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PUBLIC OPINION > Women Are More Attracted to Jerks

Living 2012/05/21 13:00:00
You know the old addage, "Nice guys finish last." Well, the converse is also said to be true... "Jerks finish first." Especially when it comes to love. (Or at least illusory love.) We don't need to present you with "recent studies" to convince you that jerks often come out ahead with the ladies. From imaginary a-holes (James Bond, Don Draper) to real-life reprobates (Charlie Sheen, Jesse James), it seems like the odds are stacked in their favor. We asked the public if it was true.



Unfortunately for you sweethearts out there, most people feel that women are, in fact, attracted to a-holes. Why is that? There could be a variety of reasons. Some suggested it's the result of a woman's relationship with her father; some point to low self-esteem. Others pointed out that guys who are physically attractive are naturally more able to get away with it.

Men Are Convinced

Not surprisingly, men were way more likely to think women go for jerks. Many female commenters blamed it on "other women," but one admitted, "I'm attracted to that kind of person, guy or girl actually. But, I wouldn't stay with them. Yeah, it can be exciting to be with them, but in the long run, I normally find their personality disgusting and break it off."

Drinkers Don't Deny It

What do James Bond and Don Draper have in common? A stiff drink, among other things. However, we're not saying alcohol has anything to do with being a jerk. In fact, if drinkers are more likely to think women are attracted to jerks, it might suggest that drinkers are a bit resigned to the idea. Maybe spending time in a bar, as a nice guy or a jerk, it rings more true.

First-Hand Experience

The demographic that was most convinced that women are attracted to jerks was the divorcees. That should be telling. Presumably, most divorcees have come to a significant negative conclusion about someone they were once very fond of. Based on the results of this poll, there's a good chance that conclusion has something to do with the topic at hand.

If you'd like to vote on this question, dig deeper into the demographics, or engage in existing discussion about the topic, visit our poll about jerks. We'd love to hear from you!
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Top Opinion

  • ReindeerWS6 2012/05/22 00:19:52
    ReindeerWS6
    +9
    A lot of good points in the comments section. My definition of a jerk in this case is a man that disrespects a woman... and yes it goes the other way too.

    Self-confidence is sexy... I really don't care so much of what a person looks like as much as their inner qualities and how they carry themselves. People who are happy and successful in life also tend to have a good level of self-confidence and self-esteem. If this is what is considered to be a "jerk", then yes it's not very hard to see why men and women would be attracted to these types. However, self-confidence does NOT mean a big-ego; or a nasty, manipulative, and abusive personality. To me those are the real jerks.

    Also being self confident does not mean that a man can't be "nice" to a woman and sensitive to her feelings. What it DOES mean is that the man sets healthy boundaries for himself and doesn't tolerate someone stepping over those boundaries w/o good reason.

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  • rph3636 Gerald 2012/05/22 04:42:09
    rph3636
    Hmmmm, I wonder why I find myself agreeing with that so much.
  • 214scifi Gerald 2012/05/25 02:39:23
    214scifi
    HA HA!
  • 214scifi 2012/05/22 02:57:08
    214scifi
    +1
    Really it's that they don't want a wimpy, whiney guy. They want a guy who appears together and in control. And someone who makes them laugh.
  • Skooter 2012/05/22 02:48:50
  • ★misfit★ 2012/05/22 02:39:46
    ★misfit★
    +3
    It's not that women like to be treated badly or are truly more attracted to bad personalities. That's B.S. But it does SEEM like women prefer jerks because we are attracted to confidence and good looks. And confidence plus good looks tends to equal an arrogant, "jerky" personality. So basically it's not that women pursue jerks, it's that men quickly get a big head and become jerks when pursued by many women.
  • Daniel 2012/05/22 02:01:55
    Daniel
    +1
    Killing them softly :)
    All about the smile, have to seem interested.
    But you can tell when a girl is into you just by a look.
  • Yaati 2012/05/22 01:37:34
    Yaati
    +1
    Hey! Is that Dave Franco in the picture? HI DAVE FRANCO!
  • FanOreilly 2012/05/22 01:27:39
    FanOreilly
    +3
    I am a jerk and women love me.

