Both are good, but I think the rewrite is the best of the two. However, I find myself, wanting to know more about the Alley itself. In California, there's a legend which says an Indian woman and a man who loved her, both committed suicide by jumping off a cliff down to a creek, and the name of the place includes the word sucide. But I don't recall the details, which my father once told me. suicide jumping cliff creek includes sucide recall details father told