1. Yes, my first crush was on my friend Kenny, back when I was really little. I told him, he told his dad, his dad told mine and trouble from there on out...
2. I just talk and if someone hears the "accent" it's not intentional.
3. Yes and Yes, but it's true not all gay guys do this.
4.Some like the style...the dude from the Cure isn't gay but he does the same thing. It's a nice look, I think..
5. Some just feel comfortable like so, I'd assume. I'm not a Lesbian..
6. No.
7. I watch straight porn sometimes, but it's to see the men. Fantasy is, I'm in the womens place and hes doing that to me.
8. Why does anyone seek a relationship? To be loved and give love in return.
9.Yes and yes
10. Yes.
11.Not Bi
12. Not Bi
Questionaire for Gays/Lesbians/Bis
Toby
2011/10/17 20:38:08
I'm a straight person who would like to better understand gay people , there are so many things I would like to ask gay people but never really could because I don't really know any
But on this site there seems to be plenty of gay people who could answer some questions
(No offense is intended by any of these questions)
So without further ado.....
1.As a straight guy , I have had crushes on girls as far back as I can possibly even remember (4). Did you have homosexual crushes going as far back as you can remember?
2.That voice that gay men are famous for... you know the one.... is that REALLY your default speaking voice? You're not actually TRYING to sound like that are you?
3.Gay men : Would or have you actually done anal with another man?
(I've heard not all gay men do that)
4.If gay men are attracted to men , then why is it that many of you try to make yourselves as close to looking like women as possible? (Ex : Adam Lambert)
5.If lesbians are attracted to women , then why is it that many of them try to make themselves look as close to boys as possible? (Ex : Ellen Degeneres)
6.If you consider yourself fully gay or fully lesbian (and not bi) , would you really NEVER willingly have heterosexual relations?
7.What happens if a gay person watches porn of the opposite gender? For instance could a gay man really just sit there watching an attractive woman go to town on themselves in an adult film for a while without becoming aroused at all?
8.Why do gays seek out relationships? As the saying goes why go buy milk if you have a cow......?
9.Does your family know your gay? If so , do they resent you at all for it?
10.Do you actually care if marriage is legal for you or not? Spending your life with your partner outside of a legally sanctioned document just isn't the same?
11.Question for Bi-sexuals : Is your straight to gay ratio like 50/50 , or is it like 90/10 , or 10/90? Is it really equal or do you lean more to one side?
12.Another question for Bi-sexuals : Even though your bi , do you plan to marry heterosexually so that you can have your own children one day? Or are you really just as happy with the idea of being in a gay marriage and adopting?
Please answer any/all questions that apply to you and again I don't mean to offend anyone with any of these questions even if maybe the wording on some of them might come across that way
But on this site there seems to be plenty of gay people who could answer some questions
(No offense is intended by any of these questions)
So without further ado.....
1.As a straight guy , I have had crushes on girls as far back as I can possibly even remember (4). Did you have homosexual crushes going as far back as you can remember?
2.That voice that gay men are famous for... you know the one.... is that REALLY your default speaking voice? You're not actually TRYING to sound like that are you?
3.Gay men : Would or have you actually done anal with another man?
(I've heard not all gay men do that)
4.If gay men are attracted to men , then why is it that many of you try to make yourselves as close to looking like women as possible? (Ex : Adam Lambert)
5.If lesbians are attracted to women , then why is it that many of them try to make themselves look as close to boys as possible? (Ex : Ellen Degeneres)
6.If you consider yourself fully gay or fully lesbian (and not bi) , would you really NEVER willingly have heterosexual relations?
7.What happens if a gay person watches porn of the opposite gender? For instance could a gay man really just sit there watching an attractive woman go to town on themselves in an adult film for a while without becoming aroused at all?
8.Why do gays seek out relationships? As the saying goes why go buy milk if you have a cow......?
9.Does your family know your gay? If so , do they resent you at all for it?
10.Do you actually care if marriage is legal for you or not? Spending your life with your partner outside of a legally sanctioned document just isn't the same?
11.Question for Bi-sexuals : Is your straight to gay ratio like 50/50 , or is it like 90/10 , or 10/90? Is it really equal or do you lean more to one side?
12.Another question for Bi-sexuals : Even though your bi , do you plan to marry heterosexually so that you can have your own children one day? Or are you really just as happy with the idea of being in a gay marriage and adopting?
Please answer any/all questions that apply to you and again I don't mean to offend anyone with any of these questions even if maybe the wording on some of them might come across that way
9. My close family knows about my bisexuality, although only my mother accepts it. My father told me that I was supposed to wait until no guys wanted me anymore and then go bisexual....I try not to let him get to me, but I've lost all the respect I have for him.
