In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods
☥☽✪☾DAW ☽✪☾
2011/05/26 17:04:04
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In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand." -- In the manual for a Swedish chainsaw.
Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand." -- In the manual for a Swedish chainsaw.
Do not look into laser with remaining eye." -- On a laser pointer.
"Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.
"For use on animals only." -- On an electric cattle prod.
"For use by trained personnel only." -- On a can of air freshener.
Warning: May contain nuts." -- On a package of peanuts.
"Do not eat." -- On a slip of paper in a stereo box, referring to the styrofoam packing.
"Do not eat if seal is missing." -- On said seal.
"Remove occupants from the stroller before folding it."
"Access hole only -- not intended for use in lifting box." -- On the sides of a shipping
carton, just above cut-out openings which one would assume were handholds.
carton, just above cut-out openings which one would assume were handholds.
"Warning: May cause drowsiness." -- On a bottle of Nytol, a brand of sleeping pills.
"Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death." -- Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle.
"Do not use orally after using rectally." -- In the instructions for an electric thermometer.
"Turn off motor before using this product." -- On the packaging for a chain saw file, used to sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain.
"Not to be used as a personal flotation device." -- On a 6x10 inch inflatable picture frame.
"Do not put in mouth." -- On a box of bottle rockets.
"Remove plastic before eating." -- On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack.
"Not dishwasher safe." -- On a remote control for a TV.
"For lifting purposes only." -- On the box for a car jack.
"Do not put lit candles on phone." -- On the instructions for a cordless phone.
"Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants." -- On the packaging for a wristwatch.
"Keep out of reach of children and teenagers." -- On a can of air freshener.
"Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you." -- On a motorcycle helmet-mounted rear-view mirror.
"Warning: Riders of personal watercraft may suffer injury due to the forceful injection of water into body cavities either by falling into the water or while mounting the craft." -- In the manual for a jetski.
"Warning: Do not climb inside this bag and zip it up. Doing so will cause injury and death." -- A label inside a protective bag (for fragile objects), which measures 15cm by 15cm by 12cm.
"Do not use as ear plugs." -- On a package of silly putty.
On Sears hair dryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
Theft of this container is a crime." -- On a milk crate.
"Do not use intimately." -- On a tube of deodorant.
"Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice." -- On a box of rat poison.
"Fragile. Do not drop." -- Posted on a Boeing 757.
"Cannot be made non-poisonous." -- On the back of a can of de-icing windshield fluid.
"Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage." -- On a portable stroller.
"Excessive dust may be irritating to shin and eyes." -- On a tube of agarose powder, used to make gels.
"Look before driving." -- On the dash board of a mail truck.
"Do not iron clothes on body." -- On packaging for a Rowenta iron.
Some Swanson frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head.
On Tesco's Tiramisu desert:
Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating
On packaging for a Rowenta Iron:
Do not iron clothes on body
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine
Do not drive car or operate machinery
On Nytol (a sleep aid):
Warning: may cause drowsiness
On a Korean-made kitchen knife:
Warning keep out of children
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
On a Japanese-made food processor:
Not to be used for the other use
On Sainsbury's Peanuts
Warning: contains nuts
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Housekeeping 1955
If a small child is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down its throat and hey presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed
Housekeeping 1955
If a small child is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down its throat and hey presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed
Top Opinion
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FYI 2011/05/26 18:09:38
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etc. etc. :)
"Liebeck v. McDonald's Restaurants, also known as the McDonald's coffee case and the hot coffee lawsuit, is a 1994 product liability lawsuit that became a flashpoint in the debate in the U.S. over tort reform after a jury awarded $2.86 million to a woman who burned herself with hot coffee she purchased from fast food restaurant McDonald's. The trial judge reduced the total award to $640,000, and the parties settled for a confidential amount before an appeal was decided." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
I think it was on purpose. I have in-laws who have "accidents" at stores and restaurants on purpose.
GREAT STUFF ! LMAO !
What it boild down to is Common Sense, and that's sad, because common sense is the one thing most of us took for granted. Like birds that fly once pushed out of the nest.
But anymore people are growing up in a dim-witted society that has to be taught not to spill hot coffee in your lap, lol.
"Keep out of reach of children and teenagers." -- On a can of air freshener
I have an idiot friend who's probably done about 10 of these.