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Do you ever lose your cool when dealing with your unruly children?

Jerry (Iron Priest)☮ R ☮ P ☮ 201 2008/10/01 19:48:10
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Occasionally I'll blow my stack. Then my wife tells me to get some counseling. Is an occasional explosion of anger(never physical) reason for counseling?
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Top Opinion

  • Candi~playin 2008/10/04 00:57:51
    No
    Candi~playin
    +4
    As long as it is not abusive either verbal or physical. (Or the intent to harm). My kids love to see my head spinning around like the exorcist...they can hardly hold back the grins. I believe in letting it out to keep my own health and sanity. Later we talk and reinforce how much we love each other. It goes along with punishment/rewards logic. U R OK!!!
    Just keep communicating that is what is important. letting health sanity talk reinforce love punishmentrewards logic communicating important

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Opinions

  • Remarkable 2008/12/12 01:13:04
    Yes
    Remarkable
    +1
    As parents I think we all do, or have to catch ourselves before we do. The hardest thing in this world is being a parent.
  • Tpem 2008/10/06 08:50:02
    Yes
    Tpem
    +1
    but not nearly as much as I used to. I have an excercise I do when I feel that coming on. I visualize something bad happening to one of them or Someone else being mean to them or mistreating my child and all that goes away. If they disobey I simply deny them what they want. It does not take them long to do what I ask.
  • Citizen Phil 2008/10/05 02:39:24
    Yes
    Citizen Phil
    +1
    Unfortunately, I said some things to my teenage daughter which I regretted for years. She became even more rebellious. Fortunately, when she started living on her own she realized that she had hurt me as much as I hurt her. We now get along fine, seeing each other several times a week plus phone calls and e-mail.
    Counseling from your pastor might help. Most Phsycho-ologists are too mentally unstable to help anyone else.
  • lady bear 2008/10/04 23:04:58
    Yes
    lady bear
    +2
    All kids will push your buttons. I think if someone says they don't lose their cool on occasion they are lying. Reason for counseling? No. Not unless you are getting violent. If you are physically abusing the child then yes you need help. Yell or scream sometime is called human behavior.
  • MidnightCowboy said "What's... 2008/10/04 02:00:29
    Undecided
    MidnightCowboy said "What's the name? :)
    somethimes
  • Candi~playin 2008/10/04 00:57:51
    No
    Candi~playin
    +4
    As long as it is not abusive either verbal or physical. (Or the intent to harm). My kids love to see my head spinning around like the exorcist...they can hardly hold back the grins. I believe in letting it out to keep my own health and sanity. Later we talk and reinforce how much we love each other. It goes along with punishment/rewards logic. U R OK!!!
    Just keep communicating that is what is important. letting health sanity talk reinforce love punishmentrewards logic communicating important
  • mari_the_rapo 2008/10/03 20:08:19
    No
    mari_the_rapo
    I dont have children. Im only 17. =] which is good that i dont at my age =]
  • Eager Beaver 2008/10/03 09:38:41
    Yes
    Eager Beaver
    +2
    because her mother puts BS ideas in her head so when she comes back to us she starts acting up. i get loud but i need to beat the mothers ass
  • Mollydolly 2008/10/03 05:01:47
    Undecided
    Mollydolly
    +1
    depends. How angry? how often? what is said in this tirade? is there an apology and talk about it later thing? How freaked to the kids get? just a few questions to ponder. and therapy never hurt anyone. Actuall it has helped me emensely
  • Malibulorie 2008/10/03 01:25:45
    No
    Malibulorie
    +2
    But it is wise to count to 10 before you say something that could really hurt your children. I have 3 girls, my oldest two are good kids and never had any problems with them. Then my third came along and she is so hyper and always doing the opposite of what you tell her. I have learned that when you keep your cool you really get through to them,yelling just doesn't work.
  • deleted 404 2008/10/02 22:02:43
    No
    deleted 404
    +2
    You don't need counseling.... Happens to all of us!!
  • Rosalie 2008/10/02 20:34:13 (edited)
    Yes
    Rosalie
    +3
    Yes I do, but mostly everyone knows me and knows I do not tolerate UNRULEY or bad manners or bad mouths !!(smile)
    And no on the counseling . you oviously see where your limit is , so they will learn to.
  • elisa 2008/10/02 19:40:41
    Yes
    elisa
    +2
    Of course who doesn't. This is when I put myself in time out. I find sitting in my art room behind my art table on the floor to be the best time out hidding place. I have six kids almost all teenagers. Two are my mentally ill sisters kids. I am greatful thought that they don't sneek out or do drugs and they aren't sexually active. So I'm pretty lucky.
  • Kelllzerz 2008/10/02 19:17:13
    Yes
    Kelllzerz
    +2
    No, I don't think you need counseling, just control you anger. When you anger starts effecting the children and your relationship with you wife then it's definitely time for counseling. An occasional tantrum over a child is not too bad though. Just don't take it overboard. starts effecting children relationship wife counseling occasional tantrum child overboard
  • Dandy 2008/10/02 18:22:31
    Yes
    Dandy
    +2
    If by lose my cool do you mean I yell a little more or louder than the situation warranted, yes. But my kids are 3 and almost 2 so I am sure I have not lost my cool as much as I will when they get a little older ;)
  • tray 2008/10/02 17:42:54
    Yes
     tray
    +3
    It has been known.... My daughter is autistic and it can be challenging.
    Toward the end of my tether I shout, real loud. It scares her half to death, and I feel terrible about it for days after. I guess it's just my way of dealing with things.
  • SparkleyPie 2008/10/02 17:08:53
    Yes
    SparkleyPie
    +3
    Sometimes. I'm only human.

