Admit It: Do You Hate It When Your Single Friend Finds Love?

Living 2012/04/09 18:00:00
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We have to admire a writer for How About We coming clean about something almost everybody feels but hardly anyone admits: It stinks when your single pal finds new love. "Deep, terrible confession time: sometimes I really think it sucks when one of my girl friends gets a boyfriend. So selfish, I know!" the writer confesses.

We've been there, and we know she's right. Suddenly, your Saturday night playmate is unavailable. Your wingman or wingwoman is paired off -- you're on your own in the dating world. And often, you're on your own, period.

"When I’m single, my fellow single ladies can feel like my lifeboat. They’re the ones who are always up for spontaneous nights out, the ones who will engage self-deprecating banter about spinsterhood, the ones I can freely text on a random night because I’m fairly sure that they, like me, are sitting around their apartment watching TV, too," the writer confesses.

But once your pal gets into a serious relationship, he or she tends to be M.I.A. As the writer for the article puts it, "...suddenly she only ever wants to hang out during the day: brunch, or lunch, or coffee. Because weekend nights are usually exclusively for him. And if you do manage to drag her out at night, she won’t have the same abandon she did when she was single. She’ll seem slightly distracted, she’ll check her phone a lot, she’ll yawn and want to head home way earlier than she ever used to."

So sad, but so true. Do you feel abandoned when your single friends pair off? Or are you genuinely happy for them?

Read More: http://www.howaboutwe.com/date-report/it-sometimes...

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Top Opinion

  • Melizmatic 2012/04/09 21:49:57
    >>>"We've been there, and we know she's right."<<<

    Sounds like you're just a bunch of self-absorbed haters, to me.


    I'm genuinely happy for my friends when they find love, regardless of my own romantic status.

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  • Chi~Cat 2012/04/10 03:21:42
    Au contraire!
  • Sylmkael 2012/04/10 03:10:14
    I would be glad he/she have found someone to be with
    So they can both enjoy & share everything that life can bring them
  • HannahIsHaunted 2012/04/10 02:57:49
    Granted, I sometimes tend to get lonely when I'm single and my friends aren't, but I'm happy for them. And sometimes we all just hang out together.
  • Twinkle 2012/04/10 02:52:00 (edited)
    I'm happy for her or him but when they're with me and talk on the phone for hours when with me I get so pissed.
  • Paige 2012/04/10 02:30:27
    No.....I think it's great! Everyone deserves happiness
  • angel face 2012/04/10 02:27:53
    angel face
    It only becomes a problem when a friend starts ignoring all her friends just to spend all her available time with him. Thats not kewl
  • KoAm 2012/04/10 02:25:11
    Uh ... actually ... no. I have never felt that way. Not even when I single and had no boyfriend. (I'm married now.)
  • Scott ヶBrony Of PHAETヶ 2012/04/10 02:23:05
    Scott ヶBrony Of PHAETヶ
    I don't do friends in the first place.
  • Lord Claremorris 2012/04/10 02:17:40
    Lord Claremorris
    I don't even care. I spend so much time alone I wouldn't even notice the difference. I like being alone, and if they quit dragging me out to the bar on the weekend I wouldn't be sad at all. I'd be relieved. The only thing that would annoy me would be if they constantly talked about it.
  • Nekosarethebest 2012/04/10 02:09:28
  • apaтнeтιc lycanтнrope 2012/04/10 02:08:14
    apaтнeтιc lycanтнrope
    I'm fine with it.

    The only thing I don't want is for them to come to me with their relationship problems. I've heard enough to last me a lifetime. Sorry. I'll bury a body with you, but I refuse to be your relationship counselor.
    Lol, I'm kidding about the body part.
  • xXmIsSuNdErStoOdXx 2012/04/10 02:06:06
    If they're happy, so am I :) #ladiesnightout
  • justnotsaying (: 2012/04/10 02:03:38
    justnotsaying (:
    Not at all. I hate it when they come to me, constantly complaining about the one they so called love.
  • Resp 2012/04/10 02:01:48
    Yes! Especially when they share the same bed that I'm sleeping in.
  • wackychocolate221 2012/04/10 02:00:24 (edited)
    I am happy for them.
  • LaiLaiHart 2012/04/10 01:56:07
    im happy for them
  • Liv 2012/04/10 01:54:10
    Not in general, only when they completely abandon me for them.
  • XSummerX Tokio Hotel Freak(= 2012/04/10 01:53:24
    XSummerX Tokio Hotel Freak(=
    Honestly, yes. Don't get me wrong I'll be happy for them but then I feel like the third wheel and i just awkwardly stand there like "Yep, i love.... my dog."
  • FanOreilly 2012/04/10 01:46:35
    NO I hope we all find a wonderful spouse like I did.
  • Met 2012/04/10 01:41:38
    Look at all these lyin' ass haters in here.

