Police Stop

Kat ♪ ~ ♪ 2012/11/09 02:45:10

A mature lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Traffic Cop: Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Traffic Cop: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one.

Traffic Cop: Don't have one?

Older Woman: No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Traffic Cop: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please..

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Traffic Cop: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Traffic Cop: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Traffic Cop: You what!?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The traffic cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his
car while calling for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the
car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half
drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Are you serious?!

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The traffic cop is quite stunned.

Officer 2: My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license quizzically.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, but I am puzzled, as I was told
by my officer here that you didn't have a license, that you stole this
car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner!

Older Woman: Bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too.

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  • Th8nos 2012/12/04 12:45:52
  • timothy.hill.14 2012/11/10 08:50:26
    Ha ha nice way to discredit the stopping officer.
  • Lanikai 2012/11/09 22:16:11
    That is great.
  • michael 2012/11/09 19:50:33
    that is funny
  • John 2012/11/09 19:35:18
    some never get old
  • Pyro-82 2012/11/09 18:17:36
    This is too great!!!
    God why can't their be more people like this?
  • Maize and blue 2012/11/09 16:55:42
    Maize and blue
    hellllls to the yeah
  • Amasaman 2012/11/09 16:31:14
  • Meadow 2012/11/09 16:03:15
  • dwight 2012/11/09 16:00:12
    good one
  • AlwaysThinkin 2012/11/09 15:45:51
    Hilarious! I needed that for the day. TGIF!
  • Kiki 2012/11/09 15:30:08
    HILLARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!! laughing
  • terrabytes 2012/11/09 15:09:34
  • Icon 2012/11/09 15:01:53
  • The Amazin' Guru of Chibis 2012/11/09 14:51:38
    The Amazin' Guru of Chibis
    Brilliant! crazy old lady in a car
  • santa6642 2012/11/09 14:33:03
    Sounds about right.
  • Kurt 2012/11/09 12:12:12
    Not even funny, sorry. Old bag needs to be brought to a hospital to see what meds she is off.
  • Kat ♪ ~ ♪ Kurt 2012/11/09 12:34:25
    Kat ♪ ~ ♪
    It's a joke, lighten up.
  • Lanikai Kurt 2012/11/09 22:17:11
    Were you born without a sense of humor?
  • Kurt Lanikai 2012/11/17 11:51:33
    Lately, people I have. : )
  • S123 Kurt 2012/11/16 21:31:27
    Why would she be on meds? Beacause she was speeding and she lied to a police officer?
  • Somkey the Hores 2012/11/09 09:40:46
  • rebeccasrevenge 2012/11/09 08:09:53
    A little girl wants to take her dog ,Lady for a walk.Her father said no because Lady was in heat.He thought about it and said "Well, maybe if I put a little gasoline on her rear end it'll mask the scent" and let the girl take her for a walk.A while later the girl returns and her father asks "Where is Lady? to which she replies "Lady ran out of gas down the street and a neighbor's dog is pushing her home"
  • gldynmd BTO-t-BCRA-F 2012/11/09 07:44:17
  • eli.jamison.77 2012/11/09 06:19:17
    haha great idea!
  • Tennessee3501 2012/11/09 06:16:03
    LOL ! Great joke! I hope you do not have a copyright on it, because I am copying it and sending it to several friends not on SodaHead!
  • jack frost 2012/11/09 05:38:40
    jack frost
    best ways to get rid of a police officer after pulled over
    officer says do you know why i pulled you over

    you say in a weird voice "you want to play the game"

    officer ""what game"

    you "the find the drugs in the car game"

    then at that point the officer will take you out of your car an put you in the back of his and then wait fourty five minutes for a k9 unit to show up then the dog will rip through your car without mercy once the dog has not found any illeagle substance the cos will have forgotten why he pulled you ofwr in the first place and he shall let you go

    part two in getting rid of a cop is

    cop says "do you know why i pulled you over"


    cop looks at you weird walks away slowly and drives off

    part three in getting rid of a cop

    cop says do you know why i pulled you over

    you "well i imagen it was because i was speeding well you see i farted and i had to raise i butt off the seat to let the air pass through but as i did i intenvertantly pushed the gas pedal causing me to speed up to the point where i excelled the speed limit but i had mexican food for lunch and indian for dinner and you know the combination of that and its probaly what you are breathing right now and i am sorry it is offensive and i am sorry"
    those are the ways to get rid of a police officer after you hav been pulled over
  • wolfshadow 2012/11/09 05:21:00

  • jubil8 BN-0 PON 2012/11/09 04:34:09
    jubil8 BN-0 PON
    The moral of the story is "Don't mess with old ladies -- old doesn't mean stupid." :)
  • LMA 2012/11/09 04:06:46
    Brilliant wish some one would try that
  • Cain 2012/11/09 03:50:42 (edited)
    That was funny.....
    arrested old lady
  • TheLightBehindYourEyes 2012/11/09 03:19:11
    I'm sure this will be hilarious once I get the joke...but I really dont get it....anyone care to ruin the moment and explain =)
  • America... TheLigh... 2012/11/09 03:50:49
    American Nate
    she lied to him and made him sound crazy.
  • TheLigh... America... 2012/11/09 04:09:51
    Ah...thank you for the response
  • Tim 2012/11/09 03:05:43
    Lol, I must try and remember that one.
  • Heffeweizen 2012/11/09 02:56:36
  • sonofason 2012/11/09 02:55:51
  • Jbug799 2012/11/09 02:50:13
    LOL she would be in trouble!!!
  • Cricket 2012/11/09 02:48:42
  • Lady Willpower 2012/11/09 02:48:41

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2016/02/07 04:05:30

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