    They really aren't "unruly" often, though. My kids are pretty good girls.
  • shelley 2008/10/02 16:14:03
    Yes
    shelley
    +3
    oh boy do i ever. i have 5 children to contend with, no; not all mine, but everyday 5 kids no baby sitter no breaks and all you hear is feuding and fussing and tattling and arguing and fighting and wining and disrespectfulness, it gets monotonous, and sometimes when you dont have sufficient support you do break and unfortunately it is bound to happen, eventually losing your temper. but you know all the kids know who is boss, and that im not a pushover so they can see when im gonna lose it and they straighten up most of the time, even if it is just for a little while. but its natural to explode once in a while learn your limitations, and then remember count to a hundred if you have to.
  • dorsey shelley 2008/10/02 16:41:17 (edited)
    dorsey
    +1
    it is very true. we need the nanny's help !!!!
  • elisa dorsey 2008/10/02 19:50:36
    elisa
    +1
    Don't get this wrong I don't hate people from other countries, but I am sick of the nanny they couldn't find an American to help us with our kids. Why the Marry Poppins complex? First we need the nanny to help the stupid American parents. Then we need Simon to tell us if we can sing. Let's not forget Nigel to tell us if we think we can dance. Oh yay what about Bruno to tell stars if they can dance. America's got talent is measured by Peirce and Sharon. I Bet in their countries they don't have Americans telling them if they are good enough. How screwed up are we that we don't trust People in our own country to help us out our judge America's talent. I like Sharon, Pierce, Bruno, and even Simon but I tired of other people telling Americans how to dance, sing, and if we have talent.
  • dorsey elisa 2008/10/02 22:16:10
    dorsey
    thanks for setting me straight we do need an american nanny !!! setting straight american nanny
  • Pet Rock Whisperer 2008/10/02 15:47:55
    No
    Pet Rock Whisperer
    +1
    I am truly blessed. My kids aren't unruly....ever. All who know my son and daughter are always very impressed with how cool they truly are. I love parent teachers conferences, they are always, always a guaranteed ego stroke. lol
  • Jodi 2008/10/02 15:21:04
    Undecided
    Jodi
    I am the unruly child!! Suck on that!
  • Jerry (... Jodi 2008/10/02 16:32:19
    Jerry (Iron Priest)☮ R ☮ P ☮ 201
    +2
    Do you talk to people like that in person?
  • Jodi Jerry (... 2008/10/03 12:31:22
    Jodi
    +1
    yeah but i was just kidding lol...Im actually the good kid in my family, most the time
  • Underfrog 2008/10/02 14:58:05
    Undecided
    Underfrog
    +1
    Maybeeee. Counseling helped my famiy, we all went together. No idea if you need it but you may want to consider it, would not hurt. (and you might win some brownie points with the wife) Who knows?
  • DJ Missie 2008/10/02 14:18:09
    No
    DJ Missie
    +1
    As long as you don't abuse them I don't see why you need counseling, And it's only occasionally. I lose it with my brother, never gets physical and I don't hate him, I don't like him but I love him. I can't wait till he gets older...then he has his little sister to deal with....MWA HA HA HA HA HA!
  • Radtech1996 2008/10/02 13:27:22
    No
    Radtech1996
    +1
    My children are almost grown so no those days are over for me.
  • BlackGold26 2008/10/02 12:35:20
    Undecided
    BlackGold26
    +2
    perpare yourself for what you think will happen and what you think will never happen and then you'll be one step ahead and probably won't need to freak out then not needing counsling... just try to keep cool and remember they are not the reason of what ever else happened to cause the anger used towards them...
  • Kristy~ 2008/10/02 10:38:19
    Yes
    Kristy~
    +2
    i had to babysit my cousin for a day.................and she blew my cool right thru the roof!
  • Toonmaster 2008/10/02 09:48:26
    No
    Toonmaster
    +2
    As long as it's occasional and is non-physical then I can't see any reason to get counseling.

