Talk "Dirty" to Me...
Melizmatic
2012/07/30 17:11:37
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12 votes
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6 votes
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23 votes
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6 votes
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So, I just overheard a conversation in the office break room that was completely innocent, but sounded so... not.
Coworker 1: "By the way, the optional life safety seminar has been rescheduled for next Tuesday."
Coworker 2: "I might drop in; I really ought to learn how to do the Heimlich maneuver."
Coworker 1: "Its not that hard, actually;
As you thrust upward, bend over, spread your legs and keep going, until it finally pops out..."
Having the dirty mind that I do, I giggled for a solid ten minutes after hearing that.
That got me to thinking;
What's the funniest unintentional innuendo that you've heard?
And while this is a fun, whimsical question, I ask that everyone please keep in mind that over-sharing of one's personal experiences isn't necessary.
Lastly, as always, please check all political and/or religious rhetoric, as there's an entire section dedicated to those types of discussions...
Coworker 1: "By the way, the optional life safety seminar has been rescheduled for next Tuesday."
Coworker 2: "I might drop in; I really ought to learn how to do the Heimlich maneuver."
Coworker 1: "Its not that hard, actually;
As you thrust upward, bend over, spread your legs and keep going, until it finally pops out..."
Having the dirty mind that I do, I giggled for a solid ten minutes after hearing that.
That got me to thinking;
What's the funniest unintentional innuendo that you've heard?
And while this is a fun, whimsical question, I ask that everyone please keep in mind that over-sharing of one's personal experiences isn't necessary.
Lastly, as always, please check all political and/or religious rhetoric, as there's an entire section dedicated to those types of discussions...
Top Opinion
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Caedus01 Sith Lord of the P... 2012/07/30 17:30:32
OMG That guy gave me the biggest one ever! (Tip)
That lady over there is so nasty, she will eat it even if its bloody. (Steak)
Keep an eye on table 2 , I think that's the guy who eats and runs without paying although I can't be sure. (the bill)
Elevators are always ripe for unintentional innuendo. "Going down?" "I don't know. Are you going up?"
;-)
I called him later on and left a message that his car was ready to by picked up and "I checked out your rear end and it looks wonderful."
An 80 year old man came to pick the car up and asked if I was the girl who left the message.
Apparently it was his car and his phone number I'd called.
"Sweety," he said. "I ain't had no one compliment my ass in a loooonnngg time. You made my day."
Sample Lady 1: "If you will take my panties to the conference room, I will stop by and get us a drink for afterwards."
Sample Guy 1: "Go bring your thongs out so we can display them on the end caps."
Sample Lady 2: "We've got to get your panties out of the display so we can replace them with your bra collection."
;-)
=D
http://www.galasource.com/Fet...
The apparatus in your neighborhood may vary?
I honestly don't remember the funniest innuendo....
It's slow at the office, today;
I was bored and that tickled me, so I decided to share...
I didn't say anything. I excused myself to the bathroom and busted out laughing.