Can incompatible drinking habits doom a relationship?

by L.A. Times Posted 2013/02/06 22:00:00

Related Topics: Valentine, Marriage, Relationship, Divorce, Couples, Alcohol, Drinking, Married, Image, Habits, Images, Norway, 19, Pairs

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	Yes	1,229 votes	89%
	No	150 votes	11%

Here’s something to ponder if and when you and your spouse make your Valentine’s Day toasts this year: when it comes to drinking — as in so many other facets of marriage — compatibility may be key to keeping couples together.

Researchers reviewing data collected from 19,977 married couples in one county in Norway reported that spouses who consume about the same amount of alcohol were less likely to divorce than pairs where one partner is a heavy drinker and the other is not — especially when the wife is the one doing the drinking.

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juicebox07 2013/02/07 04:23:15 (edited)

Yes

+3
My parents are proof that it does. They were both alcoholics, but when I was 3 years old my mom got sober. She couldn't handle my dad's drinking anymore. I can definitely understand that since she wanted to maintain her sobriety. He still drinks every day and refuses to quit, but my mom has been sober for 21 years now.
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Larry M 2013/02/11 22:26:45

Yes

Nearly all alcoholic drinkers lose their spouse, good jobs families and so on. There are heavy drinkers who aren't alcoholics and spouces who stay but these days so many aren't really committed to marriage that a lot less leads to divorce . I quit drinking in my twenties when I faced losing every thing and don't regret a moment of life without the booze. Actually became a decent dancer without having to get drunk to fool myself into thinking I was dancing well and enjoyed watching everyone make fools out of them selves. Now days though I have no patience for drunks and appreciate that my wife is a cheap date who can get loose on one glass of wine. Life is good.

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rolliby 2013/02/08 20:56:09

Yes

No doubt about it. A drinker and a non-drinker rarely ever stay together long.

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Stan Kapusta 2013/02/08 02:18:44

Yes

I've seen it destroy good people. One drinks and thinks nothing of it. The other does but not a big part of the lifestyle. As time goes on it works like a wedge. The accepted differences in the beginning become a major source of irritation.

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El Prez 2013/02/08 00:46:52

Yes

Especially if she drinks cheap wine andhe drinks beer!!!!

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Queen Tamara/Tamar Mepe 2013/02/08 00:34:59

Yes

Ruined my first marriage
But a great many other things contribute to DOOMED relatioships

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tytyvyllus 2013/02/08 00:34:07

Yes

yet incombatibility in any arena can damage relationships.

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La 2013/02/07 22:23:53

Yes

But so can incompatible other habits. My sister wants a dog, her boyfriend doesn't. Her boyfriend smokes pot, she wants him to stop. Etc etc.

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Samantha Lewis 2013/02/07 22:20:14

Yes

+1
There is drinking and then a drunk.

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Chrissi 2013/02/07 21:54:22

Yes

+1
If you've ever been with an alcoholic, you know how sneaky they are: At the beginning of the relationship, you might not have clue about it....& who drinks what and when can lead to a serious discussion. In conclusion, when a relationship is excessively teetering on the alcohol question, it's headed in the wrong direction. Now have one for me!

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Mj PINKYFINGERDOWN 2013/02/07 21:48:12 (edited)
brittany 2013/02/07 21:41:44

Yes

i think so.

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..tisha... 2013/02/07 21:35:19

Yes

I drink a little more then I should and a bit more then he does, but I never drink to the point of excess, I drink to relax not to get drunk- a glass of wine every other night is usually my only bad habit. However, Excessive drinking to the point that it leads to destructive behavior will lead to trouble in any healthy relationship. I know a couple who are going through some issues because one is an excessive drinker and just got fired and arrested for hitting a parked car while drunk and not reporting it---it didn't help that it was in her own apartment parking lot....

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Arianne 2013/02/07 21:23:27

Yes

I understand Casual drinking or partying. But outright alcoholism all the time will be enough for me to axe the relationship

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wpsark_BN_0 2013/02/07 21:21:56

Yes

well you gotta have similiar interests. A couple who drinks happily together, stays together.

