and loses my pension, I'd haunt him! LOL!
  • JesusIs... Gracie ... 2012/06/19 21:26:39 (edited)
    JesusIsMyGod
    +1
    Bummer. I will pray for you.
  • Gracie ... JesusIs... 2012/06/20 00:33:48
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    Thanks, I pray for her every night!
  • Phyl *In God i Trust* 2012/06/18 23:04:47
    Stand up to mother
    Phyl *In God i Trust*
    +3
    yes if he loves her he would/.
  • starguide 2012/06/18 23:03:16
    leave it between them
    starguide
    if the wife is right,,, stand up for your wife
  • bricklyn starguide 2012/06/19 06:07:45
    bricklyn
    +1
    Unfortunately, men who have lived with the standards their mother taught them usually think their mother is right.
  • Fighting4U 2012/06/18 22:46:59
    Stand up to mother
    Fighting4U

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