Who Is the Lamest Excuse for a Country Singer?
Miranda Lambert praised Paltrow's performance of "Country Strong" at Wednesday's CMA Awards, but the L.A.- and NYC-raised actress just doesn't feel country to us.
Simpson calls Dolly Parton her idol, but the pop star's attempt to perform "9 to 5" at the 2006 Kennedy Center Honors fell infamously flat.
Costner has his own country rock band, the eponymous Kevin Costner and Modern West. Who knew? But we think Costner's about as believable as a country star as he is as Whitney's Houston's bodyguard.
Jewel is commonly known as the pop star who used to live in her car. But she released her first country record, "Perfectly Clear," in 2008.
Hootie & the Blowfish are pretty much synonymous with mainstream pop, but in 2008, lead singer Darius Rucker signed to Capitol Records Nashville as a country music artist.
Jon Bon Jovi
You may associate him with '80s hair bands, but in 2006, Bon Jovie's duet version of "Who Says You Can't Go Home" with country singer Jennifer Nettles was a hit on the country music chart.
In the '70s, Newton-John had country hits with "Let Me Be There" and "I Honestly Love You." At the time, purists said the English-born, Aussie-raised singer did not belong in country music.
In other words, she wasn't exactly crying into a bottle of beer over her break-up with Brad Pitt. More like champagne, if anything.
But like her old buddy Madonna, Gwyn is known for personality transformations. Not too long ago, she attracted public ridicule for her lifestyle newsletter GOOP -- which apparently is meant to teach peons like us to be as skinny and perfect as she is.
So we can't take her all that seriously when the GOOP goddess tries to sell herself as a country star to promote her new movie "Country Song," out Dec. 22. Sure, her performance of the title song at Wednesday night's CMA Awards wasn't bad, but it wasn't really country, either.
That said, Paltrow received a warm welcome (and a standing ovation) from legitimate country stars.
"Gwyneth is a great singer. She did a great job, I think," Miranda Lambert told USA Today after the show. "She sounded really country, I think."
We'll admit we were impressed that she played the guitar. But overall, Paltrow belongs at the CMAs about as much as Dolly Parton fits in on Park Avenue, doncha think?
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