10. Although I am not a lesbian, I do believe it would matter to me if I couldn't marry my life partner just because of our gender. It would because marriage is the number one way to express your love for each other and it gives you legal rights to choose medical decisions if your partner cannot.
11. Mine's more like 40/60. I tend to lean more towards the girl side, but only because of how many guys have lied, cheated, or just broke my heart. Although, right now I have a boyfriend and I am extremely happy with him.
12. I haven't really thought about the subject of children much, I would be just as comfortable adopting as I would having my own child.
2. I'm a girl
3.I'm a girl
4.I'm a girl
5. I dont know, I am still very feminine though most lesbians I know do dress very much like a man, I think its just because they feel like a man. You could ask the same question to straight men- why do you dress like a man even though you are attracted to girls....because you are a man.
6.I'm bi
7. Well personally, even though I'm bi I actually would find watching a guy mastebating very disgusting, not so on a girl though but I see your point. I am still very much attracted to guys
8. Because everyone wants to be loved. Its not as though, as a girl, think "I would love a girlfriend, actually, no I'm a girl and thats equally as good."
9. Well, I sort if came out and never spoke to my dad about it (my mum told him) and technically my sister told my mum. But I guess I kinda went back in the closet...I never talk about it with my family, or acted upon it (I'm still quite young..) so they sort of assume 'm now straight. I'm too scared to come out..again it was bad enough first time
10. I think I would only think of it as official if I got married. I guess marriage to either gender is one of my dreams and goals in life so I definitely want to get married.
11. My gay : straight ratio is pro...
2. I'm a girl
3.I'm a girl
4.I'm a girl
5. I dont know, I am still very feminine though most lesbians I know do dress very much like a man, I think its just because they feel like a man. You could ask the same question to straight men- why do you dress like a man even though you are attracted to girls....because you are a man.
6.I'm bi
7. Well personally, even though I'm bi I actually would find watching a guy mastebating very disgusting, not so on a girl though but I see your point. I am still very much attracted to guys
8. Because everyone wants to be loved. Its not as though, as a girl, think "I would love a girlfriend, actually, no I'm a girl and thats equally as good."
9. Well, I sort if came out and never spoke to my dad about it (my mum told him) and technically my sister told my mum. But I guess I kinda went back in the closet...I never talk about it with my family, or acted upon it (I'm still quite young..) so they sort of assume 'm now straight. I'm too scared to come out..again it was bad enough first time
10. I think I would only think of it as official if I got married. I guess marriage to either gender is one of my dreams and goals in life so I definitely want to get married.
11. My gay : straight ratio is probably 40:60...
12. Well, my other life goal is to have tons of kids and I really would love to get pregnant,therefore I see myself in the future in a hetrosexual relationship. Though I can also see myself in a lesbian relationship...I dunno, we'll see, I just have to meet the right person and then decide. I would be fine with adoption though :)
2.I think some gay guys just naturally speak that way.However,not all of them speak that way.
3.I am not a gay man.I have heard not all of them do that.If I were a gay man, I would never do anal because it sounds gross.
4.It's because some gay boys are just more comfortable dressing that way.
5.It's because some of them just like dressing that way.
7.If a gay person watched porn of the opposite gender they would probably only get aroused by the person of the same gender.
8.Gays seek out relationships for the same reason why straights do.They want to love and be loved.
10. I am not sure if I want to get married.However,if a person wants to put a ring on it who are we to deny them?
11.Some bisexuals are just 50/50.Some lean to one side more than the other.It depends on the person.
12. Some see themselves marrying the opposite gender.Some see themselves marrying the same gender.Some see themselves marrying the person they fall in love with whether it be with a man or a woman.As I said,it depends on the person.
I am glad that you want to learn more about LGB people because knowledge is the first step to eliminating ignorance.
One more thing,you forgot to ask questions about those who are transgender/transvestite/gend...
2. I don't have a stereotypically gay voice, but my voice has always been someone high-pitched and more effeminate-sounding. As a middle-schooler, I would get mistaken for a girl on the phone. I can't speak any other way than I do.
3. I have not done it and I don't know if I would do it. Part of me is put off by it.
4. I can appreciate femininity in men, though not to the point of looking exactly like a woman. Most gay people I know look like just any other gay and many transvestites are straight; it's just the stereotypical gay guys that make it into the media and reach the masses and thus give most people a distorted view on what gay people are like.
