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Do you think counseling can help save a marriage? I am single....but I was just wondering what you think.

Treasure ♥ijm♥ 2012/03/04 14:15:02
Related Topics: Marriage, Single, Counseling
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  • renee segal 2012/04/15 03:10:22
  • HAlex1972 2012/03/07 23:37:58
  • Sig Sauer P220 2012/03/05 22:52:59
    Sig Sauer P220
    +1
    Did not work in my two previous marriages ...
  • betz 2012/03/05 10:23:44
    betz
    +1
    If couples go into it with an open mind realizing they have both made mistakes it certainly can't hurt.
  • Beat Magnum True Hero 2012/03/05 08:39:26
    Beat Magnum True Hero
    +1
    Communicating about your problems and getting it all out can be helpful at times. A counselor can be a referee when things get heated. People shouldn't give up on a relationship at the first sign of trouble.
  • Just me ∞ijm♥G☮F♀U∞ 2012/03/05 04:06:11
    Just me ∞ijm♥G☮F♀U∞
    +1
    I'm inclined to think it delays the inevitable. However, if both people TRUELY want their relationship to work out, then yes, it can help save a marriage. :o)
  • Gracie - Proud Conservative 2012/03/05 02:25:05
    Gracie - Proud Conservative
    +1
    I think it depends on what the problems are. I went to counseling when my first marriage was failing but he was gay so it was nothing but a waste of time. Both parties have to want to get help, not just one.
  • Mrkando 2012/03/05 02:14:51
    Mrkando
    +1
    Counselling can help bring to light the areas in a marriage that need help but it is then up to the couple to make those changes. Often that does not happen once they go back to their normal lives as we all tend to fall back to our old ways.

    If even one of the couple goes into counseling with a bad attitude it can be a total waste of time but if both have come to the conclusion they need help and are willing to make the needed changes then it will work. It takes commitment from both.

    What counseling can do for a couple is to open communication. For couples that are in trouble a major reason is because one or both have given up trying to make their needs known let alone being granted.
  • Inquisitve Kat 2012/03/05 01:29:54
    Inquisitve Kat
    +1
    I think it can help, but only in so far as identifying the issues that the couple needs to work on themselves. If a couple goes to a counsellor expecting the counsellor to 'fix' their marriage, they're likely doomed.
  • AM 2012/03/05 01:23:42
    AM
    +1
    No,An outsider who for profit spends an hour a week with myself and the person who knows me best can possibly save what is (by the time Counseling an option) beyond repair is ridulous...yet we try to bail out that sinking ship
  • ✞Knight of Honor 2012/03/05 01:15:59 (edited)
    ✞Knight of Honor
    +1
    If you are in love and your relationship is in danger, I'd say it's worth a try.
  • Max7 2012/03/04 20:49:07
    Max7
    +1
    I am a firm believer that before getting married, that the couple should seek counseling, and that counseling has save a lot of marriages. Conseling has also caused couples to recognize the fact that marriage isn't for them, they found out in counseling sessions that they had nothing in common, and knew very little about each other. A good counselor is advantageous to a good and successful marriage.
  • Bronar 2012/03/04 19:48:05
    Bronar
    +2
    Didn't help mine.
  • **StarzAbove** 2012/03/04 19:00:13
    **StarzAbove**
    +2
    Sometimes, especially if you get a good counselor who knows what he/she's talking about.
  • Nam Era Vet #1 DNA TLC 2012/03/04 18:30:55
    Nam Era Vet #1 DNA TLC
    +1
    Let me clarify. A GOOD counseler can save a marriage if, and olny if, all parties are willing to work at it, compromise, sacrifice a little and be honest enough to admit their part in the problem.

    But then the lack of those above qualities are why our goverment isn't working now. LOL
  • not u 2012/03/04 16:55:05
    not u
    +1
    Providing each party is responsive to the counseling given...... If either has already decided in there heart that there is no future...... Oh the challenge it can become......
  • ALofRI 2012/03/04 15:42:49
    ALofRI
    +1
    That depends on you. Some people take to guidance by others, some don't. I've tried it, (not for marriage counseling), but I'm one who has to work my own problems out. Luckily, I don't have a big ego and can usually see more than my own side, that works for me. I've been married for 49 total years, never divorced, not religious, don't plan to be either.
  • Dickens 2012/03/04 15:33:21 (edited)
    Dickens
    ...marriage counsellors are almost as fraudulent as people who "cure" gays...
  • Daniel 2012/03/04 15:21:39
    Daniel
    +1
    Not really. I think to many people rush into them without knowing their spouses or thinking they can change them. Love doesn't fade it only grows stronger. What saves a marriage is loving the person you marry. I know lots of women who married second choices.
  • TasselLady 2012/03/04 15:15:20
    TasselLady
    +1
    Sometimes it can, sometimes it can't. It depends on what the problems are. Infidelity is a difficult one to get around. Some people can work around it, but many can't. Once someone cheats on me I'm done and move on. But, the couples need to WANT to work on their marriage before any form of counseling is to be successful. If one does, and the other doesn't, then they're at a stalemate.
    people work cheats couples work marriage form counseling successful stalemate
  • Jiorgia 2012/03/04 15:00:53
    Jiorgia
    +1
    i think if someone has decided that they cant be with someone anymore, then they can't.
    but most couples who do go to counseling are the ones who are still making that decision, so yes i think it can help, if you haven't decided yet.
  • U-Dog 2012/03/04 14:50:44 (edited)
    U-Dog
    +1
    I have seen it help w/couples who are more mature and truly committed to doing what they agree to but I have also seen plenty of cases where the counselors appear more screwed up than the juvenile shallow couples they try to help.
  • rand 2012/03/04 14:40:23
    rand
    +1
    It works for some, but the core of success in mental health is introspection and the change it inspires. It's difficult for one person to do that, much less two in accord. You're better off to know yourself and your values and to be sure those factors make your selection of a compatible mate rather than having your hormones make the decision.
  • Joe61 2012/03/04 14:39:17
    Joe61
    +1
    I don't know, I think perhaps it could help. But, at the end of the day it takes two to tango and ultimately the couple really have to resolve their differences together.
  • Meryl 2012/03/04 14:22:33
    Meryl
    +2
    Sometimes it could work, however, be very wary of the counselors and get references and check their credentials.
  • alanh 2012/03/04 14:17:29
    alanh
    +1
    I think it is hit or miss. It depends on the couple and if they BOTH want things to get better.

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