    Thanks ladies!
  • dominic... FanOreilly 2012/05/22 02:53:30
    dominic garcia
    +1
    Nahhhhhhhhh you are not a jerk! Yes, we do love you!
  • GLaDOS 2012/05/22 01:23:56 (edited)
    GLaDOS
    +4
    I still say it's not "jerks" women are attracted to, but men with an appearance of confidence, which jerks tend to have in abundance. I do like "bad boys," but "bad boy" doesn't necessarily equate to "jerk."

    What is a "jerk?" Who are fictional "jerks." Not all versions of 007 are what I would consider "jerks."

    I'm going to use movie/animated/comic references, because that's what I know:
    Batman could be considered a "jerk," but he has more fans that Superman, or at least more "vocal" fans, who tends to be far more upright and "good."

    The Question also could be considered a "jerk." I adore him, though.


    Jack Sparrow could easily be considered a "jerk." I mean, he leaves the woman he claims to be in love with on an island? And he toys with another guy's girl.
    Iron Man... just... Iron Man.
    I won't even touch the Prince Zuko fanbase, which spans all ages, even into adulthood.
    House. Definitely a jerk, but a brilliant jerk, which allows many people to overlook that jerk quality.

    Heck, we can go "Classical Period" on this and talk about the mythology of Aphrodite (a married woman) and Ares. Zeus was a huge jerk, too, and got TONS of play.
  • robbt1 GLaDOS 2012/05/22 05:13:31
    robbt1
    +1
    Question's not a jerk. He's a weirdo.
  • robbt1 GLaDOS 2012/05/22 05:17:47 (edited)
    robbt1
    +1
    And Iron Man... isn't a jerk. He's a DOUCHE. And I say this as someone who's been a Marvel Comics fan since I could read. Iron Man is the biggest douchebag in the history of Douchebaggery. And in the comics, his douchiness helps cause a war between superheros that gets Captain America shot in the back of the head. Tony Stark is a BASTARD.

    And ladies love him. Which proves my point.
  • GLaDOS robbt1 2012/05/22 11:44:49 (edited)
    GLaDOS
    +1
    It all depends on what you consider a "jerk."

    If we go by the dictionary definition of "an unlikable person," then Question could be to someone. I adore him, but he's certainly an acquired taste, for those of us who, like Huntress, are drawn to "eccentric charm."

    As for Tony Stark, he's certainly unlikable. Though, the primary reason he likely gets tons of women is the fact that he's rich and powerful. Rather like how most guys will overlook a crappy personality if a girl's hot, a woman will forgive a lot of things if a guy is a prize outside of his personality (status, looks, etc.).

    If we go by the Jerk Index and All Girls Want Bad Boys on tvtropes, well, the list gets considerably longer, or considerably shorter as it becomes much less of a "Your Mileage may Vary" type deal.
  • retrograve robbt1 2012/05/22 22:31:28
    retrograve
    "He's a cool exec with a heart steal...."
  • rockyjr5 2012/05/22 00:53:49
    rockyjr5
    +1
    The only reason why they do is because they don't want to wait for a guy of their dreams to come so they want to just get with any guy just to say that they have a boyfriend, and that's okay, however they're taking an 60% chance that the guy will treat her like trash.
  • Garciataria 2012/05/22 00:24:26
    Garciataria
    +1
    ... and I don't understand why. Whenever I see a woman say she is more attracted to jerks, I feel like I have to change my personality (which has always been chivalrous and being respectful of women) just to increase my chances at a girlfriend.
  • GLaDOS Garciat... 2012/05/22 01:25:45
    GLaDOS
    +1
    As I said in the original question, you don't really have to change your personality all that much, you just need to make sure you have a spine, and are interesting.
  • ReindeerWS6 2012/05/22 00:19:52
    ReindeerWS6
    +9
    A lot of good points in the comments section. My definition of a jerk in this case is a man that disrespects a woman... and yes it goes the other way too.

