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Have you ever wondered what goes to hell and what doesn't? See the list here.

God-Hating Atheist Communist 2012/04/16 05:05:20
Here's the latest list of arrivals:

Hamsters - See "Politicians"
Cats - All cats go to hell.
Dogs - All dogs go to hell, except for chihuahuas and beagles, which are inanimate objects and do not have souls.
Horses - All horses go to hell.
Christians - All Christians go to hell, except for one specific subset/denomination of Christians that is the correct subset and goes to heaven.
Muslims - All Muslims go to hell, except for one specific subset of Islam that God, for some reason, decided was good enough to go to heaven.
Pagans - All Pagans go to hell.
Atheists - Atheists go to hell, but I have a special place in hell reserved for Atheists that is actually quite nice.
Lawyers - Hell.
Politicians - I don't allow such evil into my realm. Politicians are rejected from hell and sent back to Earth in the form of cockroaches.
Rapists/Murderers/Pedophiles - See "Politicians".
David Bowie: See "Atheists".
Micheal Jackson - See "Politicians".
Nicola Tesla, Albert Einstein, Mark Twain, Leonardo DaVinci, Archimedes, Plato, Socrates, Isaac Newton (He's an asshole by the way), Gottfried Leibniz (Hates Isaac), Erwin Schrödinger, Richard Feynman, Neils Bohr (Doesn't get along with Einstein), Carl Sagan, Jules Verne, Satyendra Bose, Freddie Mercury (Learned a thing or two from Brian Mays): Not dead, running secret physics project somewhere in eastern Canada.
Thomas Edison: See "Politicians"
All dead former U.S Presidents except for Thomas Jefferson: See "Politicians"
Thomas Jefferson: See "Atheists"
Gingers: Inanimate objects, therefore no soul.
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2014/04/20 15:56:48

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