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Is Chivalry Really Dead?

The Big Question 2012/08/08 01:01:58
Related Topics: chivalry, Dead
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  • Tom R 007 2012/08/08 01:04:54
    No
    Tom R 007
    +12
    Not sure. If it is, women only have themselves to blame. The jerks get the girls and the gentlemen get ignored, so it's little wonder that many men choose to be jerks. I've lost count of how many times I've held a door open for a woman and she's turned and scowled at me like I just pissed on her kitten.

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  • Tom R 007 2012/08/08 01:04:54
    No
    Tom R 007
    +12
    Not sure. If it is, women only have themselves to blame. The jerks get the girls and the gentlemen get ignored, so it's little wonder that many men choose to be jerks. I've lost count of how many times I've held a door open for a woman and she's turned and scowled at me like I just pissed on her kitten.
  • sundance Tom R 007 2012/08/08 04:19:47
    sundance
    +3
    Thats when you just have a little fun, smile, and look at her like your practicing for a real lady...Just a thought...
  • Tom R 007 sundance 2012/08/08 04:22:13
    Tom R 007
    +3
    I like that. Next time :-)
  • sundance Tom R 007 2012/08/08 07:22:19
    sundance
    +2
    Oh by the way. The "pissed on her kitten" comment, nearly caused me to spit soda all over my monitor....Thanks for the visual...Just a thought...
  • Tom R 007 sundance 2012/08/08 07:25:33
    Tom R 007
    +2
    Haha. Glad you like it. It's a line from a play that I wrote :-)
  • sundance Tom R 007 2012/08/08 12:21:50
    sundance
    +1
    Happen to have handy, the minutes of that play? I would love to read it. I am always up for a good works...Just a thought....
  • Tom R 007 sundance 2012/08/08 23:41:09
    Tom R 007
    +1
    It needs to be retyped and published. I performed it last year and I'm hoping to perform it again next year, but unless you live in New Zealand you won't be able to watch it, haha :-)
  • sundance Tom R 007 2012/08/09 00:59:26
    sundance
    +1
    Sounds like it would be worth the trip. I would love ( beyond words) to travel to New Zealand. An amazing place, to say the least. Anyway, if it could reach me, I would love to read it. I am always struck by those with wit...Just a thought...
  • Tom R 007 sundance 2012/08/09 01:43:36
    Tom R 007
    +1
    Well I'll see what I can do! It definitely needs a retype though.
  • sundance Tom R 007 2012/08/09 04:00:38 (edited)
    sundance
    +2
    I would be very appreciative...Peace
  • MlssCue... sundance 2012/08/09 06:41:34
    MlssCue =Go Blue=
    He (almost made me do that one time) with a spoonful of milk, he's hilarious!
  • sundance MlssCue... 2012/08/09 08:17:39
    sundance
    +1
    Has his moments doesn't he?.....
  • MlssCue... sundance 2012/08/09 08:24:40
    MlssCue =Go Blue=
    He has MANY of them! :-D
  • Melizmatic Tom R 007 2012/08/08 05:33:13
    Melizmatic
    +6
    >>>"If it is, women only have themselves to blame. "<<<

    ALL women, huh?

    >>>"The jerks get the girls and the gentlemen get ignored.."<<<

    That's what ALWAYS happens, 100% of the time, in every situation?

    Okay glaringly obvious over-generalizations aside, let me clue you in, sugar; that's the difference between girls real women.

    "Nice girls" like "bad boys" but a grown-ass woman with a healthy sense of positive self-esteem appreciates a real man who treats her well, and she respects him as he respects her.

    grown-ass woman healthy positive self-esteem appreciates real treats respects respects


    As for the door thing; in my opinion, its whoever gets to damn thing first.

    ;-)

    If I get there first, I hold the door for whomever is behind me; regardless to gender.

    If they scowl, that's their problem; I just smile even wider.

    If someone gets to the door before me and holds it, I say 'thanks.'
  • Tom R 007 Melizmatic 2012/08/08 06:09:57
    Tom R 007
    +2
    There was really no need for all of that. I never said ALL women. I get your point, but you're making it to the wrong person. The phrase "preaching to the choir" comes to mind. Thanks for your comment though :-)
  • Melizmatic Tom R 007 2012/08/08 15:43:29
    Melizmatic
    +1
    "No need?"

