How Well do you know your Bible Can you Spot the Fake Bible Quotes over the Real ones?
☥☽✪☾DAW ☽✪☾
2012/06/13 21:30:41
Real or Fake bible quote Example can you spot the fake bible quote vs the Real one?
Genesis 22:2,10
And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and ... offer him there for a burnt offering.... And Abraham stretched forth his hand, and took the knife to slay his son.
Luke 12:25 Start worrying and you can add many days to your life, because ultimately you're the one who needs to be in control, right?
and the Lord Sayth When there would be Trouble Hark! Arrive to the Box
Whovians 23:12
I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man. She must be quiet." (1 Timothy 2:12)
1. Proverbs 11:28
"Those who trust in their riches will flourish and be fulfilled, life will be great, but the righteous will flounder and flop.
Who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD?" -- Exodus 4:11
Matthew 10:34
“Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword
A Wind of Fire shall blow Glitter into the Eyes of homosexuals and You shall know my name is the LORD Hebrews 14:12
Happy those who seize your children and smash them against a rock." (Psalm 137:9
too many men, too many people, making too many problems and not enough love to go around cant you see this land of confusion Genesis 19:86
Real or Fake?
they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well."
Mark 16:18
Psalms 38:5 My wounds stink and are corrupt because of my foolishness.
She lusted after lovers with genitals as large as a donkey’s and emissions like those of a horse. —Ezekiel 23:20
Shit.” Jesus ducked behind a large chunk of the collapsed Temple. “It’s all over, Jesus!” Caiaphas shouted from behind a flamed out VW Bug (the newer model). “I know you’re out of ammo. Just come out and talk to us. It’s OK.” Jesus wasn’t buying it. Nothing was ‘OK’. He lit up another Benson & Hedges.
Morrelleus 34:9-17
Do to others as you would have them do to you. —Luke 6:31
This is the sum of duty: do naught unto others which would cause you pain if done to you. —Mahabharata 5:1517
Ezekiel 23:19-20
Yet she increased her prostitution, remembering the days of her youth when she engaged in prostitution in the land of Egypt. She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.
Boseefus 27:9-11
And Jesus spake upon the people that hath gathered, “Why doeth thou hate the mime so? Doest thou not seeth that he is not intending to doest thou any harm and merely trying lighten our hearts through whimsy during this trying time? Blessed are the mimes, for theirs is also the kingdom of heaven.”
At this point the crowd demanded Pilate give them the man named Barabbas.
It is better to live alone in the desert than with a crabby, complaining wife.
Proverbs 21:19
He said to Jacob, "Let me eat some of that red stuff, because I'm exhausted."
Genesis 25:30
Jonas 18:23-24
And thus Jesus said upon them, “Thouest remember the man named Hammurabi… thou shall doest as he hath said.” Jesus then proceeded to porketh the fine babes that hath gathered around him.
Boseefus 27:9-11
And Jesus spake upon the people that hath gathered, “Why doeth thou hate the mime so? Doest thou not seeth that he is not intending to doest thou any harm and merely trying lighten our hearts through whimsy during this trying time? Blessed are the mimes, for theirs is also the kingdom of heaven.” At this
Deuteronomy 23:1
No one whose testicles are crushed or whose male organ is cut off shall enter the assembly of the Lord.
“One of you jerks is going to rat on me,” said Jesus. Commotion sprang out between those gathered.
“No, man! Jesus, you be trippin’,” Peter responded. “You best be stopping that wine sipping if you know what’s good for you.”
“I’m serious,” Jesus said. He continued, “Who wants this piece of bread I just dipped in something? Judas?”
“Fuuuuuck,” said Judas, who then ate the bread, took the money box, and ran from the table into the darkness.
“Can you believe this guy?” Jesus asked.” Kings 12:22.5
2 Kings 2:23-24
Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead!” So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the LORD. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.
Clanceus 12:3-34
Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel…” (1 Pet 3:3)
Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven and you are on earth. Therefore let your words be few. 2 Kings 2:23-24
Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to an alien living in any of your towns and he may eat it, or you may sell it to a foreigner...
