I feel horrible :O What should I do?
Micha Vengeance Way
2012/06/12 16:34:08
Okay so I live with this girl... Lets call her Alice...
Alice is a bitch. There's no nicer way to say it. She's stuck up and rude and just a bitch. I've tried being nice to her, I've tried telling/asking her nicely to not have an attitude or be so rude to everyone, and she never freakin' stops.
So I talked to one of the staff about it (I live in a group home if you didn't know already.) and they told me she has Asperger's.
Now I feel horrible because lately I've been treating her like crap, because nothing else I've done has seemed to make her any less bitchy but this does. But now that I know that, I feel like I'm doing something horrible :o
Should I talk to her about it? Or should I just like, ignore her completely because honestly even though I know she cant help it it's SO FRUSTRATING being around her when she's in one of her moods.
I'm trying so hard to be nice but I honestly cant sometimes.
Alice is a bitch. There's no nicer way to say it. She's stuck up and rude and just a bitch. I've tried being nice to her, I've tried telling/asking her nicely to not have an attitude or be so rude to everyone, and she never freakin' stops.
So I talked to one of the staff about it (I live in a group home if you didn't know already.) and they told me she has Asperger's.
Now I feel horrible because lately I've been treating her like crap, because nothing else I've done has seemed to make her any less bitchy but this does. But now that I know that, I feel like I'm doing something horrible :o
Should I talk to her about it? Or should I just like, ignore her completely because honestly even though I know she cant help it it's SO FRUSTRATING being around her when she's in one of her moods.
I'm trying so hard to be nice but I honestly cant sometimes.
Top Opinion
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Twitch 2012/06/12 16:45:08+3I believe I have the condition. I can be very mean at times, and it's not like me at all. I guess just try to avoid her when you don't feel like dealing with her. Odds are, she probably likes being alone anyway; I do. She probably feels bad about how she acts too, she's just too prideful to admit it. But don't give yourself a hard time. No sense in it.


















Social cues and norms come about as naturally to them as trigonometry does to you. (But they're often great at trigonometry!!).
The key is figuring out how to get yourself in an accepting, patient, compassionate mindset. A big part of that may be to minimize your contact with her. But however you can get there, the more you can let yourself feel compassion, the happier you'll be with her, and with yourself.
Apologize when you do something thoughtless, but don't expect her to apologize, she probably doesn't grasp what an apology is all about. Remember that she probably gets negative reactions from folks constantly, but doesn't really grasp why or how to get that to stop. She's probably in pain a lot of the time, and much of the "rude" behavior is an almost inevitable defense against seemingly groundless rudeness from others.
Trying to treat all others with respect, even when you're pissed off, pays huge dividends over time.
Asperger's itself doesn't respond to medication, but sleep problems or mood problems might. You can possibly help her therapist by reporting problematic behaviors, not to discipline her, but to help guide therapy.
You might want to actually study up on Asperger's. Sounds a bit like someone is selling you a bill of goods:
Asperger's Syndrome - Symptoms
Although there are many possible symptoms of Asperger’s syndrome, the main symptom is significant trouble with social situations. Your child may have mild to severe symptoms or have a few or many of these symptoms. Because of the wide variety of symptoms, no two children with Asperger's are alike.
Symptoms during childhood
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Understanding Autism -- Symptoms
Each child with an autism spectrum disorder will have his or her own individual pattern of behavior: Sometimes, a child's development is delayed from birth; other children develop normally before suddenly losing social or language skills. In some children, a loss of language is the impairment; in others, unusual behaviors (like spending hours lining up toys) predominate. Parents are usually the first to notice something is wrong. Symptoms of autism include: Extreme difficulty in learning...
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Parents often first notice the symptoms of Asperger's syndrome when their child starts preschool and begins to interact with other children. Children wit...
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You might want to actually study up on Asperger's. Sounds a bit like someone is selling you a bill of goods:
Asperger's Syndrome - Symptoms
Although there are many possible symptoms of Asperger’s syndrome, the main symptom is significant trouble with social situations. Your child may have mild to severe symptoms or have a few or many of these symptoms. Because of the wide variety of symptoms, no two children with Asperger's are alike.
Symptoms during childhood
Recommended Related to Autism
Understanding Autism -- Symptoms
Each child with an autism spectrum disorder will have his or her own individual pattern of behavior: Sometimes, a child's development is delayed from birth; other children develop normally before suddenly losing social or language skills. In some children, a loss of language is the impairment; in others, unusual behaviors (like spending hours lining up toys) predominate. Parents are usually the first to notice something is wrong. Symptoms of autism include: Extreme difficulty in learning...
Read the Understanding Autism -- Symptoms article > >
Parents often first notice the symptoms of Asperger's syndrome when their child starts preschool and begins to interact with other children. Children with Asperger's syndrome may:
Not pick up on social cues and may lack inborn social skills, such as being able to read others' body language, start or maintain a conversation, and take turns talking.
Dislike any changes in routines.
Appear to lack empathy.
Be unable to recognize subtle differences in speech tone, pitch, and accent that alter the meaning of others’ speech. So your child may not understand a joke or may take a sarcastic comment literally. And his or her speech may be flat and hard to understand because it lacks tone, pitch, and accent.
Have a formal style of speaking that is advanced for his or her age. For example, the child may use the word "beckon" instead of "call" or the word "return" instead of "come back."
Avoid eye contact or stare at others.
Have unusual facial expressions or postures.
Be preoccupied with only one or few interests, which he or she may be very knowledgeable about. Many children with Asperger's syndrome are overly interested in parts of a whole or in unusual activities, such as designing houses, drawing highly detailed scenes, or studying astronomy. They may show an unusual interest in certain topics such as snakes, names of stars, or dinosaurs.
Talk a lot, usually about a favorite subject. One-sided conversations are common. Internal thoughts are often verbalized.
Have delayed motor development. Your child may be late in learning to use a fork or spoon, ride a bike, or catch a ball. He or she may have an awkward walk. Handwriting is often poor.
Have heightened sensitivity and become overstimulated by loud noises, lights, or strong tastes or textures. For more information about these symptoms, see sensory integration dysfunction.
A child with one or two of these symptoms does not necessarily have Asperger’s syndrome. To be diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome, a child must have a combination of these symptoms and significant trouble with social situations.
Although the condition is in some ways similar to autism, a child with Asperger's syndrome typically has normal language and intellectual development. Also, those with Asperger's syndrome typically make more of an effort than those with autism to make friends and engage in activities with others.
Symptoms during adolescent and teen years
Most symptoms persist through the teen years. And although teens with Asperger's can begin to learn those social skills they lack, communication often remains difficult. They will probably continue to have difficulty "reading" others' behavior.
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Seems to me the kid has found a scam to run with.......
stick with small talk and then avoid.
But talk to her too.You can at least try. You can put it in terms of "when you .... I feel ..."
or cry :D
That's actually incorrect.
Sorry, but it kind of sounded that way.
but yea try to aviod her
Why not teach her?
I don't know what to say.
I don't know what to tell you.
Let's drop it before we get upset, OK?
It's too great a day to let silly things get in the way.
I have homework, seeya later.
It's amazing (: