What's you favorite Chuck Norris fact?

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What's you favorite Chuck Norris fact?

by Ricky Posted May 31, 2007 00:45:17

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		Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
		There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
		Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
		The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
		Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING
	no my favorit is.....

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+3 raves DELETED October 25, 2007 04:06:26

Answered: no my favorit is.....
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Twisted Victor October 16, 2008 03:12:09

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn’t stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
Party Boy [A7X Bat] September 03, 2008 21:54:46

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.
Smoky August 30, 2008 21:42:44

Answered: There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
lol, he's my fav yugio card
Party B... to Smoky September 03, 2008 21:55:47

hell yeah!!!
Smoky to Party B... September 04, 2008 12:05:13

lol
roxypup555 August 14, 2008 17:48:24

Answered: no my favorit is.....
i have alot
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars that's why there are no signs of life there.
SWCA Surfer4life July 29, 2008 22:04:48 (edited)

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris doesn't use a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris or

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad
ThatGuyFromTheMovie June 26, 2008 17:58:08 (edited)

Answered: no my favorit is.....
theres no life on mars because chuck norris ben there
Kd June 26, 2008 02:21:25

Answered: no my favorit is.....
My brother came up wit this:
Your mom is so hot... she slept with Chuck Norris!!!
Kind of lame but it was funny when he said it lol.
Then I like once there was nothing then Chuck Norris kicked nothing and told it to get a job... now there is the universe.
pantherhlc May 12, 2008 20:35:06

Answered: There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
where do you guys get all this stuff? :)
roxypup555 to pantherhlc August 14, 2008 17:50:50

go to google and type in chuck norris facts
superMILLIE May 11, 2008 09:57:22

Answered: no my favorit is.....
no matter what your mother ever said, Chuck Norris can always tune a fish :)
xx
+*+*+Raindropp+*+*+ May 08, 2008 00:18:29

Answered: no my favorit is.....
It has been scientifcly proven chuck norris can kick you into next month
and this is chuck norris' toliet paper
Mr. Randy Watson May 07, 2008 20:31:22

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you...Fourty seven times.

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

For Chuck Norris, every street is "one way". HIS WAY.

The best part of waking up, is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.

Chuck Norris needs a monkeywrench and a blowtorch to masturbate.

Remember The Ultimate Warrior? He quit wrestling because Chuck Norris wanted his nickname back.

Chuck Norris actually owns IBM. It was an extremely hostile takeover.

He, who laughs last, laughs best. He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.

Chuck Norris is like a dog, not only because he can smell fear, but because he can piss on whatever he wants.

Whoever said "only the good die young" was probably in Chuck Norris's kindergarten class.

Instead of having a cigarette after sex, Chuck Norris heads outside and brands his cattle.

Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.

Chuck Norris did not "lose" his virginity, he stalked it and then destroyed it with extreme prejudice.

Chuck Norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time.

Chuck Norris wipes his ass with chain mail and sandpaper.

Rules of ...

Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you...Fourty seven times.

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

For Chuck Norris, every street is "one way". HIS WAY.

The best part of waking up, is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.

Chuck Norris needs a monkeywrench and a blowtorch to masturbate.

Remember The Ultimate Warrior? He quit wrestling because Chuck Norris wanted his nickname back.

Chuck Norris actually owns IBM. It was an extremely hostile takeover.

He, who laughs last, laughs best. He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.

Chuck Norris is like a dog, not only because he can smell fear, but because he can piss on whatever he wants.

Whoever said "only the good die young" was probably in Chuck Norris's kindergarten class.

Instead of having a cigarette after sex, Chuck Norris heads outside and brands his cattle.

Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.

Chuck Norris did not "lose" his virginity, he stalked it and then destroyed it with extreme prejudice.

Chuck Norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time.

Chuck Norris wipes his ass with chain mail and sandpaper.

Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.

Chuck Norris is the only man who has, literally, beaten the odds. With his fists.

"Brokeback Mountain" is not just a movie. It's also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.

Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder for the simple fact that his roundhouse kicks are recognized world-wide as "acts of God."

Chuck Norris is not Politically Correct. He is just Correct. Always.

Chuck Norris doesn't believe in ravioli. He stuffs a live turtle with beef and smothers it in pig's blood.
(more)
+1 raves
Wes May 06, 2008 13:42:03

Answered: no my favorit is.....
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

And finally, the one i really laughed at.

Chuck Norris can beat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
g May 04, 2008 14:37:04

Answered: no my favorit is.....
moderated...
+1 raves
Voltron (Metal Wolf) April 15, 2008 17:27:39

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris is standing behind you right now. This is the last thing you will ever read.
+1 raves
Zach February 24, 2008 23:23:38

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lays potato chip.
+1 raves
Roylee February 24, 2008 22:59:21

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a guy in the face so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and hit Amelia Earhart and made her crash in the pacific ocean.
Suicide and Redemption~In G... February 10, 2008 22:50:22

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer, to bad Chuck Norris doesn't cry.

Why was the boogyman in the closet?
Chuck Norris was under the bed.
+1 raves
qweffe February 09, 2008 00:19:27

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Hooch(ElBlancoDiablo) February 06, 2008 14:38:38

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris doesn't get wet, wet gets Chuck Norris.
-1 raves
insectual January 05, 2008 09:21:04

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Who the f--k cares!?
RealistMark December 20, 2007 02:57:53

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris isn't hung like a horse...a horse is hung like Chuck Norris.
+1 raves
Witty Wizard November 02, 2007 17:31:00

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Chuck Norris once ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
+3 raves
DELETED October 25, 2007 04:06:26

Answered: no my favorit is.....
moderated...
Party B... to DELETED September 10, 2008 21:45:38

lol
chuck norris can slam a revolving door
+2 raves
Foo Master Angie October 19, 2007 14:48:26 (edited)

Answered: no my favorit is.....
The quickest way to a man's heart is through Chuck Norris' fist.
OR
When the boogeyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

One more...
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
spider_brad August 02, 2007 22:44:37

Answered: Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Probably my least favorite actor ever captured on film, but that quote is pure genius.
Patrick July 18, 2007 11:21:42

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Three times world champ.
+2 raves
bearco July 12, 2007 14:33:58

Answered: no my favorit is.....
The only cure for cancer is in Chuck Norris's tears, but Chuck Norris never cries.
+1 raves
Valkyries "In God We Trust" July 09, 2007 05:14:55

Answered: no my favorit is.....
That He Stopped making Movies! ( I Hope )
highlatte June 30, 2007 18:31:51

Answered: no my favorit is.....
Don't know much about Chuck Norris movies or TV. These are all very funny. lol
+1 raves
Matt June 30, 2007 15:42:36

Answered: no my favorit is.....
When chuck norris does push ups, he doesn't push up, he pushes the world down.
+1 raves
sarah June 30, 2007 11:24:17

Answered: There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
yeah he is known for being peaceful and all... but these facts are just for fun and this is the one that i find is the funniest...
Michael June 14, 2007 03:42:29

Answered: Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
He is famous for NOT using violence to resolve arguements.
+1 raves
Fef June 07, 2007 01:28:49

Answered: There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris kicks major tail. I remember growing up as a kid and arguing with friends over who would win a fight (hint poll idea): "Who would win, Chuck Norris or Bruce Lee?" I always favored Chuck.

I've met him and really enjoy his company. Go Chuck!
Ricky to Fef June 07, 2007 01:34:04

lol chuck norris makes me laugh yea im do that poll thanks fef =)
+1 raves
K man May 31, 2007 00:58:39

Answered: There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Dave Letterman did this list while he was on the show and it was a riot. The funny thing is that Chuck is about 5'4" and they have always had to hide that with props and camera angles.
Fef to K man June 07, 2007 01:35:49

Chuck Norris didn't have to hide this. He chose this. Chuck doesn't hide from anything.