Would you label a happily married man who slept with another man bi-sexual?
2789847
2012/05/07 05:59:05
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Top Opinion
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Aksana 2012/05/07 14:15:16
Also, you "can" be happily married without sex. In the beginning of most relationships the attraction is physical. As the relationship grows a deeper feeling develops. What if a man is paralyzed, or is unable to have sex because of some other physical problem? Is he destined to always be unhappy? Can he/they be happily married? I've interviewed many couples where neither one was interested in sex. In most of these case they were very much in love and very happy in their relationship. Maybe it's just you that can't be happily married without sex.
So when I wrote, “I can’t imagine a homosexual man who is married to a heterosexual woman describe his marriage as happy,” I was not responding to the hypothetical scenario introduced by WILDBOY2008.
Regardless, the core point where you and I disagree is on the importance of sex in a healthy relationship. You are correct when you speculated that I would not be happy in a marriage without sex. I will even go one step further and declare that I would be miserable.
I must concede that my position on the importance of sex in a healthy marriage is predominantly anecdotal. There is research available, but I have not read it.
http://bit.ly/KHB1qM
You didn't specify if the man is married to another man though. So these answers assuming you're talking about being married to a woman:
However, if he were a good friend and confided this to me, I would ask if he was bisexual, bicurious, or maybe more than that. Frankly it wouldn't make any difference to me. A friend is a friend unless said friend commits one of the deadly friendship sins: sleeps with MY s.o. Harms me, my s.o, my child or pet. Steals from myself or a family member. Betrays my trust on more than once occassion on a large scale.
Yes if his wife didn't know (some married couples do have a swinger sex life, I don't judge that, to each their own so long as they don't try to get me involved in it cause it isn't my style) I'd feel bad for her, and I'd offer consulation if she felt okay confiding to me, or I'd see about maybe getting her in with a professional if she'd be more comfortable with that.
If said man is a co-worker, a co-worker is a co-worker provided they pull their own weight. I couldn't care less who my collegues sleep witih PROVIDED the other party is at the age of consent, it's consentual, and no animals are involved,...
You didn't specify if the man is married to another man though. So these answers assuming you're talking about being married to a woman:
However, if he were a good friend and confided this to me, I would ask if he was bisexual, bicurious, or maybe more than that. Frankly it wouldn't make any difference to me. A friend is a friend unless said friend commits one of the deadly friendship sins: sleeps with MY s.o. Harms me, my s.o, my child or pet. Steals from myself or a family member. Betrays my trust on more than once occassion on a large scale.
Yes if his wife didn't know (some married couples do have a swinger sex life, I don't judge that, to each their own so long as they don't try to get me involved in it cause it isn't my style) I'd feel bad for her, and I'd offer consulation if she felt okay confiding to me, or I'd see about maybe getting her in with a professional if she'd be more comfortable with that.
If said man is a co-worker, a co-worker is a co-worker provided they pull their own weight. I couldn't care less who my collegues sleep witih PROVIDED the other party is at the age of consent, it's consentual, and no animals are involved, as for his wife, same response as before.
If it's a family member I'm close to, same as a friend, ask if he's bisexual or bicurious, or possibly fully in the closet. Same response for the wife as well.
And if it's just some celeb I read about in a paper, shrug it off and go on with my life, cause frankly, who cares? I'd feel especially bad for the possibility that the wife found out through a news paper/ tabloid, but as for the actual act it's self if they're gay/straight/bi, I couldn't give less of a rat's behind.
Alternatively, same sex marriage is legal in my own backyard, and through out my country. So frankly this man could be straight up gay and having sex with his husband. So what?