Talk "Dirty" to Me...
Melizmatic
2012/07/30 17:11:37
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So, I just overheard a conversation in the office break room that was completely innocent, but sounded so... not.
Coworker 1: "By the way, the optional life safety seminar has been rescheduled for next Tuesday."
Coworker 2: "I might drop in; I really ought to learn how to do the Heimlich maneuver."
Coworker 1: "Its not that hard, actually;
As you thrust upward, bend over, spread your legs and keep going, until it finally pops out..."
Having the dirty mind that I do, I giggled for a solid ten minutes after hearing that.
That got me to thinking;
What's the funniest unintentional innuendo that you've heard?
And while this is a fun, whimsical question, I ask that everyone please keep in mind that over-sharing of one's personal experiences isn't necessary.
Lastly, as always, please check all political and/or religious rhetoric, as there's an entire section dedicated to those types of discussions...
Coworker 1: "By the way, the optional life safety seminar has been rescheduled for next Tuesday."
Coworker 2: "I might drop in; I really ought to learn how to do the Heimlich maneuver."
Coworker 1: "Its not that hard, actually;
As you thrust upward, bend over, spread your legs and keep going, until it finally pops out..."
Having the dirty mind that I do, I giggled for a solid ten minutes after hearing that.
That got me to thinking;
What's the funniest unintentional innuendo that you've heard?
And while this is a fun, whimsical question, I ask that everyone please keep in mind that over-sharing of one's personal experiences isn't necessary.
Lastly, as always, please check all political and/or religious rhetoric, as there's an entire section dedicated to those types of discussions...
Top Opinion
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Caedus01 Sith Lord of the P... 2012/07/30 17:30:32
Then I said the ink in the pad must be runny... heheh
Then there was this girl whose cat just died and when we asked how, she said her cat ate a mouse and started frothing up at the mouth and behaving funny. ;P
Me: how much would u like nan
Nan: just one donut thanks but i want the bowl near ful with whipped cream please
Me: ok
Nan: ohh and make sure u make the cream REALLY thick and creamy and fill the hole with it please, i dont want there to be any going to waste
Me: trust me nan it is thick and creamy, i made it myself, and u want it going right through the hole do u? want a liquorish stick with that to *lil giggle to myself*
Nan: ooh ok cool as! and yes right throught the hole please. and ohh yes i wouldnt mind a liquorish stick actually, but make sure its hard, i dont want it flopping everywhere and then not be able to get it into my mouth
*i drop to the floor laughing my head off!!* *nan just looks at me with a confused look* haha lol it was pree epic
That's so messed up.
hhfgahfah totally that's what she said! dirty break room people!
"Lastly, as always, please check all your political and/or religious rhetoric, as there's an entire section dedicated to those types of discussions..."
If abiding by the simple parameters I set isn't your strong suit, there are plenty of questions and polls in News and Politics.
Please don't bring politics up again, this question is in the Fun & Humor section for a good reason.
*screams in terror*
That's such a relief.
*lolz
;-)
:)
My mind pretty much stays in the gutter these days LOL
I know I have better examples but can't think of them at the moment. (damn it)