A few about how O-Vomit can't win!
The pResident is running down the street one day, and he sees a
little girl who is giving away puppies that her dog just had.
He goes up to the girl and says, "Little
girl, I think that it's wonderful that you're doing such a good thing."
The little girl says, "Thank you, Mr. Obama.
Would you like a puppy? They're Democrats."
Obama declines and jogs onward. The next day he
jogs past the same girl and decides to talk to her again. "You know what,
little girl? I think I'll take one of those puppies after all, seeing as how
The girl says, "I'm sorry Mr. Obama, but
they're not Democrats any more. They're Republican now."
Obama says, "They are? How do you know? As a
matter of fact, how did you know that they were Democrats at first to begin
She says, "Well, just after they were born
they were Democrats, but now their eyes are open."
Tired of his
low approval ratings, President Obama called up the head of the CIA and said,
"I want your very best agent over here first thing in the morning."
Moments later, a call went out to the Middle East,
and the most gifted American agent was headed back to Washington.
The next morning, the agent was escorted into the
Oval Office. The President said, "I hear you're the best in the business.
I can't trust what my staff tells me.
So I want you to visit every state in the union,
every major city. I want you to stay out on the road until you have an idea of
what the vast majority of Americans would like to see happen in the Oval
The CIA agent responded affirmatively. He left the
White House and wasn't heard from for nearly four months. Finally, he showed up
early on a Saturday morning, and the President saw him immediately.
The President said, "Did you find out what an
overwhelming majority of Americans want done here in this office?"
"Well, then, express the will of the
people," Obama ordered.
So the agent stood up, pulled out a gun, and shot