    It's just my opinion, in response to a (rather bitter-sounding) comment that you made.

    If you're "the choir", then perhaps you might want to work on your 'harmony.'


    side eye
  • Tom R 007 Melizmatic 2012/08/08 23:35:51
    Tom R 007
    I'm sure you wouldn't have minded if I had said "women are more in touch with their emotions than men". That's not necessarily true in EVERY case. For example, I'm a lot more in touch with my emotions than my sister, but people would've known what I meant by that statement and wouldn't have got all bent out of shape the way that you did by what I said. SOME women seem to pick and choose which "generalisations" to make a big deal about. Most people who read my comment were intelligent enough to know what I meant, and I'm pretty sure that you are too, so maybe you're just the type of person who likes to argue.
  • Melizmatic Tom R 007 2012/08/09 00:10:06
    Melizmatic
    Yeah, actually I would have still had something to say, because its still an unfair over-generalization.

    And no one is 'bent out of shape'; My shape is still awesome:

    hour glass figure shadow
  • Tom R 007 Melizmatic 2012/08/09 00:13:11
    Tom R 007
    I can tell that you're the kind of person who has something to say about a lot of things. Kind of like the answer to a question no one asked. All I can say is that at least most people knew what my point was. I don't really care whether you did or not.
  • sundance Tom R 007 2012/08/09 01:02:02
    sundance
    You have heard of beating a dead horse? Put down the club, and let them rant...Just a thought...
  • Melizmatic sundance 2012/08/09 01:19:58 (edited)
    Melizmatic
    Lovely advice.

    ;-)
  • Tom R 007 sundance 2012/08/09 01:44:39
    Tom R 007
    This is one horse who needs a trip to the glue factory!
  • Melizmatic Tom R 007 2012/08/09 01:20:54
    Melizmatic
    Groovy.

    It seems like you lost that wonderful sense of humor you had when you first tried to troll me a little while back.

    'Tis a pity.
  • Tom R 007 Melizmatic 2012/08/09 01:41:17
    Tom R 007
    I never troll, so I have no idea to what you are referring. My sense of humour is fine. The problem is when people (such as yourself) create arguments out of nothing. Sometimes one can get sucked into that person's meaningless babble, as I've obviously done this time round. I guess you also like to have the last word as well?
  • Melizmatic Tom R 007 2012/08/09 01:48:16
    Melizmatic
    If you say so.

    And nope, I dont "need" the last word, so here's your chance; go for it.

    I'll even have 'keyboard cat' play you off...


  • MlssCue... Tom R 007 2012/08/08 06:08:44
    MlssCue =Go Blue=
    +5
    If a guy opens a door for me or even holds it open if he went in ahead of me, I always say thank you! I'll hold the door for any woman or man, especially the elderly and I can not tell you how many of both sexes say nothing, and it makes me want to trip their rude ass as they walk by!
  • Tom R 007 MlssCue... 2012/08/08 06:11:19
    Tom R 007
    +1
    I concur.
  • MlssCue... Tom R 007 2012/08/08 06:16:10
    MlssCue =Go Blue=
    +1
    I wasn't saying you were wrong, sorry....
  • Tom R 007 MlssCue... 2012/08/08 06:24:48
    Tom R 007
    +1
    I know :-)
  • saturda... MlssCue... 2012/08/08 16:44:04
    saturdayschild
    +1
    You've said it! Too many people are too into themselves who think the world owes them what they want.
  • MlssCue... saturda... 2012/08/09 06:28:13
    MlssCue =Go Blue=
    +1
    Yep & they are going to have one rude awakening some day. The world owes us nothing! Be grateful for what you do have!
  • saturda... MlssCue... 2012/08/11 13:10:31
  • Rave Tom R 007 2012/08/08 09:09:32
    Rave
    +4
    Actually from my experience true gentlemen rarely get ignored. But I've not met that many in my life, but the ones I have are always being noticed by women. You know, the ones that take care of their hygiene, are respectful towards everyone no matter if they're pretty or not, treat everyone fairly and kindly, show well adjusted manners, act maturely and understandingly and don't expect anything in return.

    It's just that, well many men believe that they are gentlemen when in reality they aren't. They occasionally open a door for a pretty woman and then expect her to jump their bones practically, or they are nice to some women and get insulted and moody when they women don't give them the attention they feel they deserve. They call themselves 'nice guys' when in reality their behavior is rather self-centered and often desperate. They also don't say what they want, often just acting like a friend and then out of nowhere throwing love confessions out there.

