Opposites Attract, but Is It Better to Date Someone Like You?

Living 2012/06/18 20:38:29
Related Topics: Opposites, Attract, dating, Love
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It's true that opposites attract. But do they last? Howaboutwe.com writer Nikki Metzgar is used to dating guys just like her, but now she's wondering if she should branch out and date her opposite.

"I usually look for the guys who are exactly like me," she writes. "The other day at work, a guy asked me for my phone number. He is around my age and definitely cute. I don’t think I should be dating coworkers, but that is another issue.

"I skipped over that problem entirely and moved straight to whether we would get along, because so far we have absolutely nothing in common, based on about 20 minutes of conversation. The first thing he said to me was that he loves to go to metal concerts at this bar in a suburb about 40 minutes away from downtown.

"He can listen to metal all he likes, I don’t think less of him or really care at all. But I don’t want to listen to metal. Then he said he loves baseball, which is a great American pastime, of course. It’s just one I don’t care about. Somehow we ended up talking favorite ice cream flavors. Mine is chocolate. His is butter pecan. I’ve never even tasted butter pecan!"

Do you think this couple has a shot at love? Or is better to date someone more or less like you?
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Top Opinion

  • selena costa 2012/06/19 00:00:23
    selena costa
    I dont need someone like me. i need someone different than me because im not a talkative person. i want someone who talks alote to make me talk. if that makes sense?

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  • AmyLMcc... Lydecho... 2012/06/19 00:02:26
    Oh yeah? Before I got engaged to chuck I had the same probitable crazy list of dating demands
  • Barefoot Peace and Love∞ijm... 2012/06/18 23:52:26
    Barefoot Peace and Love∞ijm♥☮♥∞
    yeah they do!
  • Dan Barefoo... 2012/06/19 00:53:06
    What? Do you have a quiz made up already? Do they have to pass?
  • Alexandria Phoenix 2012/06/18 23:52:03
    Alexandria Phoenix
    Personally, I would never rule out a shot at love,and if you're going off of 20 minutes of conversation, there's abut 20 million more things to learn about this guy. Give it a shot. if you don't like him after one date, then you don't like him. If you're going for someone that likes exactly the same things as you, you minus well just date yourself.
  • Boris Badinov 2012/06/18 23:51:17
    Boris Badinov
    Someone you don't have to negotiate with constatnly.
  • Anna 2012/06/18 23:14:57
    If I dated my double WW3 would start. I wouldn't want to date my total opposite, and we'd need to agree on some things, but differences are what make life interesting. If I never wanted another point of view I'd talk to a mirror all day.
  • amy 2012/06/18 23:08:22
  • jackie 2012/06/18 22:47:33
    Of course! I would like to meet a nice guy who I can talk to. Basically like me, we can trust each other and respect each other. I want him to be receptive to things like I am. I attracted opposites. I am ugly unpopular and have no people skills. They were popular, very good looking, have tons of people skills some were even athletic (im a fatty lol). I turned them down because I thought that they wouldnt understand me. which is true because they were the opposite and ended up going with girls who are the same as them. I want someone who have a lot of my core values. not to be exactly the same as me but close.
  • Willski 2012/06/18 22:46:38
  • spencerc143 2012/06/18 22:43:10
    Yeah because then you can relate to your mate. Hahaha
  • L1 2012/06/18 22:40:37
    By someone like you, I mean someone that shares your goals and beliefs. The superficial stuff like taste in music and food isn't that important.

    People that have opposite beliefs and goals won't last, and chances are what attracted them to each other at first is what will drive them apart.
  • Aingean 2012/06/18 22:38:57
    I think I would get bored dating someone very similar to me. Not to mention if we had the same type of temperament we would be at each others throats a lot.
  • geneticmistake 2012/06/18 22:37:42
    ...or yes. No idea. I've never dated anyone like me. For that matter I don't think I've met another like me. Emily Deschanel's character Constance Brennan on the tv show Bones has a very similar personality to mine. I'm not a genius though.
  • alaws2005 2012/06/18 22:21:17
    yes and no, it depends on what it is
  • Александр Коузов 2012/06/18 21:39:06
    Александр Коузов
    Id imagine that the total opposite of me would make the relationship boring and unstable
  • opa62 2012/06/18 21:27:29
    Not really. Tried it both ways, mixed results.
  • 098765 2012/06/18 21:23:04 (edited)
    "opposites attract" is a myth people use to justify their poor mating options

    all of the problems that arise between my mate and me are due to differences, and all our joys to shared similarities
  • Linkums 2012/06/18 21:17:02
    I could've sworn a year or two back SH posted a story about a study that showed that opposites DON'T attract when it comes to romantic relationships.
  • sherie 2012/06/18 20:55:02
    Not necessarily. I think opposites can do very well together if their core believes and values are the same.opposite temperaments kind of balance each other.My husband of 37 years has a totally different temperament.
  • itscourtney8 2012/06/18 20:54:42
    With opposites, it's great if you're open to explore each other world, if you close your mind, then No. With similar taste, it's easier to connect and you get joyful and ecstatic from sharing what you both like/love doing in each others company. So in the writers case, she should stay in her lane.
  • tblackb 2012/06/18 20:53:00
    i think you need to be demographically similar as well as have to have some basic ideological similarities in order to make a long-term relationship endure.
  • Katelin Rose Harris 2012/06/18 20:46:25
    Katelin Rose Harris
    its good to agree on certain things but opposites do attracts
  • Lerro DeHazel 2012/06/18 20:45:35
    Lerro DeHazel
    There are NOT enough Choices of Answers for this Question . . . .

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