Thank God for church ladies with typewriters.

Welshtaff 2012/08/20 23:51:51

They're Back!

Those wonderful Church
Bulletins! Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences (with
all the BLOOPERS) actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in
church service

The Fasting & Prayer
Conference includes meals.

The sermon this
morning: Jesus walks on the Water.

The sermon
tonight: Searching for Jesus.

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a
chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring
your husbands.

Remember in prayer the many who are
sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to
someone who doesn't care much about you.

Don't let worry
kill you off - let the Church help.

Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not
pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

For those of you
who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Next Thursday
there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.

Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were
married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their
school days.

A bean supper
will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow..

At the evening service tonight, the
sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir

Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to
the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older

Scouts are saving aluminum cans,
bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple

The church will
host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.

Potluck supper
Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.

The ladies of the Church have cast
off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday

This evening at 7 PM there will be a
hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come
prepared to sin.

Ladies Bible Study will be held
Thursday morning at 10 AM . All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship
Hall after the B. S. is done.

The pastor would appreciate it if the
ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the
pancake breakfast next Sunday.

Low Self Esteem Support Group
will meet Thursday at 7 PM . Please use the back door.

The eighth-graders will be presenting
Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is
invited to attend this tragedy.

Weight Watchers
will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.

Please use large
double door at the side entrance.

The Associate Minister unveiled the
church's new campaign slogan last Sunday:” I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours

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2016/02/11 15:15:57

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