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Xan 2013/02/07 20:43:59

No

Oh, drinking habits, I thought it meant your preferred alcoholic drink of choice...

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Luv♥Luv 2013/02/07 20:19:05

Yes

Yes, for the most part.

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chucky 2013/02/07 19:52:16

Yes

+1
I would not want my wife to be drunk every night,as would she not want to see me drunk all the time.

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Footage 2013/02/07 19:42:18

Yes

They certainly "can".

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☆ElenaDiamond☆ 2013/02/07 19:35:10

Yes

Yes. I won't tolerate a sot. I am not against drinking and occasionally take a glass of wine, however I have children, and if booze is a mainstay in your life, it would cause a lot of friction. It's not a judgement, I don't dislike drinkers, I just think our lifestyles are incompatible.

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Tordgaard 2013/02/07 18:53:35

Yes

+1
Yes, they can and they often do.

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CoinOperatedJoy 2013/02/07 17:41:38

Yes

+1
Sadly, yes. If you wanna party-party-party-party don't stop and your partner does NOT want to party, there will be issues.

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Karen Hill 2013/02/07 17:01:52

Yes

+1
Very detrimental.

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john 2013/02/07 16:53:16

No

+1
Unless one drinks excessively ......

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Monty 2013/02/07 16:50:43

Yes

most certainly

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AM 2013/02/07 16:24:45

Yes

+2
I would think excessive drinking would be far more detrimental and destructive.

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Ikihi 2013/02/07 15:15:20 (edited)

Yes

anyone who said no doesn't know what they are talking about. yes it "can" doom a relationship, as it is possible.

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Gothic Kitty 2013/02/07 15:15:10

No

+1
My mom has a glass of wine just about every night, but my dad rarely drinks. They have been happily married of 22 years.

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Ikihi to Gothic ... 2013/02/07 15:15:57

+2
thats not heavy drinking

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Gothic ... to Ikihi 2013/02/12 14:47:10

compared to my father she is.

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Larry M to Gothic ... 2013/02/11 22:29:30

Add four or five glasses every night and things might have been different. You mom didn't get smashed every night , a big difference.

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SW 2013/02/07 14:59:44

Yes

"Incompatible Drinking Habits..." hahah that's a great euphimism. That's like saying a rapist and rape victim have "incompatible consent criteria."

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John Wa... to SW 2013/02/07 18:20:53

Eh.... I don't think that's the direction the article intended to go with.

Little too extreme SW.

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SW to John Wa... 2013/02/07 18:30:39 (edited)

That's true...

My point is it's worse than that sort of anticeptic and detatched albeit accurate description makes it sound. Maybe not *that much worse though... ;) I can't think of a closer metaphor but I'm sure there is one... "incompatible drinking habits" makes it sound like one partner thinks it "tastes great" while the other thinks it's "less filling" and that causes tension hahah..

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John Wa... to SW 2013/02/07 18:46:33

Very understandable then. and yea, the author did choose his words carefully...

Not sure what analogy would fit to be honest so I can't suggest one either.

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Tropiceagle33 2013/02/07 14:58:36

No

+2
for every problem there is a solution, if my Boo has a problem that could doom our relationship, we'll try and work it out and if not then i will know and take it from there. Giving up is way too cheap and cozy

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Todd Parsons 2013/02/07 14:42:12

Yes

Just like incompatible Religions, Politics, Sex drives, etc.... that's why they are called incompatible.

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Princess 2013/02/07 14:35:42

Yes

I have proof of this happening it sucks.

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Professor Wizard 2013/02/07 14:23:24
wtxwoman 2013/02/07 14:12:48

Yes

I know upteen marriages that have went down the drain because of too much drinking, mine included. Alcohol is worse, by far, than all the rest of the drugs combined, on relationships!

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macbeth 2013/02/07 13:54:56

Yes

I'm sure they can, but it ain't necessarily so.
I drink, but my other half doesn't. The only result has been that I drink less than I otherwise would. Which I guess is a good thing ;)

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