    If it happens A LOT then you might consider getting some counseling for the children.

    -
  • rjcuzican 2008/10/02 07:35:38
    Yes
    rjcuzican
    +2
    WHO EVER HOLDS IT INSIDEAND BITE THERE TONGUE "PLZGO OUTSIDE AND SCREAM AS LOUD AS YOU CAN OR GET A PILLOW AND SCREAM AND TO ANSWER THE QUESTION EVERYONE BLOW A HORN EVERY NOW AND THAN YOU SHOULD SEE MY 3 YEAR plzgo scream loud pillow scream answer blow horn 3 year
  • icymore 2008/10/02 07:16:34
    Undecided
    icymore
    +1
    It depends on how bad your anger is, and how badly you deal with it. Anger is scary for children, even if it's not physical. It can do just as much psychological damage as physical abuse in some cases.
  • ffds 2008/10/02 07:06:14
    Undecided
    ffds
    +1
    its not a reason for counseling... I mean, my kids make mw want to rip my hair out some days... And Ive screamed before... its normal... BUT, I DO try to control it... even though its not that easy!
  • Harley † American 2008/10/02 04:23:14
    No
    Harley  †  American
    +1
    Everyone gets frustrated at times and yell at their kids who are unruly, parents aren't perfect we are human, children don't come with an instruction guide! If you have more than one you learn a lot from the experience of the first!
  • stoney 2008/10/02 04:04:06
    Yes
    stoney
    +1
    its never physical i would never hit my kids i feel bad when i yell at them but i can only take so much but then occasionally i have to leave cause it gets worse especially when your bi polar and depression
  • D.J.-USN. 2008/10/02 03:27:14
    Yes
    D.J.-USN.
    +1
    Well..I used to but not anymore he's grown and is serving overseas..
  • Its Ms.MiMi,b!tch 2008/10/02 03:20:48
    No
    Its Ms.MiMi,b!tch
    +1
    nope,no counseling needed.blowing ur top comes with being a parent.if u didnt blow ur top then u should b concerned,that would mean that ur too passive.in this day in age if it means blowing ur top to keep ur kids in line,go ahead!! blowing ur top is not abuse!id rather do that than to hurt my kids any day.
  • Bitwise Operator 2008/10/02 02:52:37 (edited)
    No
    Bitwise Operator
    +1
    You're human dude. You do have to conquer it though because you lose face in front of the kids. They see you lose control and in their mind you've lost credibility. I occasionally lose it with my four kids.
  • ☆♥Crystal Marie♥☆ 2008/10/02 01:52:05
    No
    ☆♥Crystal Marie♥☆
    +1
    my children are good for the most part. They get a little hyper at times but i never lose it with them.

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