Deuteronomy 14:21
1 Samuel 18:25-27 ESV
Then Saul said, “Thus shall you say to David, ‘The king desires no bride-price except a hundred foreskins of the Philistines, that he may be avenged of the king’s enemies.’” Now Saul thought to make David fall by the hand of the Philistines. And when his servants told David these words, it pleased David well to be the king’s son-in-law. Before the time had expired, David arose and went, along with his men, and killed two hundred of the Philistines. And David brought their foreskins, which were given in full number to the king, that he might become the king’s son-in-law. And Saul gave him his daughter Michal for a wife.
How do you present a gift like that? Do you tie a bow on the box?
Exodus 4:24-25 NASB
Now it came about at the lodging place on the way that the LORD met him and sought to put him to death. Then Zipporah took a flint and cut off her son’s foreskin and threw it at Moses’ feet, and she said, “You are indeed a bridegroom of blood to me.
Ben Franklin became enraged.
Jesus had broken through the outlying defenses and was advancing towards the Eiffel Tower. He had one goal in mind: Retrieve the sword Excalibur and return it to it’s rightful owner, but more importantly his high-paying client, Don Mattingly.
Franklin called to his henchmen, “Find me my hunting spear, damnit!”
Jesus, over the course of 10 years, had become one of the most sought after mercenaries operating in the West. Among his many exploits was the famous Tajahiri Heist and the even more famous Tennis Hall Judo Spree, as the press had dubbed it.
Franklin and his men moved up to the South Gate, where Jesus was focusing his attacks. Left with only a third of his men after a failed mutiny, the small force was extremely loyal to the cause and would lose their lives before they would surrender. They would take the fight to Jesus, not exactly what he would be expecting.
The method Jesus employed in these types of situations was a blitzkrieg style of attack: move in fast and decimate the enemy before they could bring up sufficient defenses. Jesus’ plan did not take into consideration an advancing enemy.
Jesus saw the torches coming over the hill. Although surprised, he began re-forging the plan and kept moving ahead. But then he heard a sound that did surprise him: the song “Dance Magic” from the movie Labyrinth.
Mark 14:51-52
A young man was following Him, wearing nothing but a linen sheet over his naked body; and they seized him. But he pulled free of the linen sheet and escaped naked.
And the Lord Sayth do not weep for the Dead for no one will weep for you when I ravage all who love you now Obey me or Die I am The LORD! Psalm 14:6
Jesus the Lord bid His apostles to form a circle around Him. And there He did speak: 32. 'And now let those of true faith extendeth thine right leg to the center of our Circle of Spiritual Truth. Withdraw thine right leg, then return thine right leg to the Circle, and then shaketh it to and fro. Ye must do the Hokey Pokey, then turn thyself around. 33. Do this is remembrance of Me, my apostles, for this, I say to thee, is truly what it is all about.
Luke 6:13
“Serve two masters. Give it all you got to love them both, be fully devoted to both the best you can. Serve both God and money (don’t worry they won’t conflict with each other) and you will find fulfillment.”
Matthew 6:19
"Store up for yourselves treasures here on earth, get as much as you can cause you only have a short while. And whatever you accumulate god will protect it all for you."
Genesis 35:5
The terror of God was upon the cities that were round about them.
So the man took his concubine and sent her outside to them, and they raped her and abused her throughout the night, and at dawn they let her go. At daybreak the woman went back to the house where her master was staying, fell down at the door and lay there until daylight. When her master got up in the morning and opened the door of the house and stepped out to continue on his way, there lay his concubine, fallen in the doorway of the house, with her hands on the threshold. He said to her, ‘Get up; let’s go.’ But there was no answer. Then the man put her on his donkey and set out for home.” (Judges 19:25-28
Whoever charges interest on a loan must die.