    Now I'm not saying all men who call themselves gentlemen are like that, and there are some very true gentlemen out there. But those 'fake gentlemen' really give a bad reputation for the rest.
  • Tom R 007 Rave 2012/08/08 09:19:02
    Tom R 007
    +2
    I certainly wasn't implying that all jerks get women and no gentlemen do. I think that anyone that's even remotely perceptive to what's around them knows that there is a certain attraction that women have to a "bad boy". Does that mean that ALL women are attracted to these jerks? Of course not. And there are women who would love to date a gentleman and don't have time for the jerks of this world. But let's not be naive about this. Jerks often have women falling over themselves to get to them, while the guys who actually respect women often get passed by. Notice I said "often" not "always".
  • Rave Tom R 007 2012/08/08 10:25:07
    Rave
    +4
    Of course many women have a thing for the "bad boy" type but it's usually just a certain look and attitude they mean by it, in movies/books usually the bad boy is a gentleman anyhow, it's just this sort of fantasy some women have.

    Also it's not as if anyone actually likes a jerk, it's not the jerkiness that women are falling for, it's the other aspects that come along with it. Usually only men who can get 'away with it' are jerks, as in they already have very good looks or are highly talented in some aspect and it's more the superficial nature that draws women to them. The same way very attractive women can get away with treating men poorly simply because they'll still have men lining up ready to date them because of their looks.

    Also jerks are very often more confident than nicer guys, because jerks don't generally care much about rejection, they are more likely to be very forward with what they want and simply get more girls because they go for it, while the nicer guys might wait around for a woman they really like and then be too nervous of going through with it. So by default, the jerk goes to more women, he gets more women. And if he gets rejected, he simply moves on to someone else.

    Also there's the whole challenge aspect too, jerks are self-centered, and some women want to...

    Of course many women have a thing for the "bad boy" type but it's usually just a certain look and attitude they mean by it, in movies/books usually the bad boy is a gentleman anyhow, it's just this sort of fantasy some women have.

    Also it's not as if anyone actually likes a jerk, it's not the jerkiness that women are falling for, it's the other aspects that come along with it. Usually only men who can get 'away with it' are jerks, as in they already have very good looks or are highly talented in some aspect and it's more the superficial nature that draws women to them. The same way very attractive women can get away with treating men poorly simply because they'll still have men lining up ready to date them because of their looks.

    Also jerks are very often more confident than nicer guys, because jerks don't generally care much about rejection, they are more likely to be very forward with what they want and simply get more girls because they go for it, while the nicer guys might wait around for a woman they really like and then be too nervous of going through with it. So by default, the jerk goes to more women, he gets more women. And if he gets rejected, he simply moves on to someone else.

    Also there's the whole challenge aspect too, jerks are self-centered, and some women want to see if they can change that.

    But no one actually enjoys being mistreated or abused in any way. The relationships that jerks have never really last, the gentleman usually gets the real, healthy relationship which actually means something. It's worth more than whatever the jerk may get.
    (more)
  • Tom R 007 Rave 2012/08/08 10:30:36
    Tom R 007
    +3
    Someone who has true confidence doesn't need to act like a jerk. I'm confident and I don't parade myself around like a douche. I don't need to. THAT's what true confidence is.
  • Rave Tom R 007 2012/08/08 17:34:13
    Rave
    +2
    Very true.

    But I mean, jerks often approach women very directly, and if they do it often enough, some women will go for it. Jerks from my experience don't really care if they're rejected, or at least act like they don't.
  • Tom R 007 Rave 2012/08/08 23:38:05
    Tom R 007
    +1
    I'll never understand how a woman can't tell the difference between a guy who's confident and a guy who's a jerk. But then again, I'm a guy, so perhaps I'm not meant to understand :-)
  • saturda... Tom R 007 2012/08/08 16:41:42
    saturdayschild
    +1
    Maybe you've learned a lesson. Women deserve no more respect than men. Why shouldn't a woman who approaches a door first hold it open for the man behind her?
  • LEFT IS... Tom R 007 2012/08/25 14:27:09
    LEFT IS NOT RIGHT
    +1
    I agree Tom.

    I appreciate when a man holds a door, etc., and I always acknowledge it to that person.

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