    Just be honest, Yoko Ono's suck ass.
  • Jonathan 2012/04/10 01:34:23
    If I Hated it then I would always find hate in myself; Hate is bad.
  • emface 2012/04/10 01:32:12
    Because friends always thrown on the back burner. :( Most of my friends had a hard time balancing friendships and boyfriends. But I am used to it now. Since most of them get hitched or move in together anyway... ;) I guess I would be the same way, were it me. It still sucks though!
    friendship torn between boyfriend
  • Zamboni - Madoka Magica fan... 2012/04/10 01:25:32
    Zamboni - Madoka Magica fan BN0
    I am happy for my friends happiness. I can, however, get sad at the fact that I have no partner.
  • Rhi-ot. 2012/04/10 01:24:34
  • Walter Harris 2012/04/10 01:21:26
    Walter Harris
    love is great. I'm married
  • SilveryRow 2012/04/10 01:08:36
    What a question!
  • JoshuaHarper 2012/04/10 01:00:18
    I'd be happy for them
  • Waiting in the Wings 2012/04/10 00:52:46
    Waiting in the Wings
    Good for them, but don't invite me if all they're going to do is fondle each other in front of me or suck each other's face, don't invite me to be the third wheel. It also feels like they're inviting me to watch which is super creepy and not my thing. I also don't want to talk about him all the damn time. Also keep in mind that it's rude to keep checking your phone all the time when we do get a moment to hang out together.
  • retrograve 2012/04/10 00:50:20 (edited)
    I want them to be lonely sad bitches with me.
  • Howard retrograve 2012/04/10 01:07:41
    Love your profile pic! Dragon's Lair was KING of the arcades in '83! :-D
  • retrograve Howard 2012/04/10 01:41:17
    Lol, I'd tried playing it but I kept dying! So hard, man.
  • Howard 2012/04/10 00:47:43
    More power to 'em! I wish them luck. It usually just means I'm hanging out with different friends -- for a while ;-)
  • Miko 2012/04/10 00:07:49
    If u think by this way; so u don't deserve to befriend him/her.
  • Catgirl 2012/04/09 23:56:00
    I don't hate it, i'm always ready to be happy for my friends, but i hate being the third wheel. When my freinds get in a relationship they act like i should WANT to 'hang out' with them, but really i'm just sitting there awkwardly as they make out... >_>
  • redneck 2012/04/09 23:52:45
    Good for them,being alone sucks.
  • vinone 2012/04/09 23:52:00
    Good for them, I'm fine with it, normally it doesn't last anyways. lol
  • POWERSHAKER 2012/04/09 23:35:55
  • MiinaNiemi03 2012/04/09 23:27:38
    Can't say that I do, as I am in love myself! Even before I fell in love with my now fiance I never became jealous of my friends, however it did suck being the 3rd or 5th wheel if I went out with couples to a movie or dinner but I got over that quick.
  • BabyBear 2012/04/09 23:27:34
    My friends & I are very close, we've been through the best & worst with each other. When one finds love, it's wonderful. ...because we know the initial lust phase where he/she is oblivious to everything else will wear off in a few months. We're best friends, not fair-weathered friends, which I think the writes is (a friend so long as they are most important )
  • shell 2012/04/09 23:16:34
    Not so much for jealousy reasons, probably for self pity. Once someone has had love in their life, if that goes south, that's very painful. There is a huge part of ourselves that longs for that closeness and conection from someone special again. Whether if we are willing to admit out loud or not. So for reasons of self pity, that's where the angst comes into play. A longing to recapture the warmth and connection of a loving relationship for ourselves.

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2016/02/13 13:03:04

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