    Self-confidence is sexy... I really don't care so much of what a person looks like as much as their inner qualities and how they carry themselves. People who are happy and successful in life also tend to have a good level of self-confidence and self-esteem. If this is what is considered to be a "jerk", then yes it's not very hard to see why men and women would be attracted to these types. However, self-confidence does NOT mean a big-ego; or a nasty, manipulative, and abusive personality. To me those are the real jerks.

    Also being self confident does not mean that a man can't be "nice" to a woman and sensitive to her feelings. What it DOES mean is that the man sets healthy boundaries for himself and doesn't tolerate someone stepping over those boundaries w/o good reason.
  • sherie Reindee... 2012/05/22 21:02:55
    sherie
    Well said.
  • Nintaku 2012/05/21 23:29:53
  • Paul 2012/05/21 23:27:01
    Paul
    +6
    Chivalry isn't dead until they put a bullet in my head.

    im a nice guy
  • Nabael 2012/05/21 23:07:45
    Nabael
    +1
    Even if it was the case that women are more attracted to jerks, those of us who aren't jerks have a tendency to keep the good ones longer ;)
  • joe 2012/05/21 22:52:54
    joe
    +1
    Many women reward A behaviour and expect B results. There is really no incentive for self centered immature men to not act like jerks as long as women continue to confuse the power to with hold and hurt with the real power the men in the best relationships possess and project.
  • lilliannanicole 2012/05/21 22:24:55
    lilliannanicole
    i have never liked a "bad boy" so yeah cool
  • kim 2012/05/21 21:54:52
    kim
    Seems to be the theme in my life...but in all fairness at first and act sweet ...then the true colors come out
  • Bob S 2012/05/21 21:24:41
    Bob S
    Could be..Look who Michelle got.
  • Flea 2012/05/21 21:22:05
    Flea
    I think it's more an excitement thing than anything else. Who wants to be in a boring, healthy relationship these days? If you are involved with a jerk, you are bound for a relationship filled with ups and downs and dysfunction and chaos; and there's plenty of drama kings and queens out there to make the world go 'round....
  • ZERO 2012/05/21 20:49:34
    ZERO
    +1
    It's true that nice guys 'finish last', that's just sexual courtesy.
  • lorenab. 2012/05/21 20:47:09
    lorenab.
    i dont know why... but we, well at least i, LOVE bad boys, or jerks! i mean, just like guys, i like a challenge! I guess its the flirting and trying to get him to be with you... i dont know... i mean i dont put up with any guys crap, but i dont know.... maybe not so much the jerks, but the bad boys!!:D haha
    Bad boy + tatted up= sexy! just sayin!:D haha
  • Mrs Reckless 2012/05/21 20:44:35
    Mrs Reckless
    Yeah its true, I am deffinately attracted to that kind of attitude, the one that's like 'IDGAF what you think', I find it kind of sexy:/ which never works out
  • pops 2012/05/21 20:39:11
    pops
    I believe every man.especially married men have been called a jerk a time or two.
  • PoliticalSanity 2012/05/21 20:38:10
    PoliticalSanity
    I think women do have a sense of testosterone level, which can be reflected in behavior and body language, not to mention development. How many times have we seen them pick the biggest available stud in the herd? The more attractive they are the better their chances or the higher their aim.
  • ConfidentialDede 2012/05/21 20:15:38
    ConfidentialDede
    I believe so , because its shows the man in then , Im not saying that I have dated a jerk ' but in general most of my friends do. . . crazy
  • CREW grand 2012/05/21 20:07:12
    CREW grand
    Proof that not only are women attracted to jerks, but many are also in denial about it.

    Don
  • Vision of Verve 2012/05/21 19:53:53
  • Sherlock Dog BL - a Gazillion 2012/05/21 19:36:57
  • S and S 2012/05/21 19:02:28
  • Krysta 2012/05/21 18:55:03
    Krysta
    +1
    Correction- idiotic women with low self esteem and no self worth are attracted to jerks.
  • GLaDOS Krysta 2012/05/22 01:50:41
    GLaDOS
    +1
    Whereas strong, intelligent women are attracted to doormats?
  • Krysta GLaDOS 2012/05/29 17:33:07

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