Question Entertainment
JOKE: Are you a GRASSHOPPER or a Ant? Read Below?
steve November 05, 2009 01:54:56
- 41 answers
- Read all 45 comments
- +14 raves
OLD VERSION
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away..
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
-------------------------------------------------------------...
MODERN VERSION
The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.
CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.'
ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome " . Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
President Obama condemns the ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight.
Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share..
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood..
The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it..
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2010.
-------------------------------------------------------------...
I've sent this to you because I believe that you are an ant and not a grasshopper! Make sure that you pass this on to other ants. Don 't bother sending it on to any grasshoppers because they wouldn't understand it, anyway.
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away..
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
-------------------------------------------------------------...
MODERN VERSION
The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.
CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.'
ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome " . Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
President Obama condemns the ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight.
Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share..
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood..
The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it..
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2010.
-------------------------------------------------------------...
I've sent this to you because I believe that you are an ant and not a grasshopper! Make sure that you pass this on to other ants. Don 't bother sending it on to any grasshoppers because they wouldn't understand it, anyway.
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ANt
66%
27 votes |
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None of the above
22%
9 votes | |
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Undecided
10%
4 votes | |
|
Grasshopper
2%
1 vote |
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None of the above
ANt
ANt
A friend of mine sent me this a couple of weeks ago. She told me that someone she sent it to said it was racist.
I pointed out that THEY were actually the racist since ACORN helps all people regardless of color and they attached an ethnicity to a grasshopper.
ANt
ANt
If you need to have the flesh removed from a specimen, ants are your best bet.
ANt
None of the above
ANt
Undecided
ANt
And pestilence has invaded our government.
None of the above
ANt
None of the above
So don't be an ant or a grasshopper. BE AN AMERICAN and VOTE THESE GUYS OUT in 2010!!
Undecided
On another note do you know where the story of the ant comes from? Well, here's one place I found it ....
Go to the ant, O sluggard,
consider her ways, and be wise,
Without having any chief, officer, or ruler,
she prepares her bread in summer and gathers her food in winter.
How long will you lie there, O sluggard?
When will you arise from your sleep?
A little sleep, a little slumber,
a little folding of the hands to rest,
and poverty will come upon you like a robber,
and want like an armed man.
Proverbs 6:6-11
Undecided
ANt
ANt
ANt
Undecided
though i often feel dissappointed when slackers get better grades than me. or actually do their homework when i didn't. but that's not taking advantage of me. that's just trying to help themselves.
idk. i would think illegal immigrants are grasshoppers. and bill gates. DX
ANt