Have you heard the story of Ceiling cat? and the lol bible?
☥☽✪☾DAW ☽✪☾
2011/04/26 19:24:21
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In the Begining there was Ceiling Cat But he was Bored so he made the universe in his meowness...
And all was good in the world
lol cats called to ceiling cat for food and so ceiling cat sent them food
cheeseburgers
Ceiling cat noticed that the world was empty and needed something
so ceiling cat created man
and gave man knowledge
and told man to go forth and feed the kitties
but man defied lol cats everywhere so they prayed to ceiling cat
who told man
but then they got hungry again so ceiling cat let man back in after an hour
the lol cats asked ceiling cat what do you command
and so ceiling cat responded
here are my commandments sayth the ceiling cat
and so the word was written
man and lol cat ruled the lol bible
man was lonely so celing cat gave unto him lol dog
and all was good
Ceiling cat took a cat nap and left his angels in charge
after his nap celing cat was told what was happening on earth
and he was mad so he sent his son happy cat
who purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrfected the art of bringing knowledge to everyone how to open the can opener and bring forth love and peace unto all of the world
but sin still happened and ceiling cat forgave all
many began to study ceiling cat
then ceiling cat got a make over and was kinder to man
Happy cat began to teach lol cats and man the word
the word was Cheeseburger
and blessings to all walk of life thanked ceiling cat for the nomz
some still did not believe in Ceiling cat
and so it was good to all except the angry nun cats who took a vow no nook nook
as time went on people and lol cat began to forget ceiling cat
so he would play pranks on the humans
then some nutty lol cats started to make thier own lol bibles changing the word of ceiling cat and asking ceiling cat un speakable things
many signs were made but few understood them for lol cats are color blind
That is the story of Ceiling cat in the begining
if you do not believe this to be true
to be continued
next chapter Basement cat!
Top Opinion
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Radical Ed 2011/04/26 19:27:21
Angry Kittens Sing "Outtathaway" by the Vines
Fun video and pix. Thanx 4D lafs
I can haz atheist quotes frum teh Ceiling Cat hizself all teh tymz.
Srsly, I have had http://www.lolcatbible.com on myz bukmark barr fur liek agez.
Teh Sheepz n teh Goatz
31 "Wen teh Jebus comez in hiz awesumness, n al teh angels wit 'im, he wil sit on 'is couch of teh ceilings awesumness.32 All teh nashuns will be gatherd before him, an he will separate teh peeps wan frum anothr as sheferd separatez teh sheep frum teh goats.33 he will put teh sheep on his rite an teh goats on his left.34 "den teh king will say to dose on his rite, coem, yu hoo haz cheezburgrz from ceiling cat; taek ur kitteh toyz, teh kingdom prepard for yu since teh creashun ov teh urfs.35 4 i wuz hungry an u openz canz and not drai fuds, i wuz thirsty an u gaev me some bowlz, i wuz strangr an yu were liek, "o hai,"36 i had dirty furz an yu gaev me licks, i wuz sick an u rap pillz in ham, i scratch bathrum door an yu openz.37 "den teh riteshus will say, Jebus, when did we c u hungry an gaev yu gushy fud, or thirsty an gaev yu milks?38 when did we see yu strangr an says "o hai," or durty furz and lick yu?"39 when did we know yu sick or stuck in bathroom and help yu?40 "teh king will says, srsly, whatevr yu did teh other kittehs, evn lame kittehs, yu liek did to me.41 "den he will say to dose on his left, leav, you NO CAN HAS CHEEZBURGRZ, into teh Sink of Alwayz Be Wet yu go, an say hai to basement kat and stinky bird...
Teh Sheepz n teh Goatz
31 "Wen teh Jebus comez in hiz awesumness, n al teh angels wit 'im, he wil sit on 'is couch of teh ceilings awesumness.32 All teh nashuns will be gatherd before him, an he will separate teh peeps wan frum anothr as sheferd separatez teh sheep frum teh goats.33 he will put teh sheep on his rite an teh goats on his left.34 "den teh king will say to dose on his rite, coem, yu hoo haz cheezburgrz from ceiling cat; taek ur kitteh toyz, teh kingdom prepard for yu since teh creashun ov teh urfs.35 4 i wuz hungry an u openz canz and not drai fuds, i wuz thirsty an u gaev me some bowlz, i wuz strangr an yu were liek, "o hai,"36 i had dirty furz an yu gaev me licks, i wuz sick an u rap pillz in ham, i scratch bathrum door an yu openz.37 "den teh riteshus will say, Jebus, when did we c u hungry an gaev yu gushy fud, or thirsty an gaev yu milks?38 when did we see yu strangr an says "o hai," or durty furz and lick yu?"39 when did we know yu sick or stuck in bathroom and help yu?40 "teh king will says, srsly, whatevr yu did teh other kittehs, evn lame kittehs, yu liek did to me.41 "den he will say to dose on his left, leav, you NO CAN HAS CHEEZBURGRZ, into teh Sink of Alwayz Be Wet yu go, an say hai to basement kat and stinky birdcatz.42 fer I has hunger an yu gave me dry fuds, i wuz thirsty an yu says "only got dry bowls,""43 i wuz strangr an yu did not say hai, i has durty furz and you wer liek "go lick selfs," i wuz sick an stuck in bathrum and you wer liek, "whatever." Lamerz.44 "they also will say, lord, when did we see yu hunger or thirsts or strangr or durty furz or sicks, an says, "NO CAN HAS help yu?"45 "he will says, srsly, whatevr yu did not do for even lamer kittehs, yu did not do fur me.46 "den they will go be wet with basement cat, but teh riteshus will be dry wif ceiling cat."
1 Cawrinthyans
20 Gro up alredi.
21 Ceiling Cat sez
"I wil talk to u thru peepl talkin all weerd an thru forinerz, but itz not laik eniwunz goin to lissn."
22 Tungz ar to impress n00bz, not to teech beleevrz ennithin. But professi is for beleevrz, not n00bz.
23 If sum n00b comz to church an hearz evribodi speakin in anothr tung, he wil be liek "Srsly WTF? dey iz nutz. LOL."
24 But if a n00b comz in when sumwun is tellin teh fyoochr, he will be liek "Whoa!
25 Ceiling Cat r00lz!"
26 Teh whoal point of gettin togethr in church iz to do teh church sum good.
27 If sumbodi wantz to speek in anothr tung, doant do it all at teh saem tiem. O an sumwun shud explain what it meenz.
28 If dere iz no interpretr, teh peepl who want to speek in anothr tung shud just STFU.
29 A cuppl of peepl shud tell teh fyoochr, and teh rest shud think about what dey sedded.
30 If sumbodi whoz sittin down has a vizion, whoevrz talkin should STFU.
31 Be good an taek turnz.
32 U can behaev when ur tellin teh fyoochr,
33 bcz Ceiling Cat isnt disorderli. He is peacefl.
Saem az in all teh churchz,
34 ladiez should STFU. Dat is teh law.
35 If dey haz kweschnz dey can ask deir huzbndz at hoem LOL. Ladiez shudnt talk in church, itz bad.
Do you know the story of Basement cat?
You have heard of Ceiling Cat and Basement Cat but have you heard of Stalker cat?
Someone has been playing with Photoshop.
I might talk to ceiling cat tonight.