5. Same answer as above, but switch the gender terms.
6. I might. I'm not turned off by the idea of sex with a girl, it just doesn't sexually arouse me.
7. He might. Could you watch two guys going at it and never be aroused? Girl-on-girl porn does nothing for me.
8. Why do straight people seek out relationships? Why do you assume that gay people are more interested in sex than straight people? I'll say it again: the only difference betwee...
2. I don't have a stereotypically gay voice, but my voice has always been someone high-pitched and more effeminate-sounding. As a middle-schooler, I would get mistaken for a girl on the phone. I can't speak any other way than I do.
3. I have not done it and I don't know if I would do it. Part of me is put off by it.
4. I can appreciate femininity in men, though not to the point of looking exactly like a woman. Most gay people I know look like just any other gay and many transvestites are straight; it's just the stereotypical gay guys that make it into the media and reach the masses and thus give most people a distorted view on what gay people are like.
5. Same answer as above, but switch the gender terms.
6. I might. I'm not turned off by the idea of sex with a girl, it just doesn't sexually arouse me.
7. He might. Could you watch two guys going at it and never be aroused? Girl-on-girl porn does nothing for me.
8. Why do straight people seek out relationships? Why do you assume that gay people are more interested in sex than straight people? I'll say it again: the only difference between my sexuality and yours is the gender of the people I'm attracted to. Otherwise, my ability to love, the importance of sex, etc. it's all the same. And I personally have a low sex drive, so sex is not even that important to me.
9. My family knows I'm gay and they are fully supportive, as I knew they would be.
10. I support gay marriage on principle. I might never want to get married, but there is no reason why gay people should be barred form a secular legal institution. Religious institutions can refuse to perform gay marriages as they wish; that is their choice.
I have to admit, I found question 8 a bit offensive if you were taking it to imply that gay people only care about sex. It shouldn't be difficult to take your sexuality and replace the gender with men and leave everything else the same. That truly is how it is for me and most other gay people I've known.
1. Well, I wanted to marry one of my female friends when I was about 4.....
5. Beats me. I dress like such a freaking girly girl and I'm attracted to womanly women. That said, one of my good friends dresses in a somewhat manly way because it's just how she feels comfortable. And she rocks it pretty darn well.
8. Why do straight people seek out relationships? There's something wonderful about loving and being loved that relationships provide. It's not just about sex--well, sure it is for some people, but only in as much as straight relationships are all about sex. That depends on the individual.
9. Some of my family knows I'm bi--my mother and my sister. My sister is massively supportive and sometimes even a bit over-enthusiastic. My mother claims she doesn't care, but anyone who brings it up can tell that's a lie, because she flips the hell out and starts screaming to quit talking about it because she doesn't care. Yeah. Not very happy about it. Ah well, at least she didn't kick me out or anything.
10. If they can find a way to somehow give gays, lesbians, and bisexuals who are in love with someone of the same gender the same tax benefits and visitation rights, right to adopt children together, ect. that straight ...
1. Well, I wanted to marry one of my female friends when I was about 4.....
5. Beats me. I dress like such a freaking girly girl and I'm attracted to womanly women. That said, one of my good friends dresses in a somewhat manly way because it's just how she feels comfortable. And she rocks it pretty darn well.
8. Why do straight people seek out relationships? There's something wonderful about loving and being loved that relationships provide. It's not just about sex--well, sure it is for some people, but only in as much as straight relationships are all about sex. That depends on the individual.
9. Some of my family knows I'm bi--my mother and my sister. My sister is massively supportive and sometimes even a bit over-enthusiastic. My mother claims she doesn't care, but anyone who brings it up can tell that's a lie, because she flips the hell out and starts screaming to quit talking about it because she doesn't care. Yeah. Not very happy about it. Ah well, at least she didn't kick me out or anything.
10. If they can find a way to somehow give gays, lesbians, and bisexuals who are in love with someone of the same gender the same tax benefits and visitation rights, right to adopt children together, ect. that straight married couples have, then great. That's not going to happen. Ergo, marriage should be legal. On a personal level, I have always wanted to get married someday, and if I wind up with a girl, I'd want that same opportunity.
11. That's an interesting thing, with me. Okay. If I am single and I am not interested in anyone in particular, then yes, it's about 50/50. If I have a crush on someone or I am dating someone, I lean more towards the gender of the person I am interested in. Right now I'm dating a man and am slightly more interested in men--it runs about 60/40 right now, if I were to quantify it. Before my current boyfriend I was head-over-heels for one of my (sadly straight) female friends, and was MUCH more interested in women than men--maybe 70/30 at that point in time.