Hath given forth upon usury, and hath taken increase: shall he then live? he shall not live: he hath done all these abominations; he shall surely die; his blood shall be upon him. -- Ezekiel 18:13
Luke 12:15
"Then he said to them, “Watch out! Learn to develop the love of Benjamin’s, covet the greens, buy lots of stocks, make sure you have a huge retirement so I don’t have to take care of you; life consists in an abundance of possessions.”
Lot was a just and righteous man.
And delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked: (For that righteous man dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds;) 2 Peter 2:7-8
He was the only man that God saved from the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah.
...the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city. Genesis 19:15
He got drunk and impregnated his virgin daughters.
Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. And they made their father drink wine that night: and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. Behold, I lay yesternight with my father: let us make him drink wine this night also; and go thou in, and lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. And they made their father drink wine that night also: and the younger arose, and lay with him; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father. Genesis 19:32-36
Hebrews 14:5
"Love money and never be content with what you have, always desire more stuff. The more the better. Look at all I got, now go out and get it yourself."
And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat." -- Leviticus 26:29
Luke 6:13
“Serve two masters. Give it all you got to love them both, be fully devoted to both the best you can. Serve both God and money (don’t worry they won’t conflict with each other) and you will find fulfillment.”
Matthew 6:19
"Store up for yourselves treasures here on earth, get as much as you can cause you only have a short while. And whatever you accumulate god will protect it all for you."
Genesis 35:5
The terror of God was upon the cities that were round about them.
So the man took his concubine and sent her outside to them, and they raped her and abused her throughout the night, and at dawn they let her go. At daybreak the woman went back to the house where her master was staying, fell down at the door and lay there until daylight. When her master got up in the morning and opened the door of the house and stepped out to continue on his way, there lay his concubine, fallen in the doorway of the house, with her hands on the threshold. He said to her, ‘Get up; let’s go.’ But there was no answer. Then the man put her on his donkey and set out for home.” (Judges 19:25-28
Whoever charges interest on a loan must die.
Hath given forth upon usury, and hath taken increase: shall he then live? he shall not live: he hath done all these abominations; he shall surely die; his blood shall be upon him. -- Ezekiel 18:13
Deuteronomy 25:11-13
If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from his assailant, and she reaches out and seizes him by his private parts, you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity
Luke 12:15
"Then he said to them, “Watch out! Learn to develop the love of Benjamin’s, covet the greens, buy lots of stocks, make sure you have a huge retirement so I don’t have to take care of you; life consists in an abundance of possessions.”
Lot was a just and righteous man.
And delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked: (For that righteous man dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds;) 2 Peter 2:7-8
He was the only man that God saved from the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah.
...the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city. Genesis 19:15
He got drunk and impregnated his virgin daughters.
Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. And they made their father drink wine that night: and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. Behold, I lay yesternight with my father: let us make him drink wine this night also; and go thou in, and lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. And they made their father drink wine that night also: and the younger arose, and lay with him; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father. Genesis 19:32-36
Hebrews 14:5
"Love money and never be content with what you have, always desire more stuff. The more the better. Look at all I got, now go out and get it yourself."
And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat." -- Leviticus 26:29
Top Opinion
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misterz 2012/06/14 17:05:28
Technically, none of them are the word of God and all are the word of men, but they are in the bible since man wrote it.
Blessings to all and,
May all be well with you ^_^
If you can't or won't, then your argument has no value and can be ignored.
I never cared to justify anything to u, that's my point.
An i am not the one who started this "argument".
But maybe i should end it.
However, if you aren't prepared to follow through on you comments here, expect a rough ride from some of the others.
By the way, I'm also dyslectic (people who suffer from dyslexia are dyslectic, not dyslexic), but 51 years of practice and the built in spell-checker on the browser makes this no handicap these days.
An it does come from "non-humans" as u put it.
But u never asked me if it did or didn't.
An to explain where it did come from would take to long on here for my liking. So i have no interest in taking time to do so.
Now as for those that were fake. I got a good laugh out of them
Have you ever heard of a Crypto-Christian? These little groups publish their own bibles with entire new chapters which they say were revealed to them by God.