12. I plan to marry the person I fall in love with, who loves me, whom I can see myself spending my life with, who can see themselves spending their lives with me. That sort of feeling would have to last several years of dating before marriage. That's the important part of marriage to me--love and ability to live with each other for life. I don't really factor in gender with it.
2) well my natural response is that NO ONE talks like that, but they have talked like that for so long that it is natural, but i know this young gay boy who has the most southern gay voice i have ever heard and im sure its not fake.
3) I'm a lesbian so ill save this one for the gay boys :)
4) I don't think that is a man trying to look like a woman((unless putting on an act for a drag show)) so much as it is him just wearing what makes him comfortable.
5) Again, its not women trying to look like men, that is just how they feel comfortable. And not all lesbians are butch, there are many different styles:: fem, lipstick lesbian etc.. just like with straight people everyone has a different style
6) I am definitely a lesbian but i am not a fortune teller so i dont know if i will never be with a guy but i doubt it because i am not attracted to men at all.
7) Idk, but i know that lesbians scenes in movies are hot to me, but straight scenes are not at all. Sometimes they are cute, when two people are really in love but its not arousing..
8) seek our relationships?? People just try to do what makes them happy. People like to be with people, straight people do the same thing, Its not seeking out, its just trying to be happy.
9) Yes they...
2) well my natural response is that NO ONE talks like that, but they have talked like that for so long that it is natural, but i know this young gay boy who has the most southern gay voice i have ever heard and im sure its not fake.
3) I'm a lesbian so ill save this one for the gay boys :)
4) I don't think that is a man trying to look like a woman((unless putting on an act for a drag show)) so much as it is him just wearing what makes him comfortable.
5) Again, its not women trying to look like men, that is just how they feel comfortable. And not all lesbians are butch, there are many different styles:: fem, lipstick lesbian etc.. just like with straight people everyone has a different style
6) I am definitely a lesbian but i am not a fortune teller so i dont know if i will never be with a guy but i doubt it because i am not attracted to men at all.
7) Idk, but i know that lesbians scenes in movies are hot to me, but straight scenes are not at all. Sometimes they are cute, when two people are really in love but its not arousing..
8) seek our relationships?? People just try to do what makes them happy. People like to be with people, straight people do the same thing, Its not seeking out, its just trying to be happy.
9) Yes they know, and no they do not resent me
10) Well i want to get married when that time comes and its ridiculous that gay people can't get married just because they are gay.. that doesnt even make sense to me.. I can't make sense of it to be honest.
11) Bisexuality -_-
12) .....
Referring to #3 , does it gross you out at all or are you completely unphased and non-disgusted by anal?
2. I don't know if you me voice or the way we talk? In the way of talking I sometimes have
it
3. Yes I have.
4. Not all look like women. Don't use Adam Lambert as the example of all gay men.
5. N/A
6. Before I truly found out who I am. I did date a female.
7. I do look at the guy. I would not look at straight porn.
8. I want love not just sex. Straight people also do the same.
9.Yes my family knows. My sister has no problem. My mom love me, but her husband
don't like me. My farther says that I am adult
10. I do want to get married. If I can't get married, my church do Holy Union. Ether way I
will never leave him.
2. I dont make a voice like that
3. Yes I have, but not with every man I had sex with
4. There are masculin Gays and feminine Gays. THere is a connection between gender identity and sexual preference
6. Before I came out, I tried relations with girls as well. The sex just didnt work with girls
7. I think women are beautiful, but not exciting. I dont get aroused at all.
9. yes, they know
10. its a matter of having the same rights. I dont see any rational reason why we should not be allowed to marry
6. I've had Heterosexual Relationships, Back Before I came out. But Now I probably would Never have one, I'm Not Attracted to men, So there's no reason to be in a relationship with one.
8.Gays "seek" out Relationships Just as Much as straight people. People Just want Companionship, and Someone to love, and to Love them back. It has nothing to do with Sexual Orientation, or just wanting sex.
9.My family knows, They Don't Resent me For it, Most My Family is Fine with it, My Mom, Still doesn't really Like it, and Occasionally tried to make it seem like I'm straight.
10.Yes. One Civil Unions, Don't give the Same Rights as "Marriage", and I've Always Dreamed of Having a Wedding Since I was Little. It's Not like Gays Getting Married is going to cause the apocalypse.
2. I don't think it's something really controlled by people. I know plenty who don't have that kind of speaking voice unless they're uber excited about something.
4. Some men do because they feel like girls trapped in male bodies and would rather make themselves look the way they feel.
5. Again, some women feel like men in a woman's body and want to be more like that.
9. My family knows I'm bisexual. My mom's fine with it even though it's not her thing and my brother thinks I'm lying and that I'm "better than that"
10. I think that it should be available to the couples that want to enter into it. Just to have the option.
11. For me I tend to date guys more often than women just because my type is hard to find where I live and they're usually straight. I'd say it's 51/49 in favor of men though.
12. I plan on having a life with children etc. and whether it's with a woman or a man isn't a major factor. If I'm madly in love with a woman I'm not going to marry a man to have my own kids just for the sake of having them however.
1. Yeah, I have. On alot, but none of them were my type.
4. ADAM LAMBERT?!?! OMJ I <3 HIM!!! Sorry--not the qeustion...
2. You must be talking about the one that makes us sound so "obivious". I do pretty well keeping that in check, unless I am really agitated or emotional... the only time I really "CAMP it up" is when I am with the rest of my gay friends and we are just having fun.
3.I have yes, and you are right some men don't... others do... guess it is all a matter of what makes ya happy.
4.Can't officially comment on that one, cause that isn't my thing.
5.N/A
6.I was married to a woman for 16 years, we had relations, and I have 4 wonderful children because of that, I was trying to "fix" myself with that marriage, but eventually discovered you can't fix what isn't broken.
7.It usually makes me rather ill...if you wanna know the truth....
8.In my life, it is for the same reason Straight people want relationships..... it's not all about sex, it is companionship, someone to look forward to seeing when you get home, and someone to just share the good and bad things that happen in a day.
9.My parents never knew, or if they did never said anything about it. (They passed away before I ever "Came out") My youngest sister was ok with it, but my other two sis...
2. You must be talking about the one that makes us sound so "obivious". I do pretty well keeping that in check, unless I am really agitated or emotional... the only time I really "CAMP it up" is when I am with the rest of my gay friends and we are just having fun.
3.I have yes, and you are right some men don't... others do... guess it is all a matter of what makes ya happy.
4.Can't officially comment on that one, cause that isn't my thing.
5.N/A
6.I was married to a woman for 16 years, we had relations, and I have 4 wonderful children because of that, I was trying to "fix" myself with that marriage, but eventually discovered you can't fix what isn't broken.
7.It usually makes me rather ill...if you wanna know the truth....
8.In my life, it is for the same reason Straight people want relationships..... it's not all about sex, it is companionship, someone to look forward to seeing when you get home, and someone to just share the good and bad things that happen in a day.
9.My parents never knew, or if they did never said anything about it. (They passed away before I ever "Came out") My youngest sister was ok with it, but my other two sisters no longer want anything to do with me. Oh well... it is ok... I am a better person now cause I can be honest with myself when I look in the mirror.
10. I really don't care about "marriage" per se, I do feel that couples should be afforded the same rights and benefits (tax deductions, hospital visitation rights, etc) as others. But I don't need a silly piece of paper to tell me that I can love someone or not. (And I am still single, but maybe not forever.)
11.N/A 100% gay here.
12.Same as #11.
Thank you for asking these questions, and as I can only speak for my self on here, Nothing you have said or asked offended me in any way. If you ever have more questions please don't hesitate to ask, I don't mind sharing with open minded people who really have things they want to know. The ones that are just out to tell me how wrong I am just cause I don't see things their way are the ones who make me upset.
Thats kind of strange sounding , going off your answer to #7 , I would have to wonder how you even got it up those minimum of 4 times (Probably honestly way more than that) to make your kids you mentioned in #6? That seems like some kind of paradox or something
2. I just talk and if someone hears the "accent" it's not intentional.
3. Yes and Yes, but it's true not all gay guys do this.
4.Some like the style...the dude from the Cure isn't gay but he does the same thing. It's a nice look, I think..
5. Some just feel comfortable like so, I'd assume. I'm not a Lesbian..
6. No.
7. I watch straight porn sometimes, but it's to see the men. Fantasy is, I'm in the womens place and hes doing that to me.
8. Why does anyone seek a relationship? To be loved and give love in return.
9.Yes and yes
10. Yes.
11.Not Bi
12. Not Bi
Question #1 is the most important question to me because seeing Yes on that just confirms what I already thought , that people are in fact born gay , and you did say yes
(I'd honestly be very suprised if someone said no to that question but then claimed to be gay)
Your answer on #7 was very intruiging
and thats too bad about the second yes on #9 :/
For 7, it's been like so when I first watched porn. I rarely at all watch it now.
As for the 2nd yes, some not all of my family is like this. Thankfully my Dad has accepted me and we've got a great relationship after